10

The Biennial Bears` Bonfire – Part 3

The Black Bears of the Smokies - Mountain Realty Group

Background: Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. It is Anthony’s turn to speak. You can read Zeke’s story here. Anthony’s story is here.

Now it was Joe’s turn to tell his story.

My story is a little different because it’s about a human.

How About No Bear Meme - Imgflip

As you know, they have what they call “hunting season.” They think that as long as it’s the season, they can do whatever they want in our woods. Mainly they seem to tromp around and make a lot of noise. So I hear a couple of them walking around, trying to find whatever it was they were looking for.

Curious Bear by Joe Motohashi | Bear, Bear pictures, Bear photos

They ended up separating to see if they had better luck. I heard a shot, so I assumed they had been successful.

Then I heard one of the humans start yelling. I don’t really understand human very well, so I went closer to see what had happened. One of the humans was bleeding and the other one was leaning over him. My best guess is that the first human got shot somehow.

Petition · Environmental Protection Agency: Change name of a group ...

I thought I should help, so I went closer to offer. I guess it wasn’t a very good idea. The uninjured human tried to shoot me. Luckily, he was a terrible shot. So he started to run.

I couldn’t believe it. He left his friend behind so he could get away. I  guess he doesn’t know black bears are friendly around here.

I looked down at his buddy. He didn’t look so good. I mean humans are kinda funny looking without any fur, but this one looked particularly bad.

10 Philosophical Bears Thinking Deep Bear Thoughts

I didn’t know what to do. On the one paw, he had been out in my woods trying to kill someone. On the other paw, it seemed cruel to leave him there bleeding.

I  decided to drag him over to Dr. Fox. It wasn’t very far, but when the human saw me coming toward him, he fainted. It was a little insulting. After all, he was the one with the gun.

Hey comment a cute fox image if u love foxes | Object Shows Amino

Dr. Fox looked at the human and asked where I found him. I told him the whole story and asked whether he could help the human.

The doctor said that he would clean up the human and pack some herbs into the wound. It had worked on some others patients, but he hadn’t tried it on something so big. It was going to take a lot of herbs. I  said that I would go out and find them while he cleaned up the patient.

Bears Munching on Ants Indirectly Help Plants | Smart News ...

When I got back, it looked like the human was dead. Dr. Fox said not to worry; he had given his patient something to make him sleepy. I had to admit that he did look a lot better cleaned up and sleeping.

I gave Dr. Fox the herbs. He packed the wound with most of them, then made a paste to hold the herbs in place. The doctor asked how I was going to get him home.

Winter Dens - North American Bear CenterNorth American Bear Center

I hadn’t thought about that. I thought he’d be able to go home after Dr. Fox had fixed him. I certainly didn’t want him in my den; he would scare the children. And I had no idea where he lived. Besides, someone would probably try to shoot me again.

I told Dr. Fox that I needed to go home and talk to Ginny (my wife). She said that he could stay overnight, but that was it. We carried him home and made him a nice bed.The kids looked in on him, but weren’t impressed, so they went back to playing.

Pin on Cute <3

We found a phone in his pocket and found a number for “Home.” I couldn’t call them. Most humans don’t understand bear talk. Ginny said we should text them. She sent, “Git me.”

We waited for a response. “Where are you?” Hmm. That was a good question. How would the humans find him? “Lake Vista beach”

Brown bears in Lake Clark National Park, Alaska image - Free stock ...

“I’ll pick you up in the morning.”

We took him over to the lake in the morning and waited with him. A car finally got there, so we waited in the woods. A woman got out of the car and looked at our human. She started crying and called someone. An ambulance arrived a little later. They said they had no idea who would have packed the wound with herbs, but it saved the man’s life.

29 Animals Waving Goodbye For The Winter (With images) | Cute ...

Nexr week: Benjamin’s story

All pictures courtesy of Google Images

17

The Biennial Bears’ Bonfire – Part 2

Background: Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. It is Anthony’s turn to speak. You can read Zeke’s story here.

🔥 Black Bear with a salmon in its mouth : NatureIsFuckingLit

You guys know how much I  like to fish. I’m always the first one out there and pride myself on catching my own. I leave the ones that are already dead for the old guys or someone who has a bad day.

Last fall, something strange began to happen. I’d catch a fish and before I had a chance to get out of the water, this young eagle would grab the fish out of my mouth. The strange part was that as soon as he was away from me, he’d drop the fish.

Grizzly Bear and Bald Eagle (With images) | Bear fishing, Grizzly

The first time, I was annoyed. Stuff like that happens. I caught another fish and went home. The next day was fine, but after that it was a daily occurance.

