12

Scrolling Through Animal Twitter

Cat with a cell phone. The cat with a cell phone is on a beach , #Sponsored, #cell, #Cat, #phone, #beach, #cat #ad | Cats, Cat artwork, Funny animals

Before we get started, we would like to thank Oliver at Feline Opines for featuring us on this week’s chat.

Note: We don’t have Twitter. All references are figments of our imaginations and, hopefully, bear no resemblance to reality.

Black Bear

Marley Bear @bearcubmom

Cubs are adorable. And maybe one day, I’ll get all of the berry juice out of my fur. Or maybe I should just try to love purple fur.

Crushed nuts: Photographer captures a family of squirrels in a tree

Sophie Squirrel @squirreljinx

Looking for a roommate. Affordable rates. Must be willing to share tree with extended family and very noisy magpies. Would prefer sound sleeper. Please no raccoons or other creatures of the night.

My mom's 'no cats on the table' rule doesn't get enforced when you're this cute : cats

CatsCatsCats @CatsCatsCats

Read our review of “Cat Table Manners.” It’s another hilarious human book about ways to “train” us. They seem to think that we belong on the floor when the food is on the table.

pictures of unicorns - Google Search | Unicorn pictures, Real unicorn, Magical creatures

UnicornsRReal @unicornsunited

Unity rally taking place 1 pm this Friday at Memorial Park near the gazebo. We will march to City Hall and present our petition for formal recognition as a species. Bring your friends and family. No doubters/haters please.

Cute hedgehogs eating mushrooms | Cute animals, Animals, Animals beautiful

Hal Hedgehog @hoggyhal

Don’t forget Snail Fest this weekend. Fun for the whole family. Games and food for all. Be sure to stop by and try my homemade snail marinade. I’ve been working on it for weeks. My wife says it goes or I do.

Timeline Photos - Amazing World of Animals & Nature | Boxer puppies, Boxer dogs, Boxer puppy

Frankie @therealdealdog

City Council is working to tighten the leash laws again. No pun intended. All you dogs running around loose: get yourselves together. I don’t want to lose my park privileges because you can’t control yourselves.

Persian Cat Names - Over 200 Gorgeous Ideas!

Penelope Persian @genuineamericanbeauty

I can’t believe the humans are thinking about getting another cat! They barely have time to meet my needs. My breakfast was 10 minutes late this morning. And they completely forgot treats yesterday! How are they ever take care of two of us?

cell phone animals - St Mary Anne's Church

All pictures courtesy of Google Images

 

 

24

The RHCCC: Auditions

Image result for maine coons watching

The ladies of the Real House Cats of Crabapple Cove  were working on the annual fundraiser for the Crabapple Cove Center for Abandoned/Feral Cats. Fluffy was in charge of the dinner, and she had asked her friends Miki, Daphne, and Bella to come so she could get other opinions.

Image result for dogs doing tricks

One of the most important things to do was to set up the entertainment. They hadn’t been happy with their choice the previous year. It had been a troupe of dog acrobats. They were recommended by a friend of Bella’s at the library and their videos looked great. The night of the dinner, they told Fluffy that  one of the members was sick and they had brought a backup. The backup dog hadn’t performed in a while and mostly stood on stage looking confused. Several parts of the routine had to be scrapped. It was a disaster.

This year Fluffy had decided to hold live auditions rather than taking a referral. They had narrowed the field to three candidates who looked promising: a singing owl, a pair of ballroom-dancing bears, and a gorilla who played the piano.  

Image result for eastern screech owl cry

First up was the owl. She was smaller than they were expecting. That was a good thing since they did not want to scare the donors with a huge raptor in the house. No one had ever heard an owl sing before, but her video had sounded excellent.

Fluffy: What are you going to sing?

Owl: An owl love song.

Fluffy: Sounds good. Did you bring music?

Owl: No, it’s just me.

Fluffy: You can start whenever you’re ready.

Image result for cats hearing a loud sound

The owl cleared her throat and started making the most horrible sounds they had ever heard.

