We would lo point out some obvious differences between cats and dogs. Hopefully, you will find this entertaining, but not informative. If any of this information is new to you, we recommend you spend some time volunteering at an animal shelter. Better yet, adopt a shelter animal.
Cats are more flexible.
Dogs are friendlier.
Cats are self-cleaning.
They both want to lay in your lap, regardless of their size.
Cats do not require being walked in the rain.
Cats train their humans; dogs allow humans to train them.
Cats are better at hide-and-seek.
Inspired by some new friends of the family:
(Duke, Georgia, Lily, and Tyler)
Pictures courtesy of Google Images (except the boxers).
Greetings from Snoops and Kommando Kitty. Thank you for joining us for this month’s edition of Cat Forum.
Kommando: When our human sister was here a couple of days ago, she’d really gotten fat.
Snoops: She’s not fat. She’s going to have a baby soon.
Kommando: You mean a little human?
Snoops: It’s like before I had my kittens.
Kommando: You mean they’re going to be put in cages until they’re adopted?
Snoops: No. Humans stay in their own houses.
Kommando: Are they ever going to come over here?
Snoops: Probably. She’s still our sister.
Kommando: That’s true. I’m going to look up babies up on the Internet.
Later
Kommando: Snoops, we have to talk to Mom. I don’t think we want a baby here.
Snoops: What’s the problem?
Kommando: They’re noisy.
Snoops: So what? Most humans make too much noise.
Kommando: No, it’s different. Babies cry and sometimes nobody knows why. So they can’t turn off the noise.
Snoops: I guess we’ll have to find a good hiding spot. We’re used to it being quiet.
Kommando: Plus, they smell really bad sometimes.
Snoops: Why?
Kommando: They don’t use a litter box. They poop and someone has to clean them up.
Snoops: Eww. That sounds terrible. What else?
Kommando: The humans will cuddle with them more than with us.
Snoops: Oh my cats! Think of his poor sis-furs.
Kommando: I know. We get our cuddles from Mom and our human brother, but they won’t have anyone.
Snoops: Anything else?
Kommando: I don’t think so right now. In a little while, it will start to move on its own. Then we need to make sure we’re not around. I don’t want to get sat on while I’m sleeping.
Snoops: We better talk to Mom. She’ll know a good hiding place.
Humans keep getting more and more electronic toys. A lot of them seem to be called “Get off of that” or “You can’t sit there.” They’re taking up more and more of our humans’ time. That’s a bad thing. They’ve even come up with what they call “cat apps” that are supposed to appeal to us. (We think it’s just to keep us occupied so they don’t have to play.)
We’ve come up with a list of questions that you can answer and show to your human.
Do you prefer old television sets or new ones?
There is no doubt that the old ones were far superior to lay on: large heated flat surfaces.
But if you want to watch with a friends, today’s larger screens are a definite plus.
Would you rather lay on a book or a computer while your human is reading/using it?
Books are extremely comfy beds. If you can lay on it while it’s on your human’s lap, you can have comfort and cuddles.
But you can actually help your human on a computer.
Do you like live mice better than computer mice?
Live mice are fun to chase and play with.
Computer mice are easier to catch.
Do you prefer live Cat TV or computer Cat TV?
You never know what you’ll see on live Cat TV.
However, some games are only available on the computer.
Do you like old telephones better than smart phones?
Old phones were better for napping.
With a smart phone, you can screen your calls to avoid talking to that really annoying neighbor.
Do you prefer running for fun or for exercise?
You never know who you might find to play with outside.
Treadmills make excellent beds. (And you can usually avoid being annoyed by your human there.)
Do you prefer games with your human or games with their computer?
Your human will probably have more than one game to play. (But probably will quit before you are done.)
If you can get your human to buy you your own computer, you can play whatever you want, whenever you want.
It’s really up to you how much technology you let into your life. But whatever choice you make, be sure to include your human in the fun.
Humans always talk about how smart dogs are. That’s because dogs are dumb enough to take the humans’ tests. We cats have better things to do with our time.
