Tag Archives: tigers

11

Tommy Tiger’s New School

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Meet Alexei and Rory: Ohio zoo names adorable new tiger cubs

Tommy was really excited. His mom had signed him up at the new school in the neighborhood. He was tired of being home-schooled and wanted to meet some other cats.

He was a little surprised by how small some of his classmates were. But everyone seemed really friendly. He made friends quickly and started hanging out with Billy and Eddie.  Before long, they were inseparable. They sat together and played together at recess.

kitten and tiger cub head bonks - Meow Aum!

Some of the older kids started making fun of Tommy because he was so big. He thought it was rather rude of them since he had never pointed out how small he thought they were.

Jimmy: Hey, kid! You’re no kitten. Look at those paws!

Tommy: What’s wrong with my paws?

Three Sets Of Baby Tiger Paws at Potter Park Zoo - ZooBorns

Jimmy: They’re huge!

Tommy: That’s not nice! Take it back!

Larry: He’s right. Those aren’t paws. They’re mitts.

Tommy felt like he was going to cry. He was much too gentle to fight with the little cats, but he didn’t understand why they were talking about his paws. They were the perfect size for his body. Eddie ran to get their teacher.

HD wallpaper: tiger cub and short-fur gray tabby kitten, cat, Wallpaper, friendship | Wallpaper Flare

Ms. Smithers came up and saw the tiger cub with the three kittens (Billy, Jimmy, and Larry). She had been a little nervous about having a tiger in the school. She hoped he wasn’t causing trouble.

Ms. Smithers: What’s going on here?

Billy: Jimmy and Larry are being mean. They’re making fun of Tommy’s paws.

Jimmy: They’re huge! I’ve never seen paws that size.

Indrah makes three: Malayan tiger cub joins Amur cubs at Metroparks Zoo

Ms. Smithers: Jimmy! Apologize immediately! His paws are perfect.

Larry: His paws are twice the size of mine.

Ms. Smithers: He’s almost twice your size.

Larry: I know. I figured he must have been held back a couple of times.

Ms. Smithers: No, he’s the same age as you are. Haven’t you ever met a tiger cub before?

Meet Dash, the Wildcat Sanctuary's First-Ever Newborn Tiger Cub - Mpls.St.Paul Magazine

Jimmy: He’s a tiger? Whoa! That is so cool! Sorry, dude! Don’t eat me!

Tommy was confused. Why would he eat Jimmy?

Ms. Smithers: He’s not going to eat you. Apologize correctly, please.

tiger cubs for sale | baby tiger cubs sale | Exotic Wild Cats

Jimmy: I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were a tiger. You look like a big kitten.

Tommy: It’s OK. I didn’t know there weren’t any other tigers here. I won’t eat you. But please leave me alone.

Jimmy and Larry looked at each other and walked away.

It was the first and only time that Tommy was bullied at his new school. Soon he fit right in and was just one of the group.

Tiger and Kittens - Animals Photo (2960144) - Fanpop

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

24

Senior Year Memories

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16 Cats-Graduation Day... ideas | cats, cats and kittens, funny cats

Paisley was looking through her yearbook at what some of her classmates had been signing. Senior year had been so exciting. She was kind of sad it was almost over. The memories started flooding back.

Siberian Tiger - Facts and Beyond | Biology Dictionary

Hey Babe – Sorry about threatening to eat your date for prom. Glad we could work things out. We really belong together. Love 4ever Tommy

Keep Calm and Love Science: Laboratory Cat | Biyoloji

You were the best chemistry partner ever!!! Wonder if they’ll ever get that stain off the table. Gwen

Funny Quotes About Cats And Dogs Fighting. QuotesGram

Wishing you a lifetime of happiness. No hard feelings about that huge fight we had in the lunchroom over who has the best personality. Peace out, Kaylie

Cat Singing - Funny Cat Pictures | Cute animals, Funny cat pictures, Cats

Seems like we’ve been friends forever. Wish I didn’t have to leave town immediately following graduation. My boyfriend is sure we’ll make a lot of money on the road. Love, Jasmine