Bella: That’s worse than any cat fight I’ve ever heard.

Daphne: I’ve never heard anything like that down at the docks either.

Fluffy held up a paw to stop the owl.

Image result for cat talking meme

Fluffy: Honey, what type of owl are you?

Owl: I’m a screech owl. Why?

Fluffy: That singing was pretty bad. Are you sure that’s what you want to sing for an audition?

Owl (flustered): I’ll try another one. It’s an owl folk song.

Image result for cats hearing a loud sound

The cats sat back waiting for a melodic serenade. Instead, they got the same horrible sound as before. Once again, Fluffy held up her paw. 

Fluffy: Sweetie, that just doesn’t sound like the video you sent us. Do you have a sore throat or something?

Owl: Honestly?

Fluffy: Of course.

Image result for cat covering ears

Owl: I really wanted to perform here, so I had a nightingale sing on the video. I thought she would sound better.

Fluffy: That’s definitely true. But you must have known you would have to sing for yourself if you got an audition.

Owl: Yes, but I thought I would sounds better live and you would  like the song.

Fluffy: Let us talk it over. Please have a seat for a moment.

Image result for cats talking to each other

The cats whispered to each other.

Daphne: There is no way I am recommending her. She sounds like she’s getting ready to attack something.

Miki: I agree. She’s scary.

Bella: Sorry, but I can’t listen to her any more. She’s worse than the dogs.

Fluffy called the owl back to the stage.

Image result for frustrated cat meme

Fluffy: I just don’t think it’s going to work out. Some of our guests are pretty sensitive and it wouldn’t be right to have a raptor as our entertainment.

Owl: I understand.

She sadly walked off the stage and out the door. The ladies looked at each other in relief. Hopefully the other two acts would be better.

They were not disappointed. The bears danced a beautiful waltz, and the gorilla played Mozart. It was decision time. With the performers backstage, the cats discussed which one would be better for the dinner.

Image result for gorilla playing piano

Miki: I liked the gorilla. And I don’t think anyone would be intimidated by him.

Daphne: I really don’t think folks will be afraid of dancing bears. They’re very sweet when they talk.

Bella: Do we have enough money to hire both of them?

Fluffy: I could probably make it work. I’ll make up the difference if we’re short.

Daphne: Isn’t that going to be an awfully long program?

Image result for two bears dancing

Once again the cats conferred.

 Miki: I agree that we don’t want it to run to long. Do you think they might work together?

Bella: That’s a great idea.

Daphne: Are you sure you want to do that? They don’t even know each other. It might turn out like last year.

Fluffy: I don’t think we’re going to agree on which one to hire, so let’s see if they’ll work together.

Image result for bear with gorilla

She called all three entertainers back out and explained their idea. The bears and gorilla held a conversation among themselves.

Bear: We think it could work. We would need a recording of what we will be dancing to.

Gorilla: I can provide that. This idea actually is pretty interesting.

The bears nodded.

Bear: We really think it could be impressive.

Image result for bears dancing

They decided on a Strauss waltz. The gorilla sent the bears a recording of him playing the piece. They all got together several times before the performance.

Their hard work paid off. They were wonderful the night of the dinner. The night was a huge success; donors pledged more than they ever had. Afterwards, Fluffy thanked them for their performance.

Image result for thank you cat meme

Fluffy: That was totally pawsome! Thank you so much for helping us out tonight.

Bear: It was our pleasure.

Gorilla: Actually, it worked out so well that we’re talking about working together in the future.

Fluffy paid them, and the three of them walked out together.

Image result for cats watching

RHCCC is supposed to run the second Saturday of the month, but our typist got confused. We bought her a calendar.

All pictures courtesy of Google Images.

20

“And the Home of the Brave (Cat)”

Cats Can Be Your Hero. Cats Who Saved The Humans They Love ...

In honor of the United State’s Independence Day, we were going to tell you about some cats who served in the military. But since there is no record of George Washington having cats with his troops, we decided to look a little farther to see what we could find.