Our brain structure and folding (that thing that make brains look lumpy) is 90% similar to the humans. We’re not really sure we agree that thinking like humans makes us smart, but they do. We have 300 million neurons (nerve cells) in the part of the brain that controls thinking and decision-making (the cerebral cortex). Dogs only have 160 million neurons. Cats rule.
We Learn the Same Way Humans Do
Cats have what they call procedural learning. We watch and then we do it ourselves. That’s why we can open doors, ring bells, and turning on lights. Generally, we don’t turn lights out (that’s left to our human minions).
We also have what is called object permanence recognition. Just because we can’t see something doesn’t mean we don’t know it’s there. That’s why it’s a really bad idea for humans to hide our treats. We know they’re somewhere, and we will find them.
We totally rock at taking new information and applying it to what we already know. Then we can use what we have learned in new situations. We are extremely intelligent kitties.
We are Smarter than Your Human Baby
We can eat our food by ourselves within a few weeks of being born. Your baby needs to be fed for an extended period of time.
There is no question that we are cleaner than your baby. Your baby doesn’t care what they look like or what they are covered in. We wouldn’t dream of going out without being fully groomed. And we bathe ourselves.
We are capable of catching our own food. When was the last time you saw a human baby catch a mouse for dinner?
We Train our Humans, They Don’t Train Us
We do what we want to do, when we want to do it. We have our humans trained to feed us, cuddle us, and clean up after us. They play when we want to. A few purrs and cute looks, and they are wrapped around our paws.
So stand tall, fellow cats. We are the superior beings.
Pictures courtesy of Google Images.
(We just passed 1,000 followers. Thank you all very much.)
Greetings. Snoops and Kommando Kitty here with another edition of Cat Forum. To be perfectly honest, we have been too hot to really do anything this week, so we thought about writing about how hot we are. But that would be boring since everyone else is hot too.
Instead, we did some research on how to keep cool. Some were pretty basic like never let your human lock you in a hot car or stay out of the sun as much as possible. But some made more sense, so we’re sharing those. (If you’re one of those kitties who like to swim, that is another option.)
Enjoy ice treats – We were really excited because we thoug it they might have recipes for mousesicles or moths on ice. No such luck. It’s pretty much licking ice balls. Maybe you could ask your human to add tuna juice. Sometimes Mom adds ice cubes to our water fountain.
Play with ice cubes – We don’t really understand this suggestion because the “experts” also say we should limit play during the hottest part of the day. You need a hard surface to do this game. It may cool off your front paws which could make you feel cooler.
(Yes, it’s an actual cooling bed you can get from AliExpress)
Lay on a cooling mat – You will need to talk to either your human or Alexa to get one of these. You can cool the whole side that is laying on It. It’s like an electric blanket for the summer. We do not recommend lying in ice cubes
Wrap yourself in wet towels or have your human stroke you with wet hands – This one sounds a little icky to us. But it probably works if you don’t mind your human wiping their hands on you like you’re a towel.
Have your human brush you daily – Hopefully, you already have your human trained to either brush you daily or on command. Loose furs can get trapped in your coat and add to the heat of the season. Besides, we all look even more beautiful freshly brushed.
Elevate your bed – It’s a good idea to sleep where the air can circulate below you as well as around you. We recommend a shelf on a cat tree in the shade as a good possibility. If your human has a shelf that is open to air flow, that is another choice. Make sure you have cleared it before you try to sleep.
Get a personal fan – Once again, you will need your human’s help. A fan is one of those things where the blades go around an make a breeze. Be sure that your fan is large enough to cool the air, but not so large that it ruffles your furs. Never put your paw near it. It’s your human’s job to turn it on and adjust it.
Close the drapes – Unfortunately, when you’re too hot, it’s no time to sleep in sun puddles. The direct sun will make you even hotter. So stake out a spot in a nice shady spot and sleep in comfort. The heat wave will end eventually, and you can return to sun worship.
And one final word – Hydrate! Drink as much water as possible to keep your insides and outsides healthy.
Hello, dear readers. Once again we will dive into my trove of your questions to give guidance on today’s most vexing questions.