Cat Riding on top of his best friend : AnimalsBeingBros

Good luck in college. Sure you’ll be top cat wherever you go. Even in the dog-eat-dog “real world”. Ashley

Cute Raccoon (@bulka_s_makam) | Twitter

Sorry we didn’t get a chance to know each other a little better. Apologies once again for almost setting you on fire during the Senior trip. Hamilton

Cat With Makeup : aww

Your sleepovers were legendary. Your brother was so cute with makeup!! Jen

TheMetaPicture.com | Funny animal pictures, Funny animals, Funny cats

Going to prom with you was a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Thank goodness. Eddie

What Is The Name For A Group Of Cats? - Tuxedo Cat

The halls of Madison High will be a little quieter without you. Wishing you the best. Mr. Taylor, English Dept.

Photos Of Cat's Being Hilariously Overly Dramatic With Their Owners

Best of luck to my favorite drama queen. Mrs. Parks, Theater and Arts Dept.

16 Cats-Graduation Day... ideas | cats, cats and kittens, funny cats

Pictures courtesy of Google Images

24

Did You Know? Some More Fun Facts

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BOOKs • eBOOKs • LIBROs » http://Pinterest.com/RamiroMacias/Books-Libros | Crazy cats, Cats, Baby cats

We found an article with “100 Interesting Facts about Cats.” We didn’t want to just copy it for you. We didn’t really find everything they said to be all that interesting. If you don’t believe us, or want to read it anyway, the link is below. (We know. They must have worked pretty hard to put out a dull cat fact.)

Do your cats love sleeping in the sun? « The Pet Product Guru

Some of the information was of the “duh” type: Keeping your cat busy all day will help them sleep better at night. Of course it will. We generally sleep 12-16 hours each day. If we can’t sleep when it’s light, we have to sleep when it’s dark. However, we LIKE to sleep during the day. That’s when the sunpuddles are out.

Create meme "cat with tongue " - Pictures - Meme-arsenal.com

A couple of the others were not as true as they made them seem. They said a cat’s tongue is as rough as sandpaper. Some of us are definitely fine-grain, while others are for the heavy-duty early work. And they say that cats wag their tails (move them back and forth) to show they are angry or irritated. Snoops shows contentment this way when the humans pet her. She’d like to think she’s unique, but she’s not.

Some of the other stuff was kind of interesting:

cat talk - Imgflip

We are the only felines that meow. We developed the ability so we could talk to humans. Too bad they never learned to listen. (Actually, some of them do try to listen, and a few even have gotten it down.)

Tigers & House Cats Share 95.6% DNA - Purrfect Love

Our genes are 95.6% tiger. It definitely explains our swagger and cool. There is also a bit of lion in us. Cats definitely rule for a reason.

Nobody Helps Me Around This House": When Cats Are Giving a Helping Paw With House Chores | Cat work, Cats, Cat memes

Some cats love the smell of chlorine.  We met a kitty in the blogosphere who loves bleach, and here it is again! Apparently, there are some chemical similarities with cat urine. It can have psychedelic effects on those kitties. Unfortunately, we just think it stinks.

There is such a thing as a (stray)cat strut. We start walking with both of our right feet followed by both of our left feet. That way we move one side of our body at a time. Giraffes and camels walk this way too, but guess who else? Tigers!

If It Fits, I Sits: The Truth Behind Why Cats Love Small Spaces | Cat love, Cats, Sit

Our collarbones don’t connect to the rest of our bones. They attach to our front legs, but nothing else. So if our head fits through, so do we. (Make sure your human doesn’t make a fat joke here. If they do, please (clawlessly) whap them.)

Tux cat drinking tap water | Crazy cats, Cat drinking, Funny cats

We are picky about our drinking water. We are creatures of the wild. Stagnant water can be dangerous water. If our bowl water has been standing longer than the toilet water, guess which one is more appealing? Of course, sometimes we just like to drink your water.