Bald eagle and brown bear at Katmai National Park | Smithsonian ...

I couldn’t figure out what was happening. Was the poor bird hungry and just not able to hold onto his dinner? Was he incredibly clumsy? It looked like he was doing it on purpose, but that seemed pretty stupid.

I was riding a Washington State ferry when a bald eagle plucked a ...

My son Davey had been pestering me to go fishing. One sunny day, I decided to take him with me. I was teaching him some of the secrets to really good fishing. He was practicing and came up with a really nice salmon. When he turned to show me, that stupid eagle swooped in to grab it.

  How to Survive a Bear Attack: Brown Bears, Black Bears, and Polar ...

I went racing toward the eagle. He was so startled that he missed his target and skidded into the water. I started to laugh. He was fine, but his dignity was suffering.

Eagle and the Bear

I told the eagle that we needed to talk. My son was standing on the side of the river waiting. I told him that I would only be a couple of minutes.

I asked the eagle what he was doing. The eagle explained that it was a game. He was waiting to see how long it was before I got angry. He was pretty sure I’d be able to catch another fish and and not  go hungry.

I told him that he had achieved his goal. I also told him that if he tried it with my son again, he’d better start looking for another river. I think I scared him because I never saw him again.

Too much to bear? Amazing photographs show cub in Russia ...

I caught a fish after that and Davey and I enjoyed a picnic on the sunny river bank. We took a nap in the sun before we went home. The next time we went fishing, I told him show to protect his catch.

Ten Best in 2014 | Bear, Animals beautiful, Brown bear

Next week: Joe’s story.

All pictures courtesy of Google Images

 

 

18

The Biennial Bears’ Bonfire

Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. Each bear would tell a story about something that had happened to them during the previous two years, based on a given topic. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. It was Zeke’s turn to go first.

A Bears Quest for Food | Wise About Bears

My encounter was only a few weeks ago. I was wandering around, looking for berries. I heard a small rustling in one of the bushes. Whatever it was, it had to be small. I couldn’t figure out what kind of little animal wouldn’t be afraid of a bear, especially a full-size size male. Whatever it was, there were berries on the bush and I didn’t want to share them with whatever it was.

Kitten in the bush | Sand cat Sandkatt (Felis margarita) Pho… | Flickr

So I pushed the bush out of the way. I couldn’t believe what was down there. It was a tiny kitten! How would a kitten get there? It was terrified. I didn’t want to scare it anymore, so I sat down. After a while, she stopped shaking and came over to sniff me. I didn’t know what to do. She looked up at me and meowed.

She was so cute. I  reached out a paw and patted her. That was all it took. She started to purr. She climbed into my paw. I put her on my lap. She fell asleep almost immediately. She must have felt safe.

What should I do? I didn’t know anything about kittens. Where was her family? I couldn’t leave her in the woods, but where would she go?

I guess I shouldn’t have worried. When she woke up, she climbed up onto my shoulder. I couldn’t reach her, so I went home. I figured she would go back to her home from there. She climbed down in the den and started to look around. She had no intention of leaving.

I had no idea what to do. I went to Cheri, a lady raccoon I know. She looked a little bit like a cat, so I thought she might know. Cheri said it wasn’t safe to make the kitten leave. She told me that she would find some milk to feed the kitten.

To make a long story short, Kitty decided to adopt me. She follows me everywhere. I think she might think she’s a bear. I taught her how I get insects. Somehow, she learned how to hunt, so she’s eating well. We go to the river together to drink.

Cute video of kitten wrestling with large fish | PoC

She sleeps with me. That took a little getting used to. I was afraid I’d roll over and crush her. She decided that sleeping on me is safest. I think she feels safe with me. I’ve gotten used to having her around and would miss her if she left.

Joe: Where is Kitty now?

Cute little ginger kitten sleeping in gray blanket | Premium Photo

Zeke (embarrassed): I brought a blanket for her to sleep in while I’m with you guys.

Benjamin: She’s here? When do we get to meet her?

Zeke: I didn’t know if you’d want to. I’ll bring her to breakfast. She’ll feel better staying with me.

Our bears and their Habitat - North American Bear CenterNorth ...

Next week: Anthony’s story.

Pictures courtesy of Google Imag

21

Cat Forum: Bert Explains Non-Verbal Communication

(Bert before his release)

Greetings. Snoops and Kommando Kitty. here. Welcome to this month’s edition of Cat Forum. We are very pleased to have as our guest a friend of our human brother, Bert the Tuxie. He is going to display some common cat behaviors and explain their meanings. Bert believes in demonstrating his examples; he is a cat of few words. He will be happy to address any questions you may have.

