19

Thunder Katt: Fun with Your Human

We’d like to welcome our cousin Thunder back for this week’s post.

Hello everyone! It’s Thunder, and today I’m going to be giving you ideas on what you and your human companion can do for fun and bonding during the heatwave months of summer!

As some of you may recall, I am a Michigan kitty. In the winter, spring, and fall, this is excellent, because it’s typically cool enough to cuddle and nap all day, and there’s always something on Cat TV! Unfortunately, from about mid-May to mid-September, we have summer. As I discovered, summer is hot, humid, sticky, and gross. This leads to my humans whining that it’s too hot to cuddle (obviously they’re wrong, but have you ever tried correcting a human?) and even to Cat TV being put on pause due to rain storms. It’s an overall sucky season! Thankfully, there are still things to be done to ensure both you and your human are entertained. 

Play hide and seek

This is inspired by my sister, Angel. It works similar to the human kitten version of the game. Basically, while your human is distracted, decide where you’re going to hide (some favorite spots for us include behind the stove, under the sofa, and behind the laundry facilities). Then, when your human is in another room, stealthily position yourself in your spot. It’ll take a couple of minutes before your human realizes it’s game time, so you may be able to get a nap in. Once your human misses you, the fun begins! Watch in amusement as they search for you. Make sure you ignore their calls of “here, kitty!”, and only come out if a litter break is needed or if rare treats are offered. When they find you, simply choose a new spot and start over!

Hunting practice 

Tired of your human losing the best mice you found? Take the off mousing season to practice hunting with them! Our favorite targets are stink bugs, spiders, flies, and moths. The first couple of targets you’ll have to demonstrate how to catch the prey, but after the first 10 or so, give your human a chance (just be sure to be ready to swoop in and make the kill. Humans need a lot of support). Also, make sure they’re not afraid of the target you chose for them. We decided to let Mom go after a huge moth, but apparently she’s terrified of them, so it led to her sitting on the sofa crying while Dad chased and captured it. We thought it was funny. They did not. 

Start a collection together 

You can piggyback off your hunting practice, or you can choose a totally inanimate object to collect together. Some personal choices for us include stink bugs and flies (that’s a pure Thunder K. Katt choice!), pacifiers (human kitten just spits them out, and they’re fun to bat around), hair ties, lip balm tubes, and bath poufs (Onyx is obsessed with them. We just let her be). If your human is actually organized and keeps things tidy, try helping them collect pens, rubber bands, paper, and shopping receipts. Should your human attempt to clean up your collection, simply take it back out and drop it in a more pertinent spot for them (such as their pillow). They’ll catch on eventually, and hopefully start adding pieces of their own. If you need an easy starter, try toy mousies or balls. They’ll think it’s cute and be more likely to participate. 

Do food and beverage tastings 

Apparently humans have a thing called “wine tastings”, and in addition to the wine, there’s often cheese, olives, and nuts. Because wine, olives and nuts are not cat friendly (and we all know cheese is delicious- no sample needed on that), I would advise a slightly different approach. Find a cat friendly food that you normally would avoid, and give it a couple nibbles. I’ve tried lettuce, Angel has tried oatmeal, Onyx tried a quinoa chip, and all of us have tried butternut squash. In return, try offering your human some catnip or silver vine, or even some wet food gravy. Make sure you clean your palate between tastings by using their water glass. And always request extra ice, it helps you stay cool in the heat. 

Lounge

I’ve found that humans tend to lounge under a fan or in front of the air conditioner when they get hot. What a purrfect opportunity to lounge next to them, tummy side up, and allow them to enjoy your company! They won’t complain about you making them hot, you’ll get tummy rubs and attention, and the fan will also cool you off. Please note that some humans are not good at just laying there, so you may have to demonstrate a few times prior to any big successes. 

Invite your human to watch Cat TV 

This is contingent on storms and rain not ruining the cat TV channels (Michigan has been horrible about that this year). The best way to do this is to find the largest window in your house. Choose your spot first (feel free to nudge things around as needed), and create a spot for your human. Once you find a good show, start meowing loudly and often, until a human comes by. At that point, grab them with your paw and pull them towards you and the show. Hopefully you can enjoy a nice bird or squirrel show together. 

Do computer work together 

When your human is on the computer, be it shopping, work, or video watching, join in on the fun! You can plop in front of their screen, sit on the keyboard, play with their mouse, or help organize their desk area. Some kitties prefer to walk back and forth, which is a good option if you need attention and they have a deadline to meet. Some more technology-savvy kitties may be able to operate functions on the computer for their human- I can open new pages, adjust text size, and unmute the volume. If your human gets irritated, I would choose to sit on their wrist while they type or navigate the mouse. Out of the way, but still with your human (this trick was taught by Onyx).