Best Funny Videos - Funny Cats and Dogs vs Lemons - Funny Animal Compilation - YouTube

Many of us don’t like the smell of lemons and oranges. We kitties have extremely sensitive noses and citrus fruit smells strong! If you must use that lemon air freshener, would you please do it somewhere else?

Meme Center - Largest Creative Humor Community | Funny animal memes, Funny animal pictures, Cat memes

Some of us see humans as bigger, hairless (clumsy) cats. And some of us think that is an appalling idea. However, we do try to groom you and teach you to hunt because we love you, regardless of what you are. And those thumb are incredibly useful.

Animals Waving Goodbye 4 Kitten | Kittens cutest, Cute cats and kittens, Cats and kittens

Facts courtesy https://facts.net/nature/animals/cat-facts

Pictures courtesy Google Images

Commentary courtesy us

7

The Animal Rights Coalition – Part 4

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Image result for animals as attorneys meme

Where we are: The Animal Rights Coalition (ARC) has been working to stop humans from using their names as insults. They have had no luck with submitting a petition or trying to meet with the members of the Human Council. Gregg Bear and Ivan Tiger decide that it is time to consult with a lawyer. (Links to the previous sections are found at the right)

Gregg and Ivan are waiting in the offices of Sharkfin and Sharkfin to meet with the attorney. A well-groomed Siamese cat approached them.

Siamese: Hello, I’m Greta. I’ve been assigned your case.

Image result for confused bear

Gregg and Ivan looked at each other. Was this some kind of joke? This cat was not going to intimidate a bunch of humans. What was she going to do? Purr loud?

Ivan: Meaning no disrespect….

Greta: You want to know why I’m not a shark, right?

Gregg: Actually, yes. We’ve been trying to get a bunch of humans to listen to us and we wanted someone to get their attention.

Greta: Actually, that’s why they sent me. If you two aren’t going to intimidate them, we certainly won’t.

Image result for tiger with human

Ivan: What do we do?

Greta: First, you have to know what is going to get their attention. What can you do that they can’t ignore? When do you interact with the humans?

Ivan: We see them at the stores and at work. But that’s just the regular humans.

Greta: OK. But they’re all just regular humans.

Image result for animal business meme

Ivan: Some of them are more important. They own things and tell other people what to do.

Gregg: We want to get their attention.

Greta: Then you need to make them understand that their insults are having an impact on their business. You need to tell people to stop using their products until the humans stop insulting you.

Gregg and Ivan left, confused. They had wanted to hire someone to sue the humans. This cat wanted them to educate the humans. They called another ARC meeting.

Image result for animal meeting

Gregg: We met with a lawyer. She said that we need to get the humans to see that we’re important to their business before they’ll listen to us.

Cecile Ferret: I guess that makes sense. They’ve thought they’re better and smarter than us forever.

Joe Iguana: They take us for granted.

Ivan: That’s what the lawyer said.

Ralph: OK. What do we do?

Image result for clean dog

The animals talked about which businesses they might be able to influence. They decided that they would only do one at first to see if anything happened. The first business they targeted was Adderson’s Shoe Supplies. They posted this message outside shoe stores:

“Please buy a brand other than Adderson’s. Their advertising calls tired, stinky feet “dogs”. We want them to find a different way to sell their product. Thank you. ARC

The signs didn’t work. People still bought the shoes.

Gregg: I don’t think this is a very good idea.

Image result for animal picnic meme

Joe: I don’t know why we chose shoes. We don’t wear shoes. We should have done food. Food is always good.

Cecile: Did you hear? We made the news!

“Tonight’s local take is the boycott ARC is trying to start against Adderson’s Shoes for slander. It seems the animals are finally tired of being insulted. Good luck!”

Image result for luck animal

Ivan: Great. We’ll need it.

Cecile: It gets better. Look at this:

Animal call for end to insults spreads. Several areas have picked up on the ARC animals’ quest to end animal name insults. Protest is gaining momentum.