(Talk to the paw)

Snoops: Hello, Bert. We’re so happy to finally meet you.

Bert: The pleasure is mine.

Snoops: I’ll turn things over to you.

Bert: Thank you very much. As every cat knows, humans do not really understand any cat dialect, regardless of what they claim. You have probably had the experience of asking for a particular type of food only to have your human say something like, “Be patient. I’ll feed you in a few minutes.” Some humans are no better at reading our expressions and/or body language. It can be extremely frustrating.

I have a totally pawsome human, but even so, sometimes I have to look at him and wonder, “Are you paying any attention at all?” I imagine that some of you have this problem more than others.So let’s get to work.

This pose is the one we use when we’re giving you permission to rub our tummies. Some humans would have you believe that no cat likes to have their tummy rubbed. Humans, proceed with caution the first time in case your kitty is showing trust rather than a desire to be petted. Pet gently, we keep food in there and would like to keep it there.

Just because we’ve allowed you the pleasure of rubbing our tummy, does not mean that you can do it forever. This face indicates that you have overstayed your welcome and need to find something else to do for me

.

If you see this face, it means that you have been annoying and need to stop whatever you have been doing. It can also mean that you are being especially human. Meaning that we understand what you are doing, but there is a much better way to do it if you would only listen to us.

This behavior means that I am enjoying my toy and you should go away.

I will look like this if I’ve enjoyed a little too much ‘nip. Humans: Do not share it on Instagram, Facebook, or anywhere else.You have been in the same condition, and I did not make fun of you.

This look should be understood by all humans. I am questioning why you would think that this food is acceptable and you need to fix the situation. Do not give a solid lump of food; I can’t cut it up is one possibility. Or maybe, I don’t recognize this smell. Are you sure it’s edible?

This look can be interpreted as either “What did you bring me?” or “I want what you have or I want to be offered so I can turn it down.” Humans don’t ever seem to learn that they can’t tell us that we won’t like something. We don’t trust humans to know our palates and want to be sure.

These last few pictures are just to remind you how overwhelmingly cute cats are.

I hope that you have enjoyed my presentation. Let Snoops and Kommando Kitty know if you have questions. I’ll be happy to answer them for you.

21

Springtime in the Subdivision – Conclusion

Baby Giraffe & Golden Retriever Dog - Best Friends! - Eating ...

Where we are: The residents of Mountain Valley Estates are up in arms about their neighbor Fred’s efforts to keep the neighborhood in compliance with the Association’s rules. His insistence on an overly strict interpretation of the rules has irritated most of his neighbors. They have told Jim, the Association President, that either he gets rid of Fred or they will vote him out of office. You can find Part 1 here and Part 2 here.

The animals have agreed to give Jim two weeks to solve the problem. Toward the end of that time, several of the guys were talking.

People Are Loving The Adventures Of This Hedgehog And Its Bengal ...

Jean-Luc Hedgehog: I haven’t seen Fred of a while. Is he hiding?

Ben Bruin: We were pretty rough on him.

Steve Skunk: Yeah. He was just trying to do his job. And he is our friend.

Al Angora: Maybe. But I get angry when someone makes Fluffy cry.

Henry Goat: Don’t worry guys. He’s OK. He just went to see his brother for the two weeks.

Ben: Good. That will get his mind off what is happening here.

I now call the First Annual meeting of the Unbearably Cute Animals ...

On the promised day, Jim called a meeting to give an update. The animals waited in anticipation.

Jim: Thank you for being here today. Fred and I have come to the decision that he is going to retire.

The animals couldn’t believe what they were hearing. No one really thought that Fred would give up his job.

Amelia Alligator: Did you force him to retire? What’s Fred going to do with his time?

Al:Yeah. I was pretty upset. But I thought you’d be able to come up with some kind of compromise.

GeorgeWBush Library on Twitter: "#ArchivesCUTE First Dog Barney ...

Jim: No, I didn’t fire him. Fred, why don’t you come up here and explain why you are retiring.

Fred: While I was staying with my brother, I did some thinking. I’ve been able to tell that you’re not happy with me. I was going to suggest that we have some meetings to find common ground.

The animals were nodding approvingly, but still wondered how this led to retirement.

Fred: One day, my brother and I went to a diner for breakfast. The waitress and I talked for a long time. We went out that night and were together for the rest of my visit. I’d like to introduce you to the wonderful lady who is going to be my wife. Come on up here, Sweetie.

At first, the animals were stunned into silence. But as the beautiful German Shepard joined Fred, they burst into cheers.

German Shepherd Dog Breed Information and Pictures

Fred: This is Vicki, everyone. She made me the happiest dog in the world when she agreed to marry me.