Massages

This is a very literal you scratch my back, I scratch yours situation. Approach your human wanting pets. After an appropriate amount of petting (make sure not to sit down and get comfortable), either jump on and off of them really fast, keep walking back and forth across them, or stand (don’t sit) on a pressure point and purr (you can toss in some head bonks if wanted). Keep up this pattern until they’re satisfied with their cat massage, or until you find something better to do. An added benefit for you is the likelihood of loose, itchy furs being removed during the petting process. Don’t be alarmed if your human yelps a little during their massage- it’s the tension leaving them. 

Hopefully you and your human can have an enjoyable summer together! Stay safe, stay cool, and enjoy the time with your human. Don’t let the rain get you down, and keep your furs cool and brushed. And remember, cuddle weather will be back before you know it! 

Furs and purrs,

Thunder K. Katt

ass

14

The RHCCC: Mousing School

4 Ways To Get Into 'Back To School' Mode With Your Cat - CatTime

When we introduced the Real House Cats of Crabapple Cove, you might recall that Daphne works on the docks. She is a crew chief in charge of vermin control.

The Maine Coon Cat

Crabapple Cove is a hot tourist destination, and every summer the businesses hire extra staff to deal with the crowds. The owners all like to have at least a couple of mousers on staff as a guard against anything stealing the food or scaring the guests. It was a great job for kids on summer break.

Daphne noticed that a lot of the young cats didn’t last long on the job. When she asked around, she found out that they really didn’t understand what the job of mouser entailed. Sensing an opportunity, she decided to open a small mouser school at her house. Her first class had four students. It didn’t take long to find the issues.

Teacher Cat (@realteachercat) | Twitter

Daphne: Hi! I’m Daphne. Welcome to Mousing 101. Please introduce yourselves and tell us why you’re here.

Tyler: My mom said I had to get a summer job.

Mindy: Molly and I want to work on the docks. It’s the best place to meet cute guys when they first get here.

Molly (giggling): Yeah. Less competition than in town.

26 Funny Mafia Cat Pictures. | Cat island, Cat island japan, Cat pics

Daphne: It’s hard work on the docks. Have either of you two moused before?

Mindy and Molly looked at each other.

Mindy: Isn’t that why we’re here?

Molly: My mom doesn’t let mice in our house. She says they’re disgusting.

Daphne looked at the final young cat.

Joseph: I think that all cats should know how to mouse, and I never had a chance to learn.

Why Does My Cat Pounce?

Daphne: Okay, class. First, I’ll demonstrate the proper form. You listen carefully. When you think you hear something, get into your pounce stance and wait patiently. Don’t move until you see the target and think you have a good jump on it. You don’t want to spend a lot of energy running around if you don’t have to.

Daphne crouched into the correct position and sat. 

Daphne: Okay, everyone try the position.

Exercise for your cat - PDSA

The young cats mimicked her crouch. Daphne stood in front and looked at them. She didn’t say anything. A few seconds passed.

Molly: How long do we have to sit like this? It’s boring.

Daphne: You have to wait until the mouse appears.

Molly: You didn’t say anything about waiting for a mouse.

Daphne sighed.

What to Do When Your Cat Brings You a 'Gift'

Daphne: Okay. It looks like everyone gets the concept. I’m going to release four mice somewhere in the room. You need to listen for one of them, then practice your pounce. Do NOT hurt the mouse. We are practicing.

Tyler: I can’t eat my mouse? Why should I bother catching it?

Daphne: These are special mice who have been trained to help teach you. They’re not a snack.

Mindy: Thank goodness. I don’t like the taste of mice.

Lonely Cat On The Dock - Stock Video | Motion Array

Joseph: Are you sure you want to work on the dock? I don’t think they practice catch-and-release with what they find.

Mindy: I only want to work there until I find a boyfriend.

Joseph: Maybe you can get a job sitting there looking pretty. That way they won’t miss you when you quit.

Daphne: All right. I released the mice behind the walls. Everyone find a mouse.

The young cats stalked around the room listening carefully. One by one, they found a mouse to concentrate on. Each cat sat patiently waiting for their mouse to appear. Joseph pounced first and came up with the mouse in his mouth.

Funny Cat and Mouse Videos | Tom and Jerry Real Life Best funny - YouTube

Daphne: Excellent form! You’re a natural. You can let your mouse go.

Joseph released the mouse and thanked Daphne. He went to sit on the sofa and wait for the other cats. Molly was the next one with a mouse. She dropped it, and held it with her paw.

Daphne: Pawsome! You’ll be fine working as a mouser.

Molly joined Joseph on the sofa just as Mindy came up with her mouse. As soon as Mindy tasted the mouse, she dropped it and cried.

Mindy: Eww! That’s disgusting! How can you cats stand to have those in your mouths.  Blech!!

A man was mowing his front yard when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went str… | Laughing cat, Laughing animals, Laughing pictures

Daphne started laughing. The other cats joined in.

Daphne: Mindy, I’m afraid you’re going to have to find a different line of work. You are definitely not cut out to be a mouser.

