20

June and the Bears’ Camping Trip – Part 2

Where we are: Ilsa and Heather McBear have invited their kitten friend June on a family camping weekend in the woods. You can read the beginning of the story here. About 4p on Friday, June Longfur hear a car pull into the driveway.

(Not sure where the extra cub came from)

June: Papa! They’re here! Bring my stuff, please!

Papa comes into the room with a large bag. He opens the door and waves to Daddy McBear. June runs past him to the car.

Ilsa: Daddy! Daddy! Open the door so June can get in.

Angus McBear gets out of the car and opens the door to the back seat. June jumps in, and they start chattering as if they hadn’t left school together an hour before. Matilda McBear smiles at them from the front seat. Angus turns to Papa Longfur.

Daddy: Here, let me take that from you. Oof. What’s in there, bricks?

Papa: I’m sorry. I know that you said you’d take care of everything except June’s bed. But my wife was concerned that cats are really different from bears, and you wouldn’t know how to feed her or keep her busy all the time. This is a huge improvement from where we started. She originally had two bigger bags packed.

Daddy McBear laughed as he threw the bag in the back.

Daddy: Don’t worry. June will be safe with us. We’ll be back before dinner on Sunday.

Papa: Have fun, Princess. Be sure you listen to the McBears.

June: Bye, Papa! I’ll see you Sunday!

They arrived at the campsite around dinnertime. June had never seen so many trees. She wasn’t sure she liked the forest, but she tried to be brave.

Mummy: Why don’t you girls go explore while Daddy and I set up the camp. Since we don’t have any fish yet, I’m making burgers. How would you like yours, June?

June looked confused and didn’t say anything.

Ilsa: She means, do you eat meat raw or cooked?

June: Mama says that raw meat is for feral cats. May I have it cooked?

Mummy: Of course, sweetie. We can eat it either way. Ilsa, Heather – show June how we collect wood, please.

They grabbed a cloth from the trunk and run toward the wood. June races after them. They stop after a few minutes.

Heather: This looks like a good place.

They spread out the cloth and start putting sticks in it. June watches them.

June: I don’t think I can help. I need all of my paws for standing.

Heather: That’s okay. You can look for sticks and stand by them.

It didn’t take long to fill the cloth with sticks. Each cub grabbed two corners to hold the sticks in place.

Ilsa: Want a ride, June?

June: I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’ll make it too heavy.

Heather: No, you won’t. We’re strong.

June jumped on and rode back to camp like royalty. Mummy and Daddy laughed when they saw her.

Daddy: That’s one way to make sure she didn’t get lost.

June jumped down and looked around. There was a fire pit and shelter. A large basket held food. Fishing supplies were propped against a tree. The back of the car was open, and June could see more food. It looked like mainly snacks. She could see her fluffy bed under the shelter.

June: I thought you were supposed to hang your food from trees when you camp?

The bears looked at each other.

Daddy: Do you know why they say that?

June: I guess it stays fresher that way with no refrigerator.

The bears relaxed and laughed.

Mummy: No, that’s a human thing. They think bears won’t touch their food if they hang it up.

June: I thought you guys could climb trees.

Ilsa: We can. Since the humans are in our space, some bears think they have a right to the humans’ food.

Heather: I don’t really like it unless it’s berries or something.

Daddy: Don’t worry, June. Our food is safe; even your kitty kibble.

Dinner was delicious. The McBears put some kind of honey sauce on their burgers. June tried some, but it stuck to her paws and face. Definitely not cat-friendly. Soon it was getting dark.

Daddy: Who wants a marshmallow roasted?

Heather: I do!

Isla: I do!

Daddy: How about you, June?

June: What’s a marshmallow?

Heather: It’s a white cube kinda thing. They’re really sweet. Bears love them.

Isla: And raccoons.

June: I don’t really like sweet things.

Heather: You can try a bite of mine.

She took a bite and handed the rest to June. June tried to bite it, but it got in here long fur. Why did bears eat so many sticky things?