German cats were messengers during the World Wars. And cats are excellent at sniffing out drugs and bombs. But we decided to focus closer to home. We found five cats who displayed great bravery at home.

cats and dogs fighting quotes - Google Search | Cat quotes funny ...

First, we have Tara. She was outside with her small human (4 years old), when he was attacked by several dogs. Without a thought for her own safety, Tara ran into the group of dogs. She hissed, growled, and attacked the dogs until they ran away. The boy ran into the house and is fine. We assume he is now a “cat person” for life.

23 Funny Animal Pictures Of The Day | Funny animal photos, Cute ...

Next we have Jack. Jack is a cat who knows how to protect his turf. When a bear wandered into his yard, Jack was not pleased. He went into full attack mode. Jack chased the bear out of his yard and up a neighbor’s tree. We assume the bear went home and told his friends to avoid the crazy cat’s yard.

Buidling On Fire? Cat Meme - Cat Planet | Cat Planet

Next, we have Baby. Baby’s human parents were sleeping on the sofa when Baby smelled smoke in the back bedroom. She went into the front room and wouldn’t stop crying and pawing them until the humans woke up. Everyone was fine, and the mom had twins a few weeks later. Baby probably doesn’t have to worry about her humans sleeping too soundly anymore.

Cat-tain planet. He's a hero. | Cat memes, Cat pics, Funny cats

Schnautzie started her career as a hero early. When she was just a kitten, she smelled something strange. She went in to wake up her human parents. They were a little difficult to wake up, but she didn’t stop nuzzling them and crying until they wre awake. It was lucky that sh e was so persistent. She saved the family from a possible explosion due to a gas leak. With a little fresh air, the family was fine.

15 Cats Who Are Waking You Up For An Important Task... (Memes) - I ...

Last, but not least, is Pudding. He had just settled in for his first night in his new forever home. Suddenly, his human ,Mom started to act strangely. He didn’t know what was going on, so he went over to his human and tried to make her stop. He was so persistent that she oused herself from a diabetic seizure to call out to her son. He called 911, and she is fine. Puddinghas no worries about ever losing his forever home.

Just thinking about these brave cats makes us proud to be feline. It also makes us very tired.

Exhausted Cat - Tap the link now to see all of our cool cat ...

Pictures courtesy of Google Images. 

15

The Biennial Bears’ Bonfire – Part 4

Romanian specialists teach orphaned bear cubs how to survive in ...

Background: Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. You can read Zeke’s story here. Anthony’s story is here. Joe’s story is here.

This is Benjamin’s story.

Image result for fox chasing rabbit (With images) | Fox, Animals ...

My son Beau and I were out gathering some last minute supplies for the winter when we saw a fox race past chasing a couple of young rabbits. It really didn’t look good for the rabbits. We didn’t have time to see who it was.

The next thing we knew, one of the rabbits was tugging on Beau’s paw. The fox had cornered her brother in some bushes, and she wanted Beau to help him get free. She must have been pretty desperate to come to a bear for help. We didn’t know her, but the forest was full of rabbits.

American Black Bear | MDC Discover Nature

Beau and I looked at each other. I was going to explain that it was probably too late, but she looked so sad that I didn’t have the heart. He was her only family. We told her to wait there, hidden from view, while we went to see what was going on.

We followed the tracks and found the fox. It was Jasper, one of our neighbors. He was still hunting, so the rabbit was alive. I guess we startled Jasper, though. He looked irritated when we approached him. He told us that he had been hunting a rabbit for dinner when we tromped up. Now he probably had lost it.

Red Fox Diet - Hunting Strategies & Behaviour | Wildlife Online

Jasper started to walk around, sniffing. He found the scent of the rabbit again. He ran into the forest. We followed him, and I asked him to stop. He had cornered the bunny, but we startled him before he could attack. Jasper turned his head to look at us.

Before Jasper had a chance to start yelling, I told him that we wanted him to give us the bunny. Jasper thought I had lost my mind. It was his dinner. Besides, bears don’t eat rabbits. Why would we want it?

Wild Baby Bunnies and What To do When You Find Them - Effective ...