Mindy: Fine. This is revolting. I’m don’t want to date any cat that’s impressed by this.

karen (Woodside, NY)'s review of I Could Pee On This: And Other Poems By Cats

Mindy jumped up on the sofa to watch Tyler. He seemed to be having trouble locating his mouse. Suddenly, the mouse ran out past him. Tyler took off after the mouse only to lose him in a corner. Tyler waited a while longer, but the mouse didn’t reappear.

Tyler: This is stupid. I’m not going to wait all day for some stupid mouse to come out. I’ll find a job doing something else.

Mindy: Me too. Let’s get out of here.

Tyler and Mindy left together.

PsBattle: Two cats walking side by side | Cute cats, Pretty cats, Pets

Daphne: Molly and Joseph, you did excellent work today. I’d like to invite you both back next week for a follow-up lesson in stalking.

Both cats nodded their heads. They left together talking excitedly about how much more fun it was to catch a mouse than they thought it was going to be.

Two Cats Cuddle While Walking Together and the Internet Can't Handle It

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

 

18

Snoops’ Guide to Happy Hunting

Greetings! Snoops here. Kommando has decided to take the week off, so I thought that I would share some hunting tips with you. As most of you know, I am an indoor kitty so the live action will be limited to mice and bugs. However, I do have the inside scoop on the red dot, as you’ll see below.

19 Cat And Mouse Friends Examples That Will Make You Believe In Love Again  | Cats, Cute animals, Funny animals

Catching Mice

We live in an old farmhouse, so the mice were here before I was. Mom can’t stand the idea of traps, so I do my best to keep the population under control.

Patience is the key to any successful mouse hunt. The humans used to laugh when I sat staring at the walls, but now they say that I’m on “Mouse Patrol.” I try to patrol the pantry when no one is around. There is nothing worse than being on the verge of flushing out a tasty treat, then having some human come in because they “forgot to grab the pasta.” Sheesh.

Lolcats - mouse - LOL at Funny Cat Memes - Funny cat pictures with words on  them - lol | cat memes | funny cats | funny cat pictures with words on

I like to hunt alone. Kommando likes to participate in the chase aspect. I can let her do the initial flushing out. But if she gets too involved in the actual hunt, she turns it into a game. Then I either spend hours trying to corner the mouse or it gets away completely. What a waste – no snack and no trophy.

I’m torn on the whole eat or share issue. I used to give all of my dead mice to the humans. (They are really bad hunters.) But they throw the mice away which is a real waste. On the other hand, mice are not as tasty as kibble or my wet food. And it is always entertaining when they find my gift.

11 Bugs to Watch Out For If You Have Pets

Insects

I’m not sure what happened, but we don’t get anywhere close to as many bugs in the house as we used to. Mom works overnight, so the moths don’t come around since there aren’t any lights on. Ants are boring, and I don’t like the way they taste. Our human brother takes care of the stinging insects. (Thanks!)

Tired of insects? A perfect non-toxic insect/bug exterminator: the cat! ( insect vs cats compilation) - YouTube

That only leaves the occasional creepy-crawly or fly. Flies are tough. You have to catch them mid-air, so planning is vital. You need to decide ahead of time whether or not you want them as a snack. If so, a direct paw-to-mouth action is required. Catch-and-release is much easier. Creepy-crawlies are easier to catch, but you have to be careful because a lot of them bite or taste bad.

Overall, I think insects are a waste of time. I think humans should dispose of them. Maybe we just don’t get the right kind of bugs.

Why Do Cats Bunny Kick? | Hill's Pet

Wand Toys

Wand toys are a lot of fun if you don’t have a sister cat who always takes over the game. You should try to identify which human is least likely to play for a couple of minutes and get bored. There is nothing worse than getting all revved up to play just to have your human suddenly find something else to do.

4 Simple DIY Pet Toys for Dogs and Cats | SPOT Pet Insurance

Be sure to give the toy time to get set. Jumping too soon can take all the challenge out of the chase. And don’t play with it too long after you catch it or your human will use that as an excuse to do something else.

Try not to chew through the string. Kommando is really bad about this. We only have one wand toy and it’s not the kind that retracts because Mom refuses to buy any more of those. She’s says they’re a waste of money because they only last one session. Some cats!

The Best Of The "Restraining Cat" Meme | Funny cat pictures, Cat memes,  Funny animal pictures

Red Dot

As promised, I have discovered a secret about the red dot: it’s part of a human conspiracy! Mom’s uncle was over and he was playing with us. He said that he was controlling the dot! Sure enough, he could turn it on and off. And he kept me from being able to catch it. He was entertaining himself at my expense.

My advice is to enjoy chasing the dot. But you will probably never be able to catch it because the humans don’t want you to catch it. So think of it more as a way to get rid of extra energy or a bad case of the zoomies.

Why Does Your Cat Bring You Gifts? - The Conscious Cat

Stuffed Toys

Stuffed toys may be the best to hunt. Especially if you can train your human to hide them for you. And the best part is if you give your “kill cry” with a realistic toy. It is a lot less work for the same reaction.

Pictures courtesy of Google Images (except me!)