Dear Tabby – My human has been at home forever (it seems). She interrupted my naps with all her noise from working. I had been really looking forward to her return to work (whatever that means). Yesterday, I heard her tell someone that she was going to be working at home all the time! My routines are going to be permanently ruined and I’m never going to regain what’s I’ve lost missing my beauty sleep. What do I do? Sleepy Siamese
Dear Sleepy – You have a serious problem there. I think that you need to find a fairly quiet spot and stake it out. Then make as much noise as you possibly can. Howl, knock things over, whatever it takes. Eventually she will shut the door and you can sleep in peace. If you do this for several days running, your problem will probably disappear.
Dear Tabby – My human finally went back to work. While she was home, she rearranged all of the furniture in my hangout. (She calls it her office.) She moved my cat tree away from the window. I have missed two months of Cat TV. She says the light is better there, so her desk is where my tree should be. Now she says the move is permanent. What should I do? In the Dark
Dear Dark – You must replace your cat tree with her desk. Claim a spot for yourself next to the window and spend as much time as you can in that space. If she tries to move you, turn on your “cat gravity” and make yourself extremely hard to move. If she tries to kick you out, howl until she gives in. Eventually you will find that your cat tree is next to the desk by the window, and Cat TV has returned.
Dear Tabby – I have been an only cat for two years. It’s been great. I had the humans wrapped around my paw. The other day they brought home a kitten. I couldn’t believe it. Now they’re all tied up with the intruder and aren’t paying nearly enough attention to me. What should I do? Suddenly Old
Dear Old – You have to make friends with the kitten. Soon the two of you will be able to plot against the humans. If they get mad, the kitten can put on her “cute face” and all will be forgiven. Make sure that each of you bond with a different person. That way, there will never be agreement on who’s the “good kitty” and who’s the troublemaker. You never win a fight with a kitten, but you can make sure they grow up to be a real cat.
Dear Tabby – My human has taken away my never-ending supply of kibble because a relative told her I weighed too much. A relative, not my doctor! Now I get a tiny bowl, once a day. She’s trying to starve me to death, I know it. She also changed the brand. She says it’ll help me “maintain a healthy weight.” I am soo hungry. What should I do? Hungry John
Dear Hungry – I see three options. The first is to catch additional food to eat. Most neighborhoods have a good-size supply of rodents. My favorite solution is to “share” with the humans while they’re not looking. You have to be fast, but you will get pawsome treats. If you can get the refrigerator open, you get to choose from the best of their food. Finally, you can make their lives miserable by moping and moaning until they get the hint. Hacking up a hairball after eating will add to the scene.
Mom is always writing about how cats lead ultra-exciting lives – living with bears or saving human lives. We want to set the record straight. She has done absolutely nothing to make our lives that interesting.
Here is a summary of a typical day. (Mom works at night.)
9pm kicked out of bed by the alarm – it is loud.
9:35 after MAYBE receiving a few cuddles, Mom leaves us alone. (The young male human is in the house, but we almost never see him.)
Chase each other around, get a snack of kibble and water, maybe play with some toys.
Go to sleep.
6am go on alert for Mom
7:30 breakfast, litter box break
Sit with Mom while she eats and does computer stuff. Fight to get the closest seat.
9am go to bed with Mom
1pm Watch Cat TV
3pm cuddle with Mom, play games, maybe chase
5:30pm join humans for dinner, share if it’s something we like
6:30pm pre-work nap with Mom
REPEAT
There is some variety:
Visit the inside porch
Hang out under the fan
Kibble and litter breaks
Bathing
Play.with the young male human
Chase mice or bugs
Other stuff we can’t remember
But Mom has never brought home a wild animal or taken us anyplace interesting. We think she makes all that stuff up.
All pictures not of us are courtesy of Google Images
Greetings from Snoops and Kommando Kitty. Welcome to Cat Forum. We received a suggestion about doing a four-hour documentary on kibble. Unfortunately, we were not able to find much information on kibble. It figures. Most of the writers were human.