I explained that the rabbit’s sister had asked us to rescue him. She didn’t want to lose her only family. Jasper looked at us and started to laugh. He’d never heard of a rabbit being that brave before.

We waited to see whether Jasper would release the rabbit. I wasn’t sure that the poor thing hadn’t died from fright. It had its body pressed against the ground. Jasper looked at the rabbit and decided to let him go. He couldn’t kill something after a story like that. He’d have leftovers for dinner.

Scared little wild rabbit | timeuser | Flickr

The little rabbit was frozen in terror. Beau went over and petted him. There wasn’t any response, so Beau picked him up and we took him back to his sister.

She was exhilarated when she saw us. She had been sure that we had just gone home. The little male rabbit finally relaxed when he saw her.

cuddling rabbits | Two wild rabbits on Haigh Hall golf cours ...

We asked if they needed help getting home. The girl rabbit said that their home had been destroyed; that’s why they were in the area. We decided to take them home with us to relax after all the excitement. They fell asleep almost immediately.

They decided to build their new burrow near our den, since we were the first friends they made in the area.

Waking From Hibernation, the Hard Work of Spring Begins - The New ...

 

13

The Biennial Bears` Bonfire – Part 3

The Black Bears of the Smokies - Mountain Realty Group

Background: Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. It is Anthony’s turn to speak. You can read Zeke’s story here. Anthony’s story is here.

Now it was Joe’s turn to tell his story.

My story is a little different because it’s about a human.

How About No Bear Meme - Imgflip

As you know, they have what they call “hunting season.” They think that as long as it’s the season, they can do whatever they want in our woods. Mainly they seem to tromp around and make a lot of noise. So I hear a couple of them walking around, trying to find whatever it was they were looking for.

Curious Bear by Joe Motohashi | Bear, Bear pictures, Bear photos

They ended up separating to see if they had better luck. I heard a shot, so I assumed they had been successful.

Then I heard one of the humans start yelling. I don’t really understand human very well, so I went closer to see what had happened. One of the humans was bleeding and the other one was leaning over him. My best guess is that the first human got shot somehow.

Petition · Environmental Protection Agency: Change name of a group ...

I thought I should help, so I went closer to offer. I guess it wasn’t a very good idea. The uninjured human tried to shoot me. Luckily, he was a terrible shot. So he started to run.

I couldn’t believe it. He left his friend behind so he could get away. I  guess he doesn’t know black bears are friendly around here.

I looked down at his buddy. He didn’t look so good. I mean humans are kinda funny looking without any fur, but this one looked particularly bad.

10 Philosophical Bears Thinking Deep Bear Thoughts

I didn’t know what to do. On the one paw, he had been out in my woods trying to kill someone. On the other paw, it seemed cruel to leave him there bleeding.

I  decided to drag him over to Dr. Fox. It wasn’t very far, but when the human saw me coming toward him, he fainted. It was a little insulting. After all, he was the one with the gun.

Hey comment a cute fox image if u love foxes | Object Shows Amino

Dr. Fox looked at the human and asked where I found him. I told him the whole story and asked whether he could help the human.

The doctor said that he would clean up the human and pack some herbs into the wound. It had worked on some others patients, but he hadn’t tried it on something so big. It was going to take a lot of herbs. I  said that I would go out and find them while he cleaned up the patient.

Bears Munching on Ants Indirectly Help Plants | Smart News ...

When I got back, it looked like the human was dead. Dr. Fox said not to worry; he had given his patient something to make him sleepy. I had to admit that he did look a lot better cleaned up and sleeping.

I gave Dr. Fox the herbs. He packed the wound with most of them, then made a paste to hold the herbs in place. The doctor asked how I was going to get him home.

Winter Dens - North American Bear CenterNorth American Bear Center

I hadn’t thought about that. I thought he’d be able to go home after Dr. Fox had fixed him. I certainly didn’t want him in my den; he would scare the children. And I had no idea where he lived. Besides, someone would probably try to shoot me again.