24

Notes from Snoops and Kommando Kitty

Greetings from Snoops and Kommando Kitty. It’s been a while since we’ve written a post ourselves, so we thought we’d share some thoughts. It’s been really hot here, and the house doesn’t have air conditioning, so there won’t be anything too exciting.

Our human brother finished our catio a few weeks ago. We were just getting used to it when the heat set in. Mom has refused to install a fan, so it’s a little humid at the moment. Now we need to get them to reroute the traffic. It’s pretty quiet most of the time, but there’s something called “rush hour” when cars use the road.

Cat TV hasn’t been as interesting as we hoped. Mom doesn’t have a bird feeder in the summer because she can’t keep the squirrels out long enough for the birds to get to the food. We don’t really understand why she can’t just feed the squirrels. They’re fun to watch too. We have seen a couple of hummingbirds. Maybe we could get her a book on how to attract really interesting stuff. Perhaps a wildebeest.

Mom seems to be a little on edge lately. We’ve been trying to help her watch videos to relax, but she has really bad taste (they’re all about humans). Then she gets upset when we stop the video or stand in front of it to keep her from seeing what is going on. Maybe we should get our own Netflix account. That way we could find the good stuff for her.

Our human nephew is getting bigger – and louder. We’ve never been around small humans before and hope that Mom doesn’t intend to make any permanent additions to the household. There doesn’t seem to be a mute button on him the way there is on the computer and television.

We’re rather disappointed. We keep hearing about cicadas, but still haven’t seen any. The ants that have gotten into the house are boring. The humans saw recipes online, so they must be good for snacking. They don’t let any other insects in here to chase, but there’s supposed to be a lot of cicadas so maybe a few can sneak in.

Our human brother has been cleaning out the pantry. He says he’s going to make it easier for Snoops to catch any mice that get in there. We’re looking forward to whatever he comes up with. In the meantime, he’s unearthed some treats that got buried. We’ve decided that he can be pretty useful, and we should keep him around.

 

Have you guys been shedding extra this year? We got rid of our winter fur a few weeks ago, but the heat wave seems to have released a new bunch. We don’t really mind, but Mom says that fur in her face is more annoying in the humidity than the rest of the year. Like we said, she’s seemed a little grumpy lately. (Probably the heat.)

That’s it for us. Hope everyone’s having a good summer so far. Purrs and head rubs.

 

16

Critter Cove HS Graduation Day – Part 2

16 Cats-Graduation Day... ideas | cats, cats and kittens, feline

Where we are – Suzy and her friends are getting ready to graduate from high school. You can find Part 1 of the the story here.

Principal Atkins gave a short welcome to the graduation ceremony, and explained the order of events. First up was the class president to give a retrospective of their years together.

Education | New York Au Pairs

The background screen lit up with scenes from their time together at Critter Cove. Suzy was surprised at how young everyone looked at the beginning. And goofy. Had it really been that long?

There was the first Homecoming Dance. Too bad the football team had lost 67-0. And it poured. And a fight broke out between the girls on the Homecoming Court. She had forgotten about someone stuffing the ballot box.

Diego Braghi: Tiger roar paralyzing power

Finally they got to Senior Prom. How beautiful everyone looked. Except that kid that almost got eaten by the tiger. He and his date looked pretty stressed.

Fancy Otter : Otters

The valedictorian’s speech was next. He was a handsome otter named John who was headed to a local industrial school. Suzy knew that Liza was still hoping he’d notice her before he left for school. Not likely; he was the most introverted otter anyone had ever met.

Suzy was daydreaming through the speeches. Who would have thought that these people who were so interesting in person would be so boring when they gave a speech? Before she knew it, it was time to line up for the procession.

horses wearing shoes | Famous After I Die Art & Digital Blog

They had practiced the procession several times at school. The teacher who was running things kept telling them to walk lightly; they didn’t want to sound like animals on the stage. Liza and Suzy thought it was pretty ridiculous. After all, they were cats. And some of the other kids had hooves.

They got to watch things on a closed-circuit TV. The principal started alphabetically, and it was going pretty smoothly until

“Scott Balinski”

Twin cats that have mirrored fur patterns of each other : interestingasfuck

Someone looked a little confused at the side of the stage, so Mr. Atkins motioned him forward. Sean Balinski took the diploma holder and smiled. How could they have forgotten his name? Everybody knew Sean and his twin Mike who had been unable to graduate due to academic probation. It had been the hot topic for the past month.

At last it was Suzy’s turn. She was so nervous, she almost forgot to shake paws when she crossed the stage. She did forget to smile. Good thing no one was supposed to be taking pictures until the end. She returned to her seat next to Liza.

THEY'RE NOT BOOING THEY'RE CHANTING MOO - Animal Comedy - Animal Comedy,  funny animals, animal gifs

Mr. Atkins announced the name of the class president. A few of the students booed. How embarrassing. Apparently, she had led one too many food fights in the cafeteria. It had been a long year in some ways.

After everyone had crossed the stage, Mr. Atkins announced that the class had officially graduated. Some of the kids looks thrilled, a few looked relieved. Most of the parents looked like they were ready to head for the exits.