Steve: But why are you retiring?

Fred: Vicki said that she would make sure I had plenty to do.

Everyone laughed.

Jean-Luc: That’s wonderful, Fred. Congratulations!

Ellen Elk: Congratulations, Fred. But who’s going to make sure the subdivision is going to keep looking good?

German Shepherd memes | Page 2 | German Shepherds Forum

Jim walked back and took the microphone.

Jim: Since I just found out, Fred has agreed to continue until the wedding. Vicki promised to keep him in line.

Everyone laughed again.

Amelia: But what happens after that?

Jim: I’m going to take applications, and the Board will vote on the candidates. We have a month until the wedding.

Accommodating goat gives a chicken a warm roost. | Goats, Farm animals

A few weeks later, Jim called another meeting.

Jim: There were only two applicants interested in the job. The board had an extremely hard time deciding who to choose. So, Emma Chicken and Fred Goat will share the responsibilities. They will write up what they see as violations and give the information to me. At our weekly meeting, the Board will decide whether a letter should be sent to the homeowner.

That decision sounded fair to the animals. Fred’s last month was uneventful. He and Vicki had a beautiful wedding with all of his friends attending.

15 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Adopt A German Shepherd

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

21

Springtime in the Subdivision – Part 2

Protesting Cats | Occupy Cuteness seantrank.com | sean.trank | Flickr

Where we are: Fred Fido and two friends have volunteered to police the subdivision for outside violations of the Association’s code. Some of the other residents think Fred is taking his responsibilities a little too seriously. Jim Giraffe, the Association President, has called for a meeting to discuss the rules. See Part 1 here.

Jim: Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for attending this meeting. We have some important business to discuss.

Al Angora: We certainly do. I want you to put him on a leash.

Angry Dogs Compilation - YouTube

He points at Fred, who bares his teeth.

Al: Figurative speaking, of course.

Fred relaxes a little.

Jim: Al, those are pretty strong words. Are you sure that’s what you meant to say?

Why Do Cats Hiss? | Cuteness

Al: Yes, I’m sure. He got Fluffy crying, and she begged me to come home and cut the grass. It wasn’t even a quarter inch over the required height.

Fred: But you admit that it was too long.

Al arched his back and sat down.

Peppi Pomeranian: I agree with Al. Fred is going too far. I was watering my lawn on the correct day when Fred came by and said that my lawn was wet enough.

Funny Dogs Playing With Hose Compilation - YouTube

Fred: She was wasting water. It was running into the street.

Peppi: That’s because I forgot to turn off the water when you and your crew started yelling at me.

Fred: So you acknowledge that you were wasting water.

Peppi growled and sat down.

Warm weather prompts early alligator appearances in Myrtle Beach ...

Jim: OK. Fred and his friends may have been a little over-enthusiastic. But that’s no reason to be hostile. Remember, he is volunteering his time, and the neighborhood looks a lot better.

Sarah Squirrel: I don’t care. We got a citation for having a lawn ornament. The “ornament” was my mother-in-law sleeping in the sun for a couple of days in a row.

Amelia Alligator: He did the same thing to me about my kids. He said he didn’t know that alligators have to bask in the sun to stay alive.

Meme Maker - everyone-talking-about-cats-and-im-like-bears-are-cool

Ben Bruin: He gave me a noise citation in the middle of the day. My neighbors didn’t call to complain. They know it’s just my natural voice.

The animals started to talk over each other, getting angrier as time went by. It seemed as if Fred had upset everyone in the neighborhood.

Cute animal picture of the day: baby giraffe

Jim: All right, everyone. Let’s settle down so we can discuss this like civilized animals.

Fred: I’m sorry if I offended you. I was just trying to be helpful.

Peppi: You used to be a good dog, Fred. We were buddies.

Amelia: Yeah. You were the first one to welcome us to the neighborhood.

12 Baby Skunks That Are Just Too Stinkin' Cute! - I Can Has ...

Some of the other animals nodded and shared stories.

Steve Skunk: I agree. But you still have to go. You complained about the smell in the house that was getting outside through the open window. Seriously, Fred? We’re skunks.

Al: Sorry, Fred. I agree with Steve. I want you to find something else to do with your spare time.

Fred’s ears and tail were drooping.

Do Dogs Grieve Other Dogs? – American Kennel Club

Fred: I guess I need to quit. You’ll have to hire a professional to do the job.

Jim: Wait a minute, Fred. I like your attitude. Let me think of some way we can compromise on this.

The animals groaned and looked at each other.

Al: You better think of something fast, or we’ll get rid of you too.