I told Dr. Fox that I needed to go home and talk to Ginny (my wife). She said that he could stay overnight, but that was it. We carried him home and made him a nice bed.The kids looked in on him, but weren’t impressed, so they went back to playing.

Pin on Cute <3

We found a phone in his pocket and found a number for “Home.” I couldn’t call them. Most humans don’t understand bear talk. Ginny said we should text them. She sent, “Git me.”

We waited for a response. “Where are you?” Hmm. That was a good question. How would the humans find him? “Lake Vista beach”

Brown bears in Lake Clark National Park, Alaska image - Free stock ...

“I’ll pick you up in the morning.”

We took him over to the lake in the morning and waited with him. A car finally got there, so we waited in the woods. A woman got out of the car and looked at our human. She started crying and called someone. An ambulance arrived a little later. They said they had no idea who would have packed the wound with herbs, but it saved the man’s life.

29 Animals Waving Goodbye For The Winter (With images) | Cute ...

Nexr week: Benjamin’s story

All pictures courtesy of Google Images

18

The Biennial Bears’ Bonfire – Part 2

Background: Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. It is Anthony’s turn to speak. You can read Zeke’s story here.

🔥 Black Bear with a salmon in its mouth : NatureIsFuckingLit

You guys know how much I  like to fish. I’m always the first one out there and pride myself on catching my own. I leave the ones that are already dead for the old guys or someone who has a bad day.

Last fall, something strange began to happen. I’d catch a fish and before I had a chance to get out of the water, this young eagle would grab the fish out of my mouth. The strange part was that as soon as he was away from me, he’d drop the fish.

Grizzly Bear and Bald Eagle (With images) | Bear fishing, Grizzly

The first time, I was annoyed. Stuff like that happens. I caught another fish and went home. The next day was fine, but after that it was a daily occurance.

Bald eagle and brown bear at Katmai National Park | Smithsonian ...

I couldn’t figure out what was happening. Was the poor bird hungry and just not able to hold onto his dinner? Was he incredibly clumsy? It looked like he was doing it on purpose, but that seemed pretty stupid.

I was riding a Washington State ferry when a bald eagle plucked a ...

My son Davey had been pestering me to go fishing. One sunny day, I decided to take him with me. I was teaching him some of the secrets to really good fishing. He was practicing and came up with a really nice salmon. When he turned to show me, that stupid eagle swooped in to grab it.

  How to Survive a Bear Attack: Brown Bears, Black Bears, and Polar ...

I went racing toward the eagle. He was so startled that he missed his target and skidded into the water. I started to laugh. He was fine, but his dignity was suffering.

Eagle and the Bear

I told the eagle that we needed to talk. My son was standing on the side of the river waiting. I told him that I would only be a couple of minutes.

I asked the eagle what he was doing. The eagle explained that it was a game. He was waiting to see how long it was before I got angry. He was pretty sure I’d be able to catch another fish and and not  go hungry.

I told him that he had achieved his goal. I also told him that if he tried it with my son again, he’d better start looking for another river. I think I scared him because I never saw him again.

Too much to bear? Amazing photographs show cub in Russia ...

I caught a fish after that and Davey and I enjoyed a picnic on the sunny river bank. We took a nap in the sun before we went home. The next time we went fishing, I told him show to protect his catch.

Ten Best in 2014 | Bear, Animals beautiful, Brown bear

Next week: Joe’s story.

All pictures courtesy of Google Images

 

 

19

The Biennial Bears’ Bonfire

Every two years Zeke, Anthony, Joe, and Benjamin got together for a week-long camping trip at the lake. One of the highlights of the trip was story-time around the bonfire. Each bear would tell a story about something that had happened to them during the previous two years, based on a given topic. This year’s topic is “Chance Encounter With Another Species”. It was Zeke’s turn to go first.

A Bears Quest for Food | Wise About Bears

My encounter was only a few weeks ago. I was wandering around, looking for berries. I heard a small rustling in one of the bushes. Whatever it was, it had to be small. I couldn’t figure out what kind of little animal wouldn’t be afraid of a bear, especially a full-size size male. Whatever it was, there were berries on the bush and I didn’t want to share them with whatever it was.

