Category Archives: cats

24

Kommando Kitty: Proud to be Piebald

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Greetings. Kommando Kitty here. It seems like Sgt Stripes has been running the blog lately. First he took over the upstairs, now he’s getting pushy on here. Mom said I could have a week to talk about whatever I wanted to. At first, I thought about just running a bunch of pictures to show everyone how cute I am. But you guys already know that. Then I was going to talk about how stressed out I am with our new living arrangements. But you guys already know that too.

I’ve decided that I will talk a little bit about my most obvious trait: my gorgeous white-and-grey coat. Mom once said that I was colored like a type of cow, a Holstein-Friesian. I was really offended; she really hurt my feelings. Then I discovered that other people call us cow cats too. Or Moo Cats, which is even worse. (Some people think cows are cute; humans are weird.) Apparently, I am officially a piebald. Piebalds are white cats that have spots of any other color, even tabby. Or, technically, cats of other colors with white spots. Tuxedo cats are officially piebalds. Everyone thinks they’re elegant, so I guess that’s better than being a cow cat.

There’s an actual science associated with bicolor cats. It happens when a cat inherits a piece of a “white spotting gene.” The actual piece of the gene with the coding is called an allele. Alleles can be either dominate or recessive on the gene. If a kitty has two dominant white spotting alleles, they will be more than half white. If a kitty receives one dominant and one recessive white spotting alleles, they will have a more even mix of white and some darker color.

The coat patterns are divided into a scale:

  • Less than 40% white – low-grade
  • 40-60% white – medium-grade
  • More than 60% white – high-grade

That means that I’m a high-grade kitty. (But I already knew that.) The Cat Fanciers have a bicolor rating system: 1 has no white and 10 is all white. White spotting generally starts on the chest or belly, then moves to the front paws, sides, and finally to the legs and face.

There are several common patterns of piebald cats

Tuxedo – predominantly black with white tummy, chest, pay, and sometimes chin and/or nose

Cow – predominantly white with black spots on the torso

Van – predominantly white with black on the head and tail only

Mask-and-Mantle – black back, shoulders, and head; white underside

Cap-and Saddle –  predominantly white; black on the top of the head and on the lower back, near the tail

Locket – black with a small white patch on the chest or tummy

A few other random facts:

  • Cats that look like me are also called harlequins or magpies.
  • More of us are short-haired than long-haired for some reason.
  • Our coloring helps us hunt in areas that have patches of light and shadows
  • Because there are so many kitties with these types of markings, some humans think we’re “common” and want a more unusual-looking pet when they go to shelters.
  • We are generally mixed breeds which means that we will usually enjoy a long, healthy life

I couldn’t find any famous cats that are piebald who aren’t tuxedo cats, which was a little disappointing. But I still feel better knowing I have so many piebald buddies out there.

26

A Day in the Life of Sgt Stripes

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Hello! Sgt. Stripes here! I’ve been hard at work lately. My human sister, Blondie, has been working from home. And I’ve been getting to help her! Even better, I’ve also been able to attend therapy with her (she has anxiety and depression. She’d never make it as a cat). She made my formal title “Tummy Time Therapist with Office Management Requirements”. And it’s hard work! I’m going to share a typical day in the life in the workforce. 

6:30AM: 

This is when Blondie (and the mini humans) wake up. She gets them dressed and off to the day shelter, where they play and do art. Blondie calls it a daycare. But Snoops says it’s more like a shelter. I get to sleep through this, since I don’t do cars. Or mini humans. 

7:45AM: 

Blondie returns home. She gets our laptop out, and makes sure that it and our work cell are charged. She also gets her notepad ready. This is usually when I do my big kitty stretch and prepare myself for another strenuous day. 

8:00AM: 

Time to start work! We start by logging onto her email, her Teams (a Skype descendant), and her scheduling tool. I usually get to send a message to a few of her coworkers. Today alone, I said hello to the group chat (all 20 people!), the checkout person, and the echocardiogram coordinator, along with one of the medical assistants. Everyone loves my welcome messages! 

8:10AM:

Once we say good morning to our team, we review our email. Blondie makes a lot of phone calls, but won’t start until 9. So I get to help send out letters to patients who didn’t show up for their appointments, schedule urgent add on surgeries, and review our load for the day. I’ve discovered this is best done by sitting on the keyboard of the laptop. That way I’m warm, and am close enough to the screen to see. 

9:00AM: 

Now I get to start helping with phone calls! Usually the morning calls go to patients who need a presurgical workup. I don’t actually talk to these people (it sounds pretty depressing, honestly). But I definitely do my part. I sit with one paw on Blondie while she types, and I make sure to sit on the phone cord. You know, in case the phone tries to escape or something. These calls usually take most of the morning. 

12:00PM: 

Lunch break! Usually Blondie goes downstairs and gets tea and a sandwich, but I get to chow down on kibble (or cereal. She eats cereal and we share sometimes). I’m hoping my employee of the year luncheon features vole. I really like vole, But after I eat, I usually use the facilities, stop by the scratching post, and get a nap in. 

1:00PM: 

Back to work! The afternoon is usually a little more interesting. We usually start by calling patients that need pacemakers or ablations. I really, really like this part. We have to email them a surgical packet, and I’m really good at adding attachments or screenshots. I discovered if you push a bunch of random keys all at once, the computer will do fun things! Blondie gets a little weird about this, though. I start on the computer, but usually end up on her chest. At least I still get to supervise. 