.So we decided to look into cat food in general. The story really begins in the middle of the nineteenth century. Prior to that, cats were popular for rodent control. Many farmers used milk and meat to attract cats and keep them happy.
Things got a little weird early on once the humans decided to start making food for us . A man decided to make dog biscuits to sell. They were made out of compressed beet root, other vegetables, meat, and wheat. Some people thought they would be good food for cats as well. We disagree.
Small businesses began to sell their own brands of cat food. It was mainly horse meat. Apparently there were a lot of dead horses. Only rich cats got to eat store food in this era.
Not all prepared food was created equal . The government set up the Association of Feed Control Officials in 1909. In 1917, they created rules to standardize the creation of cat food and create minimum health standards.
Don’t worry fellow felines For once it wasn’t a case of species-ism on the part of the humans. Their prepackaged food was at least as bad. At least we consider rats part of a balanced diet.
Now it gets weird again. Some human was watching a machine make cheese puffs (a tasty human treat that does not use cheese). He decided to use the machine to make cat food. And that was the beginning of kibble.
At this point, most cats went outside at least part of the time. Any problems with the quality of the food could be supplemented with nature’s buffet.
A smart human found out that people were willing to spend more money to get better quality food for their furry friends. A man named Paul Iams created the first meat-based, high-protein food for cats.
As the humans say, the rest is history. Today there are shelves in the store dedicated to cat food. In decent stores, there is one aisle for the dry food and one for canned food and treats.
Humans can go one their computers and find all kinds of food and treats for us. Of course, we still need to let them know what is acceptable and what is not. Naturally, their palates are not refined enough.
Greetings. Snoops and Kommando Kitty. here. Welcome to this month’s edition of Cat Forum. We are very pleased to have as our guest a friend of our human brother, Bert the Tuxie. He is going to display some common cat behaviors and explain their meanings. Bert believes in demonstrating his examples; he is a cat of few words. He will be happy to address any questions you may have.
(Talk to the paw)
Snoops: Hello, Bert. We’re so happy to finally meet you.
Bert: The pleasure is mine.
Snoops: I’ll turn things over to you.
Bert: Thank you very much. As every cat knows, humans do not really understand any cat dialect, regardless of what they claim. You have probably had the experience of asking for a particular type of food only to have your human say something like, “Be patient. I’ll feed you in a few minutes.” Some humans are no better at reading our expressions and/or body language. It can be extremely frustrating.
I have a totally pawsome human, but even so, sometimes I have to look at him and wonder, “Are you paying any attention at all?” I imagine that some of you have this problem more than others.So let’s get to work.
This pose is the one we use when we’re giving you permission to rub our tummies. Some humans would have you believe that no cat likes to have their tummy rubbed. Humans, proceed with caution the first time in case your kitty is showing trust rather than a desire to be petted. Pet gently, we keep food in there and would like to keep it there.
Just because we’ve allowed you the pleasure of rubbing our tummy, does not mean that you can do it forever. This face indicates that you have overstayed your welcome and need to find something else to do for me
.
If you see this face, it means that you have been annoying and need to stop whatever you have been doing. It can also mean that you are being especially human. Meaning that we understand what you are doing, but there is a much better way to do it if you would only listen to us.
This behavior means that I am enjoying my toy and you should go away.
I will look like this if I’ve enjoyed a little too much ‘nip. Humans: Do not share it on Instagram, Facebook, or anywhere else.You have been in the same condition, and I did not make fun of you.
This look should be understood by all humans. I am questioning why you would think that this food is acceptable and you need to fix the situation. Do not give a solid lump of food; I can’t cut it up is one possibility. Or maybe, I don’t recognize this smell. Are you sure it’s edible?
This look can be interpreted as either “What did you bring me?” or “I want what you have or I want to be offered so I can turn it down.” Humans don’t ever seem to learn that they can’t tell us that we won’t like something. We don’t trust humans to know our palates and want to be sure.
These last few pictures are just to remind you how overwhelmingly cute cats are.
I hope that you have enjoyed my presentation. Let Snoops and Kommando Kitty know if you have questions. I’ll be happy to answer them for you.
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Adventures in Cheeseland 