Kitten in the bush | Sand cat Sandkatt (Felis margarita) Pho… | Flickr

So I pushed the bush out of the way. I couldn’t believe what was down there. It was a tiny kitten! How would a kitten get there? It was terrified. I didn’t want to scare it anymore, so I sat down. After a while, she stopped shaking and came over to sniff me. I didn’t know what to do. She looked up at me and meowed.

She was so cute. I  reached out a paw and patted her. That was all it took. She started to purr. She climbed into my paw. I put her on my lap. She fell asleep almost immediately. She must have felt safe.

What should I do? I didn’t know anything about kittens. Where was her family? I couldn’t leave her in the woods, but where would she go?

I guess I shouldn’t have worried. When she woke up, she climbed up onto my shoulder. I couldn’t reach her, so I went home. I figured she would go back to her home from there. She climbed down in the den and started to look around. She had no intention of leaving.

I had no idea what to do. I went to Cheri, a lady raccoon I know. She looked a little bit like a cat, so I thought she might know. Cheri said it wasn’t safe to make the kitten leave. She told me that she would find some milk to feed the kitten.

To make a long story short, Kitty decided to adopt me. She follows me everywhere. I think she might think she’s a bear. I taught her how I get insects. Somehow, she learned how to hunt, so she’s eating well. We go to the river together to drink.

Cute video of kitten wrestling with large fish | PoC

She sleeps with me. That took a little getting used to. I was afraid I’d roll over and crush her. She decided that sleeping on me is safest. I think she feels safe with me. I’ve gotten used to having her around and would miss her if she left.

Joe: Where is Kitty now?

Cute little ginger kitten sleeping in gray blanket | Premium Photo

Zeke (embarrassed): I brought a blanket for her to sleep in while I’m with you guys.

Benjamin: She’s here? When do we get to meet her?

Zeke: I didn’t know if you’d want to. I’ll bring her to breakfast. She’ll feel better staying with me.

Our bears and their Habitat - North American Bear CenterNorth ...

Next week: Anthony’s story.

Pictures courtesy of Google Imag

21

Springtime in the Subdivision – Conclusion

Baby Giraffe & Golden Retriever Dog - Best Friends! - Eating ...

Where we are: The residents of Mountain Valley Estates are up in arms about their neighbor Fred’s efforts to keep the neighborhood in compliance with the Association’s rules. His insistence on an overly strict interpretation of the rules has irritated most of his neighbors. They have told Jim, the Association President, that either he gets rid of Fred or they will vote him out of office. You can find Part 1 here and Part 2 here.

The animals have agreed to give Jim two weeks to solve the problem. Toward the end of that time, several of the guys were talking.

People Are Loving The Adventures Of This Hedgehog And Its Bengal ...

Jean-Luc Hedgehog: I haven’t seen Fred of a while. Is he hiding?

Ben Bruin: We were pretty rough on him.

Steve Skunk: Yeah. He was just trying to do his job. And he is our friend.

Al Angora: Maybe. But I get angry when someone makes Fluffy cry.

Henry Goat: Don’t worry guys. He’s OK. He just went to see his brother for the two weeks.

Ben: Good. That will get his mind off what is happening here.

I now call the First Annual meeting of the Unbearably Cute Animals ...

On the promised day, Jim called a meeting to give an update. The animals waited in anticipation.

Jim: Thank you for being here today. Fred and I have come to the decision that he is going to retire.

The animals couldn’t believe what they were hearing. No one really thought that Fred would give up his job.

Amelia Alligator: Did you force him to retire? What’s Fred going to do with his time?

Al:Yeah. I was pretty upset. But I thought you’d be able to come up with some kind of compromise.

GeorgeWBush Library on Twitter: "#ArchivesCUTE First Dog Barney ...

Jim: No, I didn’t fire him. Fred, why don’t you come up here and explain why you are retiring.