Three months later: Due to grass-roots pressure from their customers, humans included, the Human Council began the process to identify and eliminate institutional animal insults.

Image result for happy animals

 

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

17

The Animal Rights Coalition – Part 3

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Image result for fluffy calico cat

Where we are: The Animal Rights Coalition (ARC) tried to take a petition to a human council meeting, but were barred from entering. ARC wanted the humans to stop using animal names as insults. A guard took the petition and said that he would give it to council.

Two weeks went by before the animals received a letter from W. Charles Smith, President of the Council on Human/Animal Relations:

Dear Animals

We have received your petition listing your concerns about us using your names as insults. We appreciate your bringing this matter to our attention. I have assigned a committee to look into the matter.

Sincerely

W.C. Smith

Image result for angry giraffe

Julie Giraffe: Those rotten rutabagas! They’re just trying to get rid of us.

Roni Baboon: You’re right, Julie. They’re not going to do anything.

Chester Rabbit: I’m afraid you’re right. We’ll have to try something else.

Ralph Badger: Let’s dig under their building and let it collapse.

Benny Buffalo: No, let’s stampede them.

Image result for angry skunk

Simon Skunk: No, we should sabotage their air filtration.

Chester: Calm down, everyone. That’s not going to make anyone happy. We need to work together.

Chrissy Calico: I don’t know what we can do. They don’t respect us at all. Remember what he called us? “Cute.” Humans don’t pay attention to “cute”.

Gregg Bear: OK, let me talk to them. They won’t think I’m cute and cuddly. I’m over 500 pounds of muscle and fur.

Ivan Tiger: I’ll go too. I can growl loud enough to scare any human.

Ralph: I guess that will work. But be polite. Otherwise, they’ll call you animals.

Chrissy: They are animals.

Ralph: I know. But humans use it as an insult.

Image result for friendly bear

Gregg and Ivan walked over to the Council Hall and went in the front door. The receptionist looked up and asked if she could help them.

Ivan: Yes, thank you. We would like to see Mr. Smith, please.

Receptionist: Do you have an appointment?

Ivan: No, we don’t. Please tell him we’re from ARC.

Receptionist (knowing there would be trouble if she let a bear and a tiger into the building): Mr. Smith doesn’t see anyone without an appointment.

Ivan: Please tell him that we won’t take up much of his time.

Image result for happy tiger

Receptionist (beginning to get nervous): I’m sorry, but you’ll have to make an appointment.

Ivan: Please just ask.

Receptionist: All right. Let me check.

She called someone and said that there was a bear and a tiger to see Charles. No, they weren’t threatening. They were very polite. She listened, then hung up the phone.

Receptionist: Someone will be out shortly.

Ivan: Thank you.

Ivan and Gregg moved to the side of the lobby and waited. Before long, two security guards arrived.

Image result for tiger and bear

Security Guard: What seems to be the problem?

Ivan: There isn’t a problem. We just want to see Mr. Smith.

Security Guard: Didn’t the lady tell you you’d need an appointment?

Ivan: Yes, she did. We just need a minute of his time.

Guard: He won’t see you. You need to leave.

Ivan: Why won’t he see us?

Image result for bear on hind legs

The guard didn’t want to tell them that Mr. Smith was afraid of large animals.

Guard: He can see whoever he wants.

Gregg: That’s ridiculous. Just let us past. We’ll find him ourselves.

Guard (nervously): You need to go now.

Ivan was getting irritated. He let out a low growl. Gregg took a step toward the guard.

Gregg: Now see here…

Guard: Leave this minute or I’ll call the police.

Gregg: Let us past you.

Image result for wet hens

The guard picked up the phone.

Guard: Yes, we need you at the Council Hall. There’s a bear and a tiger here. We need you to get them out of here. They’re meaner than grizzlies.

Gregg: I AM a grizzly.

Guard: I mean they’re madder than wet hens.

Gregg and Ivan looked at each other in disgust and stalked out the door.

