(Kommando and Snoops woke up Monday morning starving as usual. Snoops went over and woke up Kommando.)
Snoops: Hey! Why isn’t there any food? Didn’t you wake up the humans? You know that’s your job. It’s already light outside.
Kommando: Bad news. Remember when they got in the car yesterday? They never came home. They aren’t anywhere in the house.
Snoops: Oh no!! I wonder if something happened to them? Who’s gonna feed us and take care of us? I am NOT going back to that shelter. They stuck me in a cage and all I could smell was dogs. And there is no Cat TV. And the food was awful!
Kommando: What about me? This was my only home. I was left at the side of the road.
Snoops: Don’t panic! It’s not a crisis yet. We still have dry food and water.
Kommando: I have a great idea!! We could use that computer thingy and order out.
Snoops: That is a great idea! And we can look for new humans too. When it gets cold again we’ll need someone to snuggle up against.
Kommando: OK, Snoops, you’re the one who spends all the time in here. What do we do first?
Snoops: Well, the first thing Dad does is push in that button. (points to “ON” switch).
Kommando: Oof (pushes with her whole body). Maybe it’s stuck. Mrrrrow! (Falls over as the computer turns on.)
(Hear somebody at the back door.)
Kommando: Run! That’s not our humans.
Male Voice: Here kitty, kitty. I’m here to feed you while your humans are out of town.
(Cats look at each other.)
Snoops: What do you think?
Kommando: Anyone could come in and say that. Maybe he wants to kidnap us and sell us to rogue Canadians to use as sled dog trainers.
(Snoops stares at Kommando.)
Kommando: What? It could be true.
(They hear a can of food being opened and sneak forward.)
Kommando: He doesn’t look too dangerous.
Snoops: Naw, I’ve seen him with the beta male. Just watch out for his feet.
Male: Oh there you two are! Here’s your food. I’ll change your water too.
Kommando: Should we trust him?
Snoops: I’m hungry! And he’s feeding us the right stuff. I’m eating.
(Runs over and starts to scarf down the food. Kommando sniffs her food and begins to eat.)
Kommando: Yumm! It’s our food. We won’t starve.
(They don’t notice the male leaving. The next day he appears about the same time. They greet him at the door, meowing.)
Male: Hi, cats! How’ve you been?
(Kommando rubs her head against his leg.)
Male: You’re so cute. No wonder your humans said they’d miss you while they were gone. They’ll be back in a couple of days.
(Snoops and Kommando look at each other. They wait until the male humans leaves.)
Snoops: They’re coming back! They’ll probably bring treats to make up for leaving us. I wonder where they went.
Kommando: Who cares? We should have a party to celebrate!
Snoops: Great idea! You send out the KittyChat, and I’ll check out what’s in the refrigerator and cupboards. Tell them to bring their own milk if they want it.
Snoops: Kommando, how many people did you send that KittyChat to?
Kommando: Just our mailing list.
Snoops: Then why did so many cats come?
Kommando: Ummm – Well, I did tell them they could bring a friend if they wanted. I wanted to make sure they knew they could bring their mates. And I did tell them it was going to be awesome because the humans were out of town.
Snoops: We don’t know a gang of alley cats. There aren’t any alleys around here.
Kommando: They said you were cage-mates at the shelter. At least everyone’s gone before the neighbors saw.
Snoops: This place looks awful. We need to clean it up.
Kommando: Why? Most of the damage is outside. We don’t go outside. They’ll think raccoons did it.
Snoops: What about the house?
Kommando: They didn’t clean before they left. They’ll just think we did the rest because we thought they deserted us.
Snoops: You’re smarter than you look. Let’s take a nap.