A final rendition of the class song, and it was all over. Except the pictures.

Meet Manny the selfie cat who just can't get enough of the camera - and  neither can his pet pals - World News - Mirror Online

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

 

13

Critter Cove HS Graduation Day

These animals really wish they were graduating | HelloGiggles

*Based on (semi) true events

Suzy was really nervous. She was on her way to graduation with her boyfriend Pete and his parents. Did his mom always talk this much?

Pete’s Mom: So Pete. Are you going to be sitting with all of your friends tonight?

Pete: Everyone except Jim. He has a pretty girlfriend to sit with.

Pete’s Dad: Your girlfriend is pretty too.

Clyde Willis (clydewillis1pi) | Cute cats, Cute animals, Cats

Awkward. Suzy and Pete weren’t sitting together at the ceremony. They hadn’t been going out for very long and hadn’t even discussed sitting together. But now Suzy was annoyed that Pete hadn’t asked her. The conversation kind of sat there.

Finally, they arrived at the auditorium. Suzy found her best friend Liza and they started talking about how excited they were. Everyone was supposed to get there at least an hour before the ceremony so there were a lot of animals roaming around.

The 6 kung fu kings of the animal kingdom | Animalogic

Liza: Did you hear what happened with Benji? He’s such a loser!

Suzy: What?

Liza: He and some friends ate some kind of herbal stuff that made him really agitated. He kicked out the glass in one of the doors on the first floor.

Suzy: Is he OK?

Liza (giggling): He’s fine. But they made him leave. He’s going to get his diploma in the mail. His parents are SO mad.

Collective Nouns for Groups of Animals | Mental Floss

Suzy wasn’t really sure which one of the stoners was Benji. That was pretty stupid. But at least he wouldn’t have to stand around forever. They weren’t really getting their diplomas until later either. They would be getting the holders when they walked across the stage.

Finally it was time to take their seats. It was kind of weird the way the school had set it up. The kids were allowed to sit with their friends, but when it was time to cross the stage they were supposed to get in alphabetical order. It was probably just as well there wouldn’t actually be anything personalized. Suzy was glad her name was in the middle of the alphabet.

This Two-Minute Video Of A Cat Just Sitting In A Chair Is Perfect In Every  Way

Liza: Can you believe we finally made it?

Suzy: I know. I can’t believe we won’t be seeing these people ever again.

She started reading the program.

Class colors: Crimson and pink

Not too sure about those. They looked awful with the school colors of blue and gold when she had hung them on her hat.

Class song: Don’t You Forget About Me

Who had chosen that? It was, like, 30 years old. Not the choice of anyone she knew.

Everyone Loves Their Pets And Want Them To Capture The Photo. | Cats, Cat  sleeping, Crazy cats

Class flower: Rose

Not the favorite either. They had chosen an onion blossom. It was a really pretty flower and different from what other schools had. Administration said it wasn’t a real flower. The rose came in second. Lame.

Liza: Look! Pete’s waving at you!

Cat sneaking a peek! | Cats, Cute cats, Crazy cats

Suzy turned around and waved. She noticed that the student section was almost full. What would happen if someone came in now? Would they really make them sit with their parents in the audience? 

Then she noticed her friends Carrie and Vicky sneaking in. They sat just behind her. Looked like it wouldn’t be a problem.

Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Commencement Exercises for the 2021 graduating class of Critter Cove High School.

To be continued.

May 22, 2020: Week 10, Volume 5 - Mendon-Upton Music

Pictures courtesy of Google Images

 

24

Senior Year Memories

16 Cats-Graduation Day... ideas | cats, cats and kittens, funny cats

Paisley was looking through her yearbook at what some of her classmates had been signing. Senior year had been so exciting. She was kind of sad it was almost over. The memories started flooding back.

Siberian Tiger - Facts and Beyond | Biology Dictionary

Hey Babe – Sorry about threatening to eat your date for prom. Glad we could work things out. We really belong together. Love 4ever Tommy

Keep Calm and Love Science: Laboratory Cat | Biyoloji

You were the best chemistry partner ever!!! Wonder if they’ll ever get that stain off the table. Gwen

Funny Quotes About Cats And Dogs Fighting. QuotesGram

Wishing you a lifetime of happiness. No hard feelings about that huge fight we had in the lunchroom over who has the best personality. Peace out, Kaylie

Cat Singing - Funny Cat Pictures | Cute animals, Funny cat pictures, Cats

Seems like we’ve been friends forever. Wish I didn’t have to leave town immediately following graduation. My boyfriend is sure we’ll make a lot of money on the road. Love, Jasmine

Cat Riding on top of his best friend : AnimalsBeingBros

Good luck in college. Sure you’ll be top cat wherever you go. Even in the dog-eat-dog “real world”. Ashley

Cute Raccoon (@bulka_s_makam) | Twitter

Sorry we didn’t get a chance to know each other a little better. Apologies once again for almost setting you on fire during the Senior trip. Hamilton

Cat With Makeup : aww

Your sleepovers were legendary. Your brother was so cute with makeup!! Jen

TheMetaPicture.com | Funny animal pictures, Funny animals, Funny cats

Going to prom with you was a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Thank goodness. Eddie

What Is The Name For A Group Of Cats? - Tuxedo Cat

The halls of Madison High will be a little quieter without you. Wishing you the best. Mr. Taylor, English Dept.