Ivan: I guess we’ll have to get a lawyer.

He took out his phone and entered the number.

Voice: Sharkfin and Sharkfin, Attorneys-at-Law. How may I help you?

Image result for shark as attorney

 

21

Homeowners’ Association Monthly Meeting

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Image result for cat at house

Forest Glenn is an upper middle class subdivision with a diverse multi-species population. Before moving in, residents must sign a contract agreeing to be governed by the decisions of the Homeowners’ Association.

Please find below the minutes from the August 1, Forest Glenn Homeowners’ Association Monthly Meeting.

The meeting was called to order at 7:00 pm. Approximately 30 homes were represented at the meeting.

Image result for animals in swimming pool

Horace Hogg, president of the Association, reminded everyone that the pool would be closed for the season following the annual Labor Day party. He wants everyone to be courteous in the dish they bring to the event. We do not want a repeat of last year when one of the guests saw a relative being eaten by other guests.

Halloween is coming. A reminder to residents: no decorations are allowed that flash, light up, or are offensive to other residents. Therefore, witches and pumpkins are acceptable, but no negative portrayals of cats or bats.

Image result for halloween decorations

Decorations are limited to the porch and front of the house. Real blood is prohibited due to health concerns.

There have been violations of several Association policies during the past month. If residents have not corrected the problem by the end of August, fees will be assessed.

Image result for animals eating plants

Grass must be no higher than 1 inch – Beau Bison, Shelley Sheep. Lack of appetite is not an acceptable reason for non-compliance.

Image result for welcome gnome

No lawn ornaments – Dolly Deer, Joe Jaguar, Bob Beaver. Lawn ornaments include (but are not limited to) gnomes, flamingos, and wooden “Welcome” signs.

Image result for tree house

No buildings except a house and garage – Alan Aardvark. Buildings include sheds, tree houses and permanent play houses for your children.

trImage result for multiple flags on house

One flag may be displayed per house and no flags larger than 2 feet by 3 feet displayed from the front of the house – Edgar Eagle, Larry Lion. Flags include national flags, state flags, school flags, college flags, and club membership flags. Homemade flags are discouraged. Flagpoles are prohibited.

Image result for political signs

Political signs are not allowed on lawns – Delilah Donkey, Edgar Elephant. These signs are considered lawn ornaments, and particularly tacky ones. No one cares who you are voting for.

Image result for shrub fence

Only shrub fences – Tommy Tortoise. Any other material would ruin the natural beauty of the subdivision. If residents were allowed to use materials of their choosing, we would be faced with the possibility of something cheap and tacky. You know we can’t trust everyone’s taste.

Image result for animal on motorcycle

Quiet time between midnight and 6 am – Billy Bat, Harold Hyena. Nocturnal animals are welcome in the neighborhood, but must abide by association rules. Additionally, parties which last past midnight must be moved into the home. Vehicles with loud engines may not be used during the quiet period.

Some reminders for fall:

Image result for hedgehog in leaf pile

Do not burn your leaves. They may be used for mulch or saved in the backyard for burrowing relatives to use during the winter. The Association will collect unwanted leaves for the less fortunate.

Image result for animals eating plants

All plants must be trimmed back to no more than a foot tall before the snow falls. You are welcome to eat them yourselves or share with a friend. We will provide names of plant trimmers upon request. You may add small branches to your mulch or leaf pile if you wish.

If you are expecting relatives for the winter, fees are due to be paid no later than October 15. As usual, group rates are available.

The meeting adjourned at 9 pm. The next meeting will be September 5.

Image result for cats in fall

19

Limerick Lunacy

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Image result for limerick ireland

(Limerick, Ireland)

Ed.Comment: Every once in a while, we like to let Cat write something for the blog. (It lets her feel like she’s part of the team, not just the site owner.) So here’s her contribution. We will be back to regular content next week.

Image result for howling wolf

The young wolves were ready to howl.

They had spent the night on a prowl.