June: Ugh. Thanks, but I’ll just watch.

The bears and June sat around the fire telling scary stories. June didn’t get scared. She was sure the bears would protect her. Besides, she really didn’t understand a lot of the stories. They were mainly about humans, and she didn’t know any humans.

Daddy: Okay. We’ve all had a long day. Time for bed.

The bears all chose spots under the shelter. Everyone else slept on the ground, but June was happy in her fluffy bed between the girls. They were a short distance from the adult bears.

Mummy woke up when the sun rose. She poked Daddy to get him up too. They needed to fish for breakfast. As they walked past the girls, Mummy looked over. No one was there.

Mummy: They’re gone! My babies are gone! Humans must have taken them. What should we do?

Daddy: I doubt humans took them.

Mummy: They’re so cute! Of course, humans took them. They always grab cute animals.

Daddy: Matilda, calm down. We need to look around. They probably just wandered off.

Next week: Where did they go?

All pictures generated with Gemi

18

Calico Cate’s Online Empurrium

Hello everyone. I wanted to tell you about the new online store I found. It’s called Calico Cate’s Online Empurrium. They sell pretty much anything a cat could desire. In addition to the standard beds, dishes, and toys, Cate’s also has consignment section where cats can sell things that didn’t quite work out for them, but might for someone else.

Amazon.com : Dorayaki Shape Dog & Cat Bed,Keep Warm and Super Soft Creative Pet Nest for Indoor Cats,Removable Washable Cushion Suitable for Cats Up to 16.53 Lbs (Red B) : Pet Supplies

For example, this extra-cozy bed.The seller wrote, “I really loved this bed. You can snuggle up and totally hide yourself away. Unfortunately, my human couldn’t seem to remember that it might be holding a cat and kept moving it around. Then the dumb dog sat on me.” Price: 1 cooked chicken breast or best offer.

Why Do Cats Like Boxes? | PetMD

Description: “High quality cardboard box. I have spent many happy hours in this box. And it does really fit me well. But I think I want to move into something sturdier. Am possibly looking for something slightly larger. Something that the humans won’t keep trying to take away. (They really don’t understand why this is the perfect box.” Price: 2 silvervine sticks

Cat And Fish Images – Browse 141,007 Stock Photos, Vectors, and Video | Adobe Stock

Description: “Fish in bowl. I had thought that the humans bought me an extremely fresh snack. Or a really cool toy. Wrong! They think that you put this thing on the table and look at it.And I can’t try to touch it or sit too close to it, because I might scare it. They said that looking at it makes them calmer. What a waste!” Price: Free. If I can’t eat it or play with it, it’s worthless.

Cats vs. Dogs: Exploring Feline Intelligence and Canine IQ · Kinship

Description: “Almost grown dog. Extremely fluffy and energetic. Turned out to not be trainable. Couldn’t get him to sneak snacks or give me rides. He is very friendly. Watch out for big, wet kisses. Pric’e: One bag of kibble

Glowing red dot still at large, warn cat detectives - The Beaverton

Description: “One red dot. It has made a fool out of me for the last time. I have spent many hours chasing this red dot with no success. I believe it may be defective. I am an experienced hunter and will not live with that thing in my house any longer. Price: One blue dot or one green dot

Wagon Ride with Louie

Description: “Small red wagon. I didn’t read the description correctly when I bought it. I assumed it would come with a human or dog to pull me. I am a princess. I do not like to walk if I can be carried or pulled. Price: 1 jar of beef and liver treats.

And these are just a few of the items you can find at the Empurrium.

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

19

Cat Council: Dealing with Toddler Trauma

Snoops: I call this meeting of the Cat Council to order. We need to discuss what’s happening in our home.

Kommando: Should we invite the new cats? They’ve been living with the invaders.

Snoops: Nah. They’re still in quarantine. Let’s deal with one problem at a time.