Photos Of Cat's Being Hilariously Overly Dramatic With Their Owners

Best of luck to my favorite drama queen. Mrs. Parks, Theater and Arts Dept.

16 Cats-Graduation Day... ideas | cats, cats and kittens, funny cats

Pictures courtesy of Google Images

22

Thunder K Katt: Kitchen Wiz

 

Greetings! We want to welcome back our cousin and collaborator, Thunder K. Katt. She’s here with tips for helping your human cook.

Hello everyone! It’s Thunder, and I’m here to show even how the most undomesticated kitty can help their human in the kitchen! Make sure your human is in a good mood before you help, though, or you may not get the compensation for your time that you deserve. All of these tricks have been tried by me and my sister, Onyx; hopefully they work well for you! 

Help set up by clearing off a space on the counter or table.

I’m not sure if all humans are as bad as mine are, but any time they clean off our counter and table, within two days it’s cluttered with new stuff! Cans of food (usually yucky foods, like canned veggies or sauces), bills, spices (again, nothing good like catnip- mine humans favor salt and white pepper), or bottles of soda- anything that fits will sit. Then, when she goes to mix the cake batter, or assemble the hamburgers, my mom gets super frustrated with the lack of space. Thankfully, cats can help with that! Use your paws or tails to swipe off the smaller items, such as pens, coins, and those pesky bills. If there are larger, bulkier items in the way, plop down next to them, forcing the full brunt of your weight against the item. They’ll move, and your human will have room to cook! Be careful not to disrupt anything glass, as the shards can hurt your paws, and try not to knock over any open containers of liquid- not only will you get wet, your humans will get grumpy. 

Help gather the ingredients.

Have you ever seen your human pace back and forth to the refrigerator and cupboard five or six times to gather what they need, only to realize they forgot one last ingredient, yet again disturb your afternoon lounge to gather it? Put an end to it by grabbing the ingredients for them! Although most containers won’t fit into our mouths (sticks of butter and some smaller produce varieties are the exception), you can jump on the shelf and knock the ingredients off for them. I’ve found this works best with sticks of butter, packages of cream cheese, meats and cheeses, and spices kept in sealed, plastic containers. I would avoid doing this with anything liquid, and with flour, sugar, or loose spices. If they’re looking for a produce item, roll it to them with your paw- try to avoid putting it in your mouth, as many things humans cook with are either too bulky to carry or can harm you if ingested. 

Test out the viability of the cookware.

What would be more tragic than your human working hard to prepare something, only to realize the dish they wanted to use wasn’t suitable to cook with? Save them the time and frustration by testing it out yourself! As soon as your human selects and lays down the dish they intend to use, jump into it. You can stalk around in it, roll in it, or just sit in it. Make sure you’re given enough time to truly test the quality of the dish- if you have to, repeat the procedure until you are satisfied. It is imperative that you perform this maneuver as soon as the dish is set out, to prevent anything from being put in the dish prematurely.

Quality inspection!

This is definitely one of the best parts of helping out in the kitchen! As yummy ingredients are opened and mixed together, make sure the quality is up to par! Simply go up to what you want to test and start licking. You can also stick your nose or paw in whatever you want, if there are multiple options. By doing this, you’re alerting your human that you’ve claimed that piece of food, and that they need to leave it for you. Don’t hesitate to perform quality checks multiple times throughout the cooking process- after all, a block of cream cheese is going to taste much different than cream cheese combined with milk, butter, and powdered sugar. You want to ensure that only the best is created in your kitchen!

Add fiber!

A big bonus to helping is the added fiber that cat fur brings to the meal! While performing your quality checks, take the opportunity to shed in some loose furs. You’re making yourself more comfortable, and adding the gift of beauty and fiber to your human’s creation! This sounds like a win-win to me. 

Make sure the oven is heated properly. 

It is important to note that this can only be done with ovens, not stoves, and this must be done with caution and good judgement! Most baked goods and oven roasted meals require the oven be preheated to a certain temperature before baking can ensue. Although most ovens beep to let you know when the desired temperature has been achieved, don’t leave anything to error. As soon as the door warms up, snuggle right up against it to make sure it is properly heated. Walk away as soon as your human opens it up, though- no kitty wants a nose burn! 

Help with cleanup.

Cleanup is typically seen as boring, and should mostly be left to the humans. However, there are a few ways you can have fun and help clean up. First, make sure you lead your human to the sink or trash can each time. This ensures your space is clean, and that they don’t get lost or distracted along the way. You can even sit in the sink if there’s room, since there’s no way any human can miss the adorableness of a cat. Secondly, much like how you help clear the space to cook, you can do the same for cleanup. Swat egg shells and wrappers onto the floor, or use your tail to sweep away powders. Paper towels make a wonderful crinkly toy that you can claim upon discard. Just avoid messing your beautiful furs up!  

Be a natural timer.

This trick works best with meats. How many times have you been able to smell the delicious meat being cooked, knowing full well that your meal is done, only to have your human sit around for minutes more, making you wait? As a natural timer, you can fix that problem! Cats have a superior sense of smell, and by extension, knowledge of when food is cooked. As soon as your nose and tummy agree that the meat is cooked, let your human know! This can be done by sitting in front of the oven and yowling, rubbing against your human while purring and then running towards the oven, or by jumping on and off of your human repeatedly. This way, even if they forget to set a timer, or if they set the incorrect amount of time, you’ve got them covered. 

Test the finished product! 

The final- and best- step of helping in the kitchen is being able to test the finished product. As soon as temperature allows, go up to the food in question and give it a few nibbles. You can start slowly by licking it, or you can go for a large chomp. If neither of these options appeal to you, you can step on it and leave a paw print, or you can leave nose smudges on it. If you enjoy the food, do everyone else a favor and drag it over to share! That’s the greatest compliment you can give to a chef! 

Hopefully these tips and tricks make your time in the kitchen more enjoyable! Everybody needs help; now you can be the purrfect assistant to your humans cooking needs!

Purrs and furs,

Thunder K. Katt

 

16

The RHCCC: The Crabapple Cove Coastal Cafe

The 5 Best CAT CAFES in Tokyo | favy

The ladies are meeting for a quick lunch at the Crabapple Cove Coastal Cafe. It’s not their usual spot, but they want to support Giselle, Miki’s daughter, who recently started working there.

Daphne: This is a nice place. I’ve never been here before.

Miki: Really? You’ve worked on the beach for years.

Daphne: I don’t usually have the time.

Bella: It’s a little out of the way.

File:Cats on Beach.JPG - Wikimedia Commons

Fluffy: Besides, it’s kind of a tourist spot in the summer. It gets really crowded.

Miki: That’s true. Giselle said that’s why they wanted her to start now. So she could be trained for the warm weather.

Giselle comes up and smiles at them.

Giselle: Good afternoon, ladies. Welcome to the Coastal Cafe. My name is Giselle. May I take your order?

Daphne: Hi, Giselle. How’s it going?

Giselle: So far, so good. I’m still learning a lot.

Can Cats Eat Tuna? Is Tuna Safe For Cats? - CatTime

Fluffy: I’m sure you’ll be great. I’ll have the tuna salad and some spring water.

The other agreed that the tuna sounded good and ordered the same thing. As Giselle finished writing down the order, a small dog two tables down started barking insistently.

Dog: Waitress, come here! We’re ready to order!

Giselle: Just a moment, please. I’m almost finished.

brown and white long coated small dog on white round table photo – Free  Canine Image on Unsplash

Dog: We’re in a hurry!

Giselle walks over to the table. There is a mother dog and her two sons waiting with her. The boys order burgers, and she waits for the woman’s order.

Dog: Is the kibble fresh?

Giselle: Yes, ma’am. They make it every morning.

Dog: Does it have any seafood in it? I’m allergic to shellfish. I could die if you try to feed me fish.

Does Your Dog's Breath Smell Like Fish? - PetPlace

Giselle: We have two types, Sea Treasure and High Plains Bounty. You could eat the High Plains Bounty.

Dog: You’re sure there isn’t any fish in it.

Giselle: No ma’am. It’s made out of beef and lamb. Only the finest ingredients.

Dog: OK. I’ll try it. But make sure there’s no seafood in it.

Giselle (writing on her pad): Would you like full-size or petite?

Dog: What’s the difference?

Giselle: The petite has smaller chunks. It’s specially made for our more delicate diners.

I Has A Hotdog - impatient - Page 2 - Funny Dog Pictures | Dog Memes | Puppy  Pictures | Pictures of dogs - Dog Pictures - Funny pictures of dogs - Dog  Memes - Puppy pictures - doge - Cheezburger

Dog: Well, I’m pretty delicate. I’ll have the petite. And make it quick. We’re in a hurry.

Giselle places the dog’s order at the same time she puts in the order for her mother’s table. Because the burgers have to be cooked the tuna is ready before the dogs’ food. Giselle takes it over and starts to serve.

Dog: Girl! I told you we’re in a hurry! Why are you serving them first? It’s because they’re cats, isn’t it? You cats are all alike!

Daphne: We ordered first! We should get our food first. She didn’t do anything wrong.

Dog: It’s obvious favoritism.

State Cat - Maine Coon Cat | Maine Secretary of State Kids' Page

Miki starts to hiss. Giselle puts down their food quickly and goes to the kitchen. She returns with the burgers and kibble. The boys look at their burgers and start to scarf them down. The mother dog sniffs and does not look pleased.

Dog: You gave me cat kibble, and it has fish!

Giselle: We don’t have cat kibble. We only have Sea Treasure and High Plains Bounty. They can be eaten by any animal.

Dog: This smells like fish! You brought the wrong thing. It should have gone to the cat table!

Giselle: Let me take it back, and get you another bowl.

Distemper Cases Rise Among California's Foxes, Raccoons, Skunks – CDFW News

Giselle quickly gets a replacement bowl of kibble and places it in front of the dog.

Dog (sniffing): What is wrong with you? Are you trying to kill me?? This smells like fish! Get me the manager!

Giselle bursts into tears and runs away to find the manager. Her mother and her friends get up and start to go over. A raccoon sitting between them reaches the dog first.

Raccoon: Try to calm down ma’am. She’s gone to find someone to help you.

Dog: She’s an idiot! Smell this food! It’s obviously full of fish.

The raccoon sniffs the food. Then he takes a bite. He chews thoughtfully. Then he takes another bite.

Raccoon: That’s delicious! I don’t taste any fish.

Dog: Hmmph! What do you know?

30 Adorable Husky Pictures | Reader's Digest

The manager approaches the table with Giselle. He’s a young Siberian Husky with a deep voice.

Manager: What seems to be the problem?

Dog: This CAT is trying to feed me cat food that’s made from fish. And I’m allergic to fish.

Manager: Ma’am, we don’t sell cat kibble; we sell all-species kibble. It appears that she did serve you petite-style. Did you want it replaced with regular?

Dog: I want it replaced with something that doesn’t contain fish! She knows I’m allergic and she’s trying to poison me.

The manager took a pawful of the kibble and sniffed it thoroughly before he ate it. He looked at Giselle.

Why is my Siberian Husky not eating? – petsKB

Manager: I can’t taste any fish in this kibble. It’s definitely High Plains Bounty. Perhaps it’s the smell of the ocean so close that is confusing you.

Dog: I’m not confused! There’s fish in that kibble! This is outrageous!

Manager: I’d be happy to replace it with anything on the menu.  But this is the only non-seafood kibble we have.

The puppies are trying to pretend that nothing is happening as they finish their meals. The rest of the diners are watching the mother. She looks outraged. Finally, she stands up.

Dog: Boys, get up. We’re leaving. And we are never coming back here.

She storms out of the cafe without paying. The other diners applaud as she leaves. Miki gives her a final hiss.

Clap Your Hands - Daily Squee - Cute Animals - Cute Baby Animals - Cute  Animal Pictures - Animal Gifs - GIF Animals

13

Scrolling Through Animal Twitter

Cat with a cell phone. The cat with a cell phone is on a beach , #Sponsored, #cell, #Cat, #phone, #beach, #cat #ad | Cats, Cat artwork, Funny animals

Before we get started, we would like to thank Oliver at Feline Opines for featuring us on this week’s chat.

Note: We don’t have Twitter. All references are figments of our imaginations and, hopefully, bear no resemblance to reality.

Black Bear

Marley Bear @bearcubmom

Cubs are adorable. And maybe one day, I’ll get all of the berry juice out of my fur. Or maybe I should just try to love purple fur.

Crushed nuts: Photographer captures a family of squirrels in a tree

Sophie Squirrel @squirreljinx

Looking for a roommate. Affordable rates. Must be willing to share tree with extended family and very noisy magpies. Would prefer sound sleeper. Please no raccoons or other creatures of the night.

My mom's 'no cats on the table' rule doesn't get enforced when you're this cute : cats

CatsCatsCats @CatsCatsCats

Read our review of “Cat Table Manners.” It’s another hilarious human book about ways to “train” us. They seem to think that we belong on the floor when the food is on the table.

pictures of unicorns - Google Search | Unicorn pictures, Real unicorn, Magical creatures

UnicornsRReal @unicornsunited

Unity rally taking place 1 pm this Friday at Memorial Park near the gazebo. We will march to City Hall and present our petition for formal recognition as a species. Bring your friends and family. No doubters/haters please.

Cute hedgehogs eating mushrooms | Cute animals, Animals, Animals beautiful

Hal Hedgehog @hoggyhal

Don’t forget Snail Fest this weekend. Fun for the whole family. Games and food for all. Be sure to stop by and try my homemade snail marinade. I’ve been working on it for weeks. My wife says it goes or I do.

Timeline Photos - Amazing World of Animals & Nature | Boxer puppies, Boxer dogs, Boxer puppy

Frankie @therealdealdog

City Council is working to tighten the leash laws again. No pun intended. All you dogs running around loose: get yourselves together. I don’t want to lose my park privileges because you can’t control yourselves.

Persian Cat Names - Over 200 Gorgeous Ideas!

Penelope Persian @genuineamericanbeauty

I can’t believe the humans are thinking about getting another cat! They barely have time to meet my needs. My breakfast was 10 minutes late this morning. And they completely forgot treats yesterday! How are they ever take care of two of us?

cell phone animals - St Mary Anne's Church

All pictures courtesy of Google Images