Fred: While I was staying with my brother, I did some thinking. I’ve been able to tell that you’re not happy with me. I was going to suggest that we have some meetings to find common ground.

The animals were nodding approvingly, but still wondered how this led to retirement.

Fred: One day, my brother and I went to a diner for breakfast. The waitress and I talked for a long time. We went out that night and were together for the rest of my visit. I’d like to introduce you to the wonderful lady who is going to be my wife. Come on up here, Sweetie.

At first, the animals were stunned into silence. But as the beautiful German Shepard joined Fred, they burst into cheers.

German Shepherd Dog Breed Information and Pictures

Fred: This is Vicki, everyone. She made me the happiest dog in the world when she agreed to marry me.

Steve: But why are you retiring?

Fred: Vicki said that she would make sure I had plenty to do.

Everyone laughed.

Jean-Luc: That’s wonderful, Fred. Congratulations!

Ellen Elk: Congratulations, Fred. But who’s going to make sure the subdivision is going to keep looking good?

German Shepherd memes | Page 2 | German Shepherds Forum

Jim walked back and took the microphone.

Jim: Since I just found out, Fred has agreed to continue until the wedding. Vicki promised to keep him in line.

Everyone laughed again.

Amelia: But what happens after that?

Jim: I’m going to take applications, and the Board will vote on the candidates. We have a month until the wedding.

Accommodating goat gives a chicken a warm roost. | Goats, Farm animals

A few weeks later, Jim called another meeting.

Jim: There were only two applicants interested in the job. The board had an extremely hard time deciding who to choose. So, Emma Chicken and Fred Goat will share the responsibilities. They will write up what they see as violations and give the information to me. At our weekly meeting, the Board will decide whether a letter should be sent to the homeowner.

That decision sounded fair to the animals. Fred’s last month was uneventful. He and Vicki had a beautiful wedding with all of his friends attending.

15 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Adopt A German Shepherd

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

21

Springtime in the Subdivision – Part 2

Protesting Cats | Occupy Cuteness seantrank.com | sean.trank | Flickr

Where we are: Fred Fido and two friends have volunteered to police the subdivision for outside violations of the Association’s code. Some of the other residents think Fred is taking his responsibilities a little too seriously. Jim Giraffe, the Association President, has called for a meeting to discuss the rules. See Part 1 here.

Jim: Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for attending this meeting. We have some important business to discuss.

Al Angora: We certainly do. I want you to put him on a leash.

Angry Dogs Compilation - YouTube

He points at Fred, who bares his teeth.

Al: Figurative speaking, of course.

Fred relaxes a little.

Jim: Al, those are pretty strong words. Are you sure that’s what you meant to say?

Why Do Cats Hiss? | Cuteness

Al: Yes, I’m sure. He got Fluffy crying, and she begged me to come home and cut the grass. It wasn’t even a quarter inch over the required height.

Fred: But you admit that it was too long.

Al arched his back and sat down.

Peppi Pomeranian: I agree with Al. Fred is going too far. I was watering my lawn on the correct day when Fred came by and said that my lawn was wet enough.

Funny Dogs Playing With Hose Compilation - YouTube

Fred: She was wasting water. It was running into the street.

Peppi: That’s because I forgot to turn off the water when you and your crew started yelling at me.

Fred: So you acknowledge that you were wasting water.

Peppi growled and sat down.

Warm weather prompts early alligator appearances in Myrtle Beach ...

Jim: OK. Fred and his friends may have been a little over-enthusiastic. But that’s no reason to be hostile. Remember, he is volunteering his time, and the neighborhood looks a lot better.

Sarah Squirrel: I don’t care. We got a citation for having a lawn ornament. The “ornament” was my mother-in-law sleeping in the sun for a couple of days in a row.

Amelia Alligator: He did the same thing to me about my kids. He said he didn’t know that alligators have to bask in the sun to stay alive.

Meme Maker - everyone-talking-about-cats-and-im-like-bears-are-cool

Ben Bruin: He gave me a noise citation in the middle of the day. My neighbors didn’t call to complain. They know it’s just my natural voice.

