Where we are: Fred Fido and two friends have volunteered to police the subdivision for outside violations of the Association’s code. Some of the other residents think Fred is taking his responsibilities a little too seriously. Jim Giraffe, the Association President, has called for a meeting to discuss the rules. See Part 1 here.
Jim: Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for attending this meeting. We have some important business to discuss.
Al Angora: We certainly do. I want you to put him on a leash.
He points at Fred, who bares his teeth.
Al: Figurative speaking, of course.
Fred relaxes a little.
Jim: Al, those are pretty strong words. Are you sure that’s what you meant to say?
Al: Yes, I’m sure. He got Fluffy crying, and she begged me to come home and cut the grass. It wasn’t even a quarter inch over the required height.
Fred: But you admit that it was too long.
Al arched his back and sat down.
Peppi Pomeranian: I agree with Al. Fred is going too far. I was watering my lawn on the correct day when Fred came by and said that my lawn was wet enough.
Fred: She was wasting water. It was running into the street.
Peppi: That’s because I forgot to turn off the water when you and your crew started yelling at me.
Fred: So you acknowledge that you were wasting water.
Peppi growled and sat down.
Jim: OK. Fred and his friends may have been a little over-enthusiastic. But that’s no reason to be hostile. Remember, he is volunteering his time, and the neighborhood looks a lot better.
Sarah Squirrel: I don’t care. We got a citation for having a lawn ornament. The “ornament” was my mother-in-law sleeping in the sun for a couple of days in a row.
Amelia Alligator: He did the same thing to me about my kids. He said he didn’t know that alligators have to bask in the sun to stay alive.
Ben Bruin: He gave me a noise citation in the middle of the day. My neighbors didn’t call to complain. They know it’s just my natural voice.
The animals started to talk over each other, getting angrier as time went by. It seemed as if Fred had upset everyone in the neighborhood.
Jim: All right, everyone. Let’s settle down so we can discuss this like civilized animals.
Fred: I’m sorry if I offended you. I was just trying to be helpful.
Peppi: You used to be a good dog, Fred. We were buddies.
Amelia: Yeah. You were the first one to welcome us to the neighborhood.
Some of the other animals nodded and shared stories.
Steve Skunk: I agree. But you still have to go. You complained about the smell in the house that was getting outside through the open window. Seriously, Fred? We’re skunks.
Al: Sorry, Fred. I agree with Steve. I want you to find something else to do with your spare time.
Fred’s ears and tail were drooping.
Fred: I guess I need to quit. You’ll have to hire a professional to do the job.
Jim: Wait a minute, Fred. I like your attitude. Let me think of some way we can compromise on this.
The animals groaned and looked at each other.
Al: You better think of something fast, or we’ll get rid of you too.
Next week: Will Jim’s plan work and bring peace to Mountain Valley Estates?
Pictures courtesy of Google Images.
Adventures in Cheeseland 