Sgt Stripes: I’m excited. You ladies usually ignore me.

Snoops:  We need all the brain power we can muster. This is huge.

Sgt Stripes: I did some research on the invaders. I love Mr. Google.

Kommando: Did it say anything about why they sound like howler monkeys?

Sgt Stripes: Not that I remember.

Snoops: It’s kinda true. They get started crying and it just gets really loud.

Sgt Stripes: I have noticed that. I can hear them through the floor. And the doors.

Kommando: We can even hear them in the basement.

Snoops: I wonder if they have “off” buttons?

Kommando: We should ask their Mom. Maybe she just needs to find it.

Snoops: Maybe she can find the self-cleaning button too.

Kommando: Yeah. They’re even messier than you when they eat.

Snoops: I’m not messy.

Kommando: You’re the reason we have mats under our bowls.

Snoops: I can’t help it that I have a more delicate face and don’t want it to get full of food.

Kommando: Whatever. At least you don’t leave a trail. I keep crunching crumbs under my paws.

Snoops: They don’t ever leave good stuff either. There’s never any chicken or fish laying around.

Sgt Stripes: They have kinda smelly milk too.

Snoops: I heard it’s called “oat” milk.

Kommando: What kind of cow is an “oat”?

Snoops: I don’t think it’s a cow. It smells weird.

Sgt Stripes: Nothing at all like cat milk.

Kommando: They have stuff in most of our lounging spots too. It’s really hard to get a good spot on the table anymore.

Snoops: Yeah. And there’s stuff on the sofa and chairs too.

Sgt Stripes: Too bad you guys don’t come upstairs. I lost my own bedroom, but they have a couple of beds I use regularly. Besides, when Mom cleaned the spare room, she found a huge comfy cat bed.

Snoops: I think that was mine!

Sgt Stripes: Hmm. Key word is “was”.

Snoops: Don’t give me another reason to dislike you.

Kommando: On the bright side, they’re not as grabby as I thought they might be.

Snoops: That’s true. The bigger one has petted me a couple of times, but that’s it

Sgt Stripes: I try to avoid them. But they don’t chase me, and their Mom pets me. So it’s OK.

Snoops: Yeah. I agree. Not great. But OK.

Kommando: Did Mr. Google tell you anything interesting about them?

Sgt Stripes: I learned a few interesting things:

  • Toddlers don’t really understand that they can hurt us. They don’t know that pulling our tails, or picking us up wrong, or throwing things at us can hurt us.
  • Adult humans shouldn’t leave their toddlers alone with us. They need to teach them the right way to treat us.
  • The big humans should make sure that we don’t get too stressed. If they pay attention, they can remove us before we get into a fight with the toddler.
  • There should always be a safe space for us to go and hide.

Snoops: That stuff all sounds good. Because if someone pulls my tail, I am not going to be a happy cat. and someone is going to know it.

Kommando: I think we should Mom for a new kitty condo to hide in. It seems like the least she could do for us.

Snoops: That’s an excellent idea.

Sgt Stripes: And some shelves to hide on.

Snoops: So we’re all agreed. Mom need to make this up to us.

Agreement all around.

24

Sgt Stripes Reporting for Duty

Hello, everyone! My name is Sgt Stripes, and I am the new cat in the house. I moved in three weeks ago after my surgery. They said they had to “fix” me. Pretty insulting if you ask me. I think they actually broke me. The doc said I was going to need a couple of weeks to recuperate fully. I was up and exploring by that night.

I was supposed to be separated from the lady cats (Snoops and Kommando) for two weeks while I healed and then introduced. It didn’t work out that way. I got loose after a couple of days and ran downstairs. I woke up Snoops. She was not pleased. I’ve never seen a cat that fluffy. She sounded really mad too.

Then I got out and met Kommando. I tried to walk up to her, but she ran away from me. She hid under the bed. I didn’t even get a chance to introduce myself. I hope she’s not really afraid of me. I didn’t chase her or anything. And I didn’t make any noise.