But the moon was not bright,

So they started to fight;

And were left in a mood quite foul.

Image result for playing kittens

The kittens loved to play and romp.

On rubber mousies they would chomp.

They never stopped,

Or exhausted, flopped,

While trying to find things to whomp.

Image result for bears on ice

The laughing bear cubs slid on the ice.

The slick ice on their paws felt quite nice.

Then one started to fall

And his mother did call,

Because he needed her ice advice.

Image result for cat on lap

Sometimes our dear cats become jealous,

And may use many means to tell us

That they want to play

Or in our laps lay.

And on that point become quite zealous.

Image result for panda

Is the panda really a bear?

Or another species quite rare?

He’s adorably cute

In his black-and-white suit.

Relatives? He hasn’t a care.

Image result for animals playing

(not related, but very cute)

 

Pictures courtesy of Google Images

5

Lions and Tigers and Bears (and Kittens)

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Image result for lions and tigers and bears

 

The lionesses planned a big night out

That the male lions weren’t happy about.

The cubs whined and cried

Til Mom’s nerves were fried

And so she went out and let them all pout.

Image result for lionesses

 

Tony and Tom Tiger ran away

Into the forest so they could play.

Their mother called out,

And they had no doubt

They needed to get home without delay.

Image result for tiger cubs

 

Polar, Kodiak, Panda, Brown, Black

Which bear thinks I’d be a tasty snack?

“Ugh,” says Brown Bear.

What have you there?

Tuna? Now that will cause a snack attack!

Image result for bears

 

She was a small, adorable ball of fur,

Who had the sweetest, most endearing purr.

But at time for bed,

She laid on my head.

And until breakfast time, she wouldn’t stir.

Image result for sleeping kitten

 

Why are kittens made so darn incredibly cute?

Soft fur, little meows, lots of cuddles to boot.

With energy to spare,

And the down time quite rare,

You forgive the disgusting dead mouse in your boot.

Image result for kitten on human

 

(pictures from Google images)

5

Newsflash: IAOC Bans Tigers

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(Google Images/Pinterest)

 

Dateline: July 22, 2016

Irkutsk, Siberia – Rumors have been running rampant that the International Animal Olympics Committee (IAOC) was investigating the Siberian Tiger swim team. Those rumors were verified today when Ferdinand Fox, President of the IAOC, issued the following statement:

“After months of testing and research, the IAOC has determined that the Siberian Tiger swim team has consistently shown inappropriately high levels of testosterone. The guidelines for the Animal Olympics are very specific, and the Siberians have not met the requirements. Unfortunately, we have no choice but to ban the team from the 2016 Animal Olympics.

“We did not make this decision lightly. We know that the Siberian Tigers have always been an important part of the swimming competition. However, we must abide by the guidelines. The integrity of the Games is more important than any one team.”

The sports world’s reaction was mainly surprise. Given the strength of the Siberian team, no one thought the IAOC would have the fortitude to penalize the team. The Siberian Olympic management issued a competing statement:

“The charges are ridiculous. Our swimmers are the strongest tigers in the world. Of course they have high levels of testosterone. We would never inject them with additional hormones. The meat we use comes straight from Moscow and is guarded to prevent adulteration.

“We do not plan to challenge this ban. After training in the pure waters of Siberia, the filthy water in the Olympic venue would probably make the team sick anyway. We feel that we are being singled out unfairly because of our strength. These charges are based on groundless rumors started by the Americans and Bengal Tigers because they have never been competitive against our superior training and strength.”

There was no immediate comment from the Americans or Bengalis.

We have not been able to verify reports that the athletes have threatened to eat the members of the IAOC who voted for the ban. There has been a lot of growling around the camp, but the tigers are forbidden to speak with the media.

This ruling will not impact past medals that the Siberians have won. Because of the lifespans of some of the Olympic participants (e.g., mice, some fish species), the IAOC has determined that awards will stand once they have been presented.

Reported by Ricky T. Tavi  (Google Images/Reddit)