Black tabby is angry. | Turkish angora cat, Turkish van cats ...

Next week: Will Jim’s plan work and bring peace to Mountain Valley Estates?

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

22

Springtime in the Subdivision

Oregon Golf Course to Offer Trained Goat Caddies | SwingU Clubhouse

The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and spring was in the air. Everything looked tranquil in Mountain Valley Estates. A golf cart carrying a dog, a goat, and a chicken was slowly driving around the subdivision.

A group of women were standing in the yard of one of the houses talking when they saw the cart.

In areas of rapid urban development, squirrels and alligators have ...

Sarah Squirrel: Look who’s coming. It’s the Yard Police.

Amelia Alligator: Sarah, we better get home.

Josephine Jaguar: You’re right. We all know what happens if you’re not at home when they stop by.

Amelia: They write your name in their little book and you get a letter from the Association about some imaginary violation.

Writing an Effective Dog Professional Bio – dogbiz

Sarah: It wouldn’t be so bad if they actually worked for the Association. But Fred Fido got bored and talked Henry Goat and Emma Chicken into doing this. The whole thing is ridiculous.

Amelia: I agree. And you can’t talk to them about anything. If they say it’s a problem, it’s a problem.

Sarah and Amelia went home, and Josephine went inside. On her way home, Sarah saw Fred talking to Fluffy Angora.

Turkish Angora Cats, The Cats That Love To Play.

Fred: I need to talk to you about a problem with your yard.

Fluffy: What’s the problem?

Fred: Henry measured your grass, and it’s almost an inch and a half high. You know the Association rules say that it shouldn’t be more than one and a quarter inches high, and the preferred height is one inch.

STALKER CAT IS WATCHING YOU | Stalker Meme on ME.ME

Fluffy: But the Association made an exception for us. Al works out of town as a mouser, and we have four young kittens.

Fred: OK. Then I’ll write it up as a warning. You need to tell Al to get home and mow it. I’m going to talk to Jim (the Association President) and tell him what’s going on.

Fluffy: All right.

Fred: Have a good day.

Fluffy: Thank you.

Family owned and operated! QUALITY Lawn maintenance + a whole lot ...

Fluffy closed the door. How dare that dog accuse them of not taking care of their yard. And that goat had been eating the grass, not measuring it.

Fred: Sometimes, I hate doing this job. It seems like no one appreciates us.

Emma: They just don’t understand how difficult it is to keep a place this big looking good.

Henry: Look! Over there! Water usage violation.

Should You Give Hedgehogs a Bath? - HedgehogNation

Fred went up to Jean-Luc Hedgehog who was holding container of water.

Fred: Jean-Luc, are you aware that you are in violation of the water usage code the Association has distributed?

Jean-Luc: What do you mean?

Fred: Your house’s address ends in an odd number. You can’t water your lawn until tomorrow.

Jean-Luc: I’m not watering my lawn.

Fred: Then why are you carrying water around?

Thoughts on Hedgehog vegetable car? - Hedgehog

Jean-Luc: It’s a watering can. I’m watering my vegetables.

Fred: They’re green, so they’re part of your lawn.

Jean-Luc: That’s ridiculous. They’re new plant. They’ll die if I don’t water them every day.

Fred: I’m sorry. It’s a violation. Here’s your ticket, and you’ll be hearing from the Association.

Jean-Luc took the ticket and stomped into the house. If he’d stayed outside, he was afraid he would have dumped the water on Fred.

Baby Elk- Cutie! Updated - WetCanvas

Fred walked back to the cart. They rode in silence for a while. Then they spotted a tent in Ellen Elk’s backyard.

Fred knocked at the door, but there was no answer. Emma wrote a note and taped it to the door:

Dear Neighbor – The tent in your backyard is a violation of Association rules. If you have guests, they are required to stay in your house, not a separate structure. Please remove the tent immediately. Your Friendly Neighborhood Guardians

When Ellen got home, she read the note. Ellen was furious. She called the Association, but no one answered.

Why Your Dog Loves Antlers | HealthyPets Blog

Note: The dog is holding on voluntarily

They knew she had a tent in her yard. She had to pay a $50 permit fee to put it there. No one was living in it. She was going to use it for her daughter’s birthday party.

The golf cart made a few more stops before they went home. They decided not to stop a Josephine’s house to cite her for violets in her yard. They were all afraid of her.

A few days after this round of visits, everyone received a letter. Jim Giraffe was inviting everyone to a meeting to discuss Association rules.

92 Best ANGRY ANIMALS images | Animals, Angry animals, Cats

Next week: Will the Association management side with Fred or the homeowners?

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.