So they’ve been letting me stay upstairs during the day and in my room at night. I really like it here. I have my own full-size bed. They have a cat-size bed too, but I’m not sure who’s supposed to be staying in that one. They gave me some kind of blanket that warms up. I really like it since it’s gotten kinda cold. There are all kinds of places to jump on. And lots of windows to look out. But it’s kind of boring all by myself.

I have a big fish that I play with, but my favorite is something that Mom calls a “puffy.” I guess humans put soap in them and use them when they take a bath. It’s the perfect size for me to pull on the edges and use as a kick toy. Humans take weird baths. I thought water was just for drinking. I’ve discovered that I really like toilet paper. It shreds like crazy. It’s the perfect workout for my claws. For some reason, the humans don’t like having it all over the room.

The food is pretty good. I get wet food in the morning, and kibble at night. I haven’t seen any mice or voles on the menu yet. I’m hoping that I’ll get a shot at fresh meat soon. I tried some of my brother’s pasta today. Human food is fun, but some of it doesn’t taste very good.

The humans spend quite a bit of time with me. I like humans. They cuddle and pet me. I had to learn not to try to eat Mom though. She got really fussy when I tried gnawing on her arm. Head bonks seem popular. And humans are nice and warm! I like the computer too. But I haven’t figured out how to catch the animals in there.

I learned how to turn on the ceiling fan. The cord is long and I can pull it from my bed. The only problem is, that makes the room kind of cold. Mom said something about getting a different cord. I haven’t really had a chance to check out all the cool things on the top of the dresser yet.

I tried going downstairs again this evening. Snoops seemed okay with it. Not thrilled, but she stayed normal-size. Mom says tomorrow’s the day for the formal introduction. She’s going to bring in a huge catnip plant to distract the other cats. I’m going to have full run of the house. I can’t wait.

17

2021 Gift Guide for the Pampered Kitty

Greetings fellow felines. It’s that time of year again when we ask Santa Claws to fulfill our hearts’ desires. This year we decided that we would focus our buying guide on cool beds. After all, what cat doesn’t like to curl up in comfort on a cold winter day. So look through the items we found, and circle the one you want to find under your Christmas tree.

K&H Pet Products Thermo-Kitty Heated Cat Bed – $84.99 (also available from Amazon)

When unoccupied, the bed surface will remain 10-15 degrees greater than room temperature. When in use, the bed will heat to your cat’s natural body temperature, which is about 102° F.

MYZOO Spaceship Gamma – $155 (also available from Amazon)

Wall-mounted and futuristic. What could be cooler?

MEOWFIA Premium Cat Bed Cave – $49.99 (Amazon)

Handmade from merino wool. Snug as a bug in a rug. (So to speak.)

Paws & Purrs Modern Pet Sofa – $269 (Amazon)

Purr-fectly elegant. Get a set and invite an intellectual friend over for kitty book club.

D+GARDEN Wicker Cat Bed – $125.99 (Amazon)

Bring your garden memories into the house. This bed is especially comfy for big kitties.

B.U.STYLE Cat Bed Basket Swinging Pet House Nest – $109.90 (Amazon)

You can move this beauty outside in the spring. It’s intended for smaller kitties so it may be a little delicate for some of you. (But it does look pretty spiffy.)

Finally, we thought that we would include a couple of treats just because we came across them when we were using Mr. Google and they looked interesting.

Tuna Sticks Cat Treats – $9.99

These delicious-looking treats are hand-rolled and baked. They contain tuna, whole wheat flour, eggs, parsley, and water.

Lactose-Free Ice Cream – $10.99

Your human can make you ice cream from powdered goat’s milk, bonito (fish) flakes, and water. All they do is mix and freeze. Yummy!

Hopefully you’ve seen something that appeals to you. After all, we can all use another napping place.

Ed. Note: We have not actually tried any of these products and are not endorsing them We just thought they looked cool.