Sgt Stripes: Snoops, I’m worried. Mom said she was running around like a chicken with her head cut off. She still had her head. And she didn’t looks anything like a chicken. Do you think she’s gone crazy? Maybe we should get her a new mirror.
Snoops: She doesn’t really think she’s a chicken. That’s just something humans say when they’re really busy. Since Blondie’s been gone, she’s been watching the little humans as well as being our human. Plus she’s working and trying to sell her uncle’s house.
Sgt Stripes: Wow. That’s a lot. Maybe we should do a Cat Council and try to help.
Snoops: That’s a good idea. Maybe then I’ll start getting a sufficient number of pets and cuddles.
So the five cats held a meeting.
Snoops: Okay everyone. We need to find a way to help Mom be less busy so she can spend more time with us.
Gypsy: She needs some help with those little humans. Every night it’s the same thing: brush their teeth, give them a bath, read to them, put them to bed. She exhausted by the time we supposed to cuddle. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT.
Angel: Well, the mornings aren’t much better. She gives us breakfast, but then she gets their breakfast ready, then puts clothes on them, lets them eat, puts on their shoes, and drives them somewhere. She doesn’t get back until dinner time. And then they need to eat dinner and play outside.
Sgt Stripes: It sounds like she needs help with those little humans. We need to share our experience with her so they don’t take up so much time.
Snoops: That’s a good idea. She doesn’t seem to have started them on hunting yet.
Onyx: That sounds like it is way overdue.
Snoops: I agree. I’ll need to give some of the mice who get into the house to her. It’s going to be tough to train the little humans. The most important part of hunting is patiently waiting. And they are not good at that.
Angel: That’s true. When they come in at the end of the day, they get grumpy if food doesn’t appear in front of them immediately.
Onyx: Maybe we should just catch the mice and let the boys chase them. Eventually they’ll probably get the hang of it.
Snoops: They’ll starve before that happens. I guess I’ll have to train them myself. I hope it goes better than when I trained Kommando. She thought they were toys.
Sgt Stripes: They are a lot of fun to play with. Until they stop moving.
Snoops: No wonder Mom thinks you’re related to her.
Gypsy: What’s the deal with the litter training? They keep having “accidents”. And no one ever puts them in the litter box to show them how to use it. It’s a little revolting to smell that.
Onyx: That’s true. But I am not sharing my litter box with them.
Angel: Me either. Maybe we can talk Mom into getting them one of their own.
Gypsy: Excellent idea.
Onyx: Have you seen how she bathes them? It is so inefficient. They get drenched in water, just to get some kind of bubbly stuff rubbed on, then they get drenched again.
Snoops: I think that humans have to get bathed like that. Their tongues don’t work right to do it our way.
Gypsy: Ugh. I am not cleaning them for Mom.
Sgt Stripes: That would be so disgusting.
Snoops: Yeah. I guess she’s stuck doing what she’s doing.
Angel: She needs to train them to eat kibble. They can get it out of the bin now for us, but they never feed themselves. It would save Mom so much time.
Snoops: That is an excellent idea. I think we’ve come up with some good ideas for Mom. Teach them to hunt, use a litter box, and eat kibble from the bin.
Sgt Stripes: Pawsome! More treats and cuddles should be expected soon.
Adventures in Cheeseland 