The animals started to talk over each other, getting angrier as time went by. It seemed as if Fred had upset everyone in the neighborhood.

Cute animal picture of the day: baby giraffe

Jim: All right, everyone. Let’s settle down so we can discuss this like civilized animals.

Fred: I’m sorry if I offended you. I was just trying to be helpful.

Peppi: You used to be a good dog, Fred. We were buddies.

Amelia: Yeah. You were the first one to welcome us to the neighborhood.

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Some of the other animals nodded and shared stories.

Steve Skunk: I agree. But you still have to go. You complained about the smell in the house that was getting outside through the open window. Seriously, Fred? We’re skunks.

Al: Sorry, Fred. I agree with Steve. I want you to find something else to do with your spare time.

Fred’s ears and tail were drooping.

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Fred: I guess I need to quit. You’ll have to hire a professional to do the job.

Jim: Wait a minute, Fred. I like your attitude. Let me think of some way we can compromise on this.

The animals groaned and looked at each other.

Al: You better think of something fast, or we’ll get rid of you too.

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Next week: Will Jim’s plan work and bring peace to Mountain Valley Estates?

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

15

Show and Tell Surprise – Conclusion

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Where we are: Ms. Beaver’s elementary school class is going to have its first Show and Tell. Mike Moose has told his friends that he has a great idea about what he’s bringing, but he really doesn’t have any ideas. You can read Part 1 here.

Mike got home without any ideas coming to mind.

Mom: Hi, sweetie. How was school?

Mike (gloomily): It was terrible. We couldn’t go outside today, and everyone was really bored. Then Ms. Beaver said that we would have Show and Tell tomorrow to make it better.

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Mom: That’s not so bad. At least you’ll have a better day tomorrow.

Mike: Not really. I want to take something awesome. But I don’t have anything awesome.

Mom: What do you think is awesome?

Mike: I don’t know. Just something that no one else has.

Mike’s mom thought for a few minutes. Then she made a suggestion that Mike really liked. He was excited the next day when he went to school and could hardly wait for Show and Tell. Finally, it was time.

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Ms. Beaver: It’s time for Show and Tell. Who would like to go first?

Everyone raised their hand. Ms. Beaver decided that the only fair way would be to go around the room. The children each showed their item. There were favorite books, pictures of gardens, favorite toys, and a few other things. Finally, it was Mike’s turn.

Mike: I had a lot of trouble deciding what to bring today. Finally, my mom made a really good suggestion. I’d like to introduce you to my grandmother, Joanie Moose.

The children started to giggle. Why would he bring in his grandmother? Was she supposed to be the great idea?

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Joanie: Hello, children. I bet you’re wondering what’s so special about me, aren’t you?

Egbert Bear: No offense intended. We were just wondering why Mike would bring in his grandmother.

Joanie: Mike thought that you might enjoy a story that I have to tell about when I was a young moose.

The children quieted down and listened.

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Joanie: When I was a young moose, I met one of Santa’s reindeer. He wasn’t one of the famous ones. Julius was one of the backups in case someone got sick on Christmas Eve. We went out a few times and had really liked each other.

Finally, he asked me to come home with him and meet Santa and the other reindeer. You can imagine how excited I was. Santa was really nice, just like you hear in the stories. And the reindeer were all kind. It was a wonderful trip.

At the end, Julius asked me to stay with him at the North Pole. I thought about it, but decided that I wanted to be at home with my family. So, I came back down here to Northland. I met Mike’s grandfather and had a wonderful family. But once in a while I think about my visit to the North Pole.

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The children were enthralled. She had met Santa! They asked her a lot of questions until Ms. Beaver said it was time to get back to work, and Joanie went home. After school, the children were still talking about it.

Egbert: Okay, I was wrong. You did have the best Show and Tell.

Joey Hare: Yeah. That was amazing. Maybe sometime we could come over to your house and talk to her some more.

Mike: Maybe. She would probably like that.

The children were still talking about Joanie for several days after that.

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Pictures courtesy of Google Images.