3:00PM: 

If Blondie has therapy, this is usually when it happens. I like to sit up by her head and meow at her therapist. He needs to know who the really important one is. Although they just talk a lot, which is boring. So I usually use this time to get some tummy rubs. Or jaw rubs. Or both. I just really love rubs. 

4:00PM: 

Therapy is over (finally). Unfortunately, that means my tummy and jaw rub session slows down, as well. But we get to start scheduling my favorite things: MRIs! These are really fun, because I can make the appointment move by laying on her mousepad. I also really like to interact with these patients. I’ll headbonk the phone, purr into the speaker, and rub the phone so Blondie drops it. These patients are usually more fun than our surgical ones. One time, I scheduled the MRI in the totally wrong year. But I don’t feel bad. It’s a complex system, and I’m still learning it. 

5:00PM: 

The day is over! Man, these days are exhausting. I usually try to persuade Blondie to stay and nap. She never does though. She has to go get the mini humans from the day shelter. So I help her put her items up (I love batting at the phone cord!) and then I usually protect her work case. It’s a really comfy spot to nap. 

After work is over, I only have 15 hours to eat, bathe, play, groom, and relax. It’s quite stressful somedays! But I know my hard work is paying off! Although I think I’m going to request a pay raise and a really nice bonus this Christmas. Maybe some vole ice cream, and silvervine cereal. Hopefully your work days are just as productive! 

20

Cats v Toddler Noise Pollution

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Greetings fellow felines. Snoops and Kommando Kitty here. We’re here with an update to our living situation. As you may know, our human sister moved back home a couple of months ago with her miniature humans. They are two and three years old. We are slowly adjusting to the new situation. We have both returned to the main floor, although we are doing our best to avoid the small creatures.

Kommando: It’s gotten a lot better since they started going to the human shelter during the day some days.

Snoops: I think the humans call it a daycare.

Kommando: I guess that explains why they come home every night.

Snoops: Yeah. That was pretty disappointing the first couple of times it happened.

Kommando: At least we get to eat in peace now.

Snoops: At long as we’re done before they get home. That blonde one still eats our food if we leave it down.

Kommando: Yeah. I don’t get it. We won’t eat the wet stuff after a few hours, but he doesn’t seem to have a problem with it.

Snoops: Even the salmon which isn’t that great when it’s fresh.

Sgt Stripes: Hi ladies. That sounds pretty rough. By the time they come upstairs, it’s bedtime. So I only see them for a few minutes. Of course, every morning they wake me up. Apparently they don’t like getting ready for that daycare thing.

Snoops: Do they scream and yell?

Sgt Stripes: Pretty much every morning.

Snoops: That’s the worst.

Kommando: I dunno. They’re really loud sometimes when they’re not screaming too.

Snoops: You know, cats have really sensitive hearing.

Kommando: That’s what makes us such excellent hunters.

Snoops: Our ears are really cool. The outer ear consists of the ear flap and canal. We can rotate our ears independently to hear sounds coming from different directions. Then we have the middle ear that’s full of small auditory bones and the eardrum. The inner ear has the cochlea and semicircular canals of fluid that help us maintain our amazing balance.

Kommando: And our ears are ultra cute too.

Sgt Stripes: I found a list of seven kinds of sounds cats hate on Mr. Google. Let’s see how our new housemates compare to the list. The first one is hissing.

Kommando: Ooh, yeah. I hate it when Snoops hisses at me.

Snoops: I only do that when you’re annoying.

Kommando: Well, the kids are super annoying, but they don’t hiss.

Snoops: I guess we don’t annoy or scare them.

Sgt Stripes: The second sound we don’t like is banging. It says that we don’t like pots and pans banging or doors slamming.

Snoops: That one is a major issue. Those kids are always banging things around in the kitchen.

Kommando: And our food dishes! Mom got us those nice stainless steel dishes, and they’re all over the house.

Sgt Stripes: How traumatic!

Snoops: It is. We have to talk to Mom about it.

Sgt Stripes: The next thing on the list is high-frequency sounds, like the ones that come from computer screens and television remotes.

Snoops: They have tablets that are pretty annoying. Although they don’t use them all that much.

Kommando: No, but I really dislike Peppa Pig. She is super annoying.

Sgt Stripes: Apparently we also dislike balloons popping. Do they do that?

Kommando: No. I don’t think that’s a problem.

Sgt Stripes: I don’t think the next two are really an issue either. Some of us don’t like thunderstorms or fireworks either.

Snoops: I don’t think those are a problem.

Kommando: You sleep through almost anything.

Snoops: You’re just a scairdy-cat.

Kommando: I wish I knew how to hiss at you.

Sgt Stripes: I think the last one is a problem. It says that cats don’t like loud yelling or arguments. It says that the sounds coming from young children can be very stressful to kitties. We don’t like it when our humans are stressed out.

Kommando: The little humans are stressing us out!

Snoops: So what are we supposed to do?

Sgt Stripes: It says we’re supposed to find a  quiet place where we can calm down.

Kommando: I have a better idea. Let’s find a quiet place to put them.

Snoops: Let’s think about this.

18

World Toilet Day: Let’s Talk Litter

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Seven Steps to Toilet Training Your Cