Where we are: Uncle Stu Alligator organized a group of animals to go to the Homeowners’ Association (HOA) Board Meeting to protest violations they had received on their lots. He may have been a little too successful. The gathering had frightened the board members into locking the doors and telling the animals that their requests for review had to be put into writing. Disappointed, the animals returned to their homes. If you missed the beginning of the story or the middle of the story, you can catch up here and here.
Stu and Amanda had invited Stan, Adele, and the girls over for a barbecue on Saturday.
Justine: What happened with your protest, Uncle Stu?
Stu: Can you believe we scared the board members so they wouldn’t even let us talk?
Justine: That’s not fair! The last time we were here, they told you that you had to go to the meeting.
Stu: I know that. I think it’s because it’s run by that Erskine Weasel. He won’t even look at me when we’re out at the same time.
Suzy: The board is run by a weasel? Who else is on the board?
Stu: Let’s see. There’s a cow, a goat, a gerbil, and a jackrabbit.
Justine: Uncle Stu, I know that we’re civilized gators and don’t eat our neighbors. But those animals all sound rather delicious.
Stan: Justine! Are you suggesting Uncle Stu eat the board members?
Justine: Not at all. I’m just thinking that a big, strong alligator like Uncle Stu might look threatening to them. Especially when he had all those other animals with him.
Stu: That’s ridiculous. I only eat meat that has been ethically sourced.
Amanda had gone out for the mail.
Amanda: Stu, you might not want to laugh. We just got a letter from the HOA Board.
Stu: What does it say?
Amanda: “Dear Neighbors, After much discussion and thought, the board of the Orchard Bluff Homeowners Association is resigning. In light of the kerfuffle at our most recent board meeting, we do not feel safe being responsible for enforcing the agreed-upon rules. We will be holding an election at the next board meeting. Sincerely, Erskine J Weasel.”
Justine: Wow. He really is a weasel. Someone stands up to him and he runs away.
Amanda: Can they do that? How will we find a new board in less than a month?
Stan: I was looking into the agreement you and Stu signed. It says that board members must give 60 days notice if they resign before their term ends.
Adele: I suppose fear of being eaten is probably considered an extenuating circumstance.
Stu: Who do you suppose will be dumb enough to try and run this place? Oh, well. Time for the food.
It became clear over the next couple of weeks that the only thing the neighbors could agree on was that they hadn’t realized how different they were from each other. They liked each other well enough as neighbors, but they didn’t want anyone telling them what to do with their houses or yards.
The next board meeting was extremely well attended. This time there were no signs or chants, just an edgy group of animals.
Erskine: I now call this meeting to order. Janelle, will you please read the agenda for tonight?
Janelle: There are only two issues on the agenda. First, the acceptance of the current board’s resignations. Second, elect a new board.
Erskine: Very well. We will conduct business by voice vote. All those in favor of accepting the board’s resignations, say “aye.”
There was broad approval.
Erskine: Those opposed.
A few voices were heard.
Erskine: We’ll now open the floor to discussion of the candidates.
Bucky Beaver: I nominate Stu Gator for President of the board.
Stu shook his head vigorously, but no one seemed to notice.
Eddy Black Bear: I agree. Let’s vote.
No one knew if it had been prearranged or not, but Stu won by an overwhelming voice vote.
Stu: I really appreciate it, everyone. But I’m not cut out to run the HOA. I need a list for more than one thing at the supermarket.
Adele nodded. It really didn’t sound like a good idea. But the crowd was sure. They quickly found four other animals to round out the Board.
Stu: Okay. If you insist. Let me talk with the new Board members for a few minutes, and we’ll get things started.
He went into a small room with Ziggy Iguana, Seth Sheepdog, Bucky Beaver, and Talulah Tabby. They emerge a few minutes later, nodding in agreement.
Stu: The Board and I came to a unanimous agreement. We’re throwing out the old agreement. The new agreement is much easier to keep straight. You can do what you want to in your backyard as long as it doesn’t move into your neighbors’ yards. In the front, it’s still no lawn ornaments, no rusting vehicles or vehicles without wheels, and nothing invasive that’s going to be moving to your neighbors’ yards without permission. We’ll be writing it up and sending it out in the next few days.
Voice from the Crowd: What will you guys be doing?
Stu: We really don’t know. We’re going to go through the by-laws and see if there’s still a role for us. If not, we’ll be dissolving the Board. Now let’s all go to Sally’s Sundaes. We can use some of the fees the HOA has been collecting.
All pictures generated by Gemini AI
Adventures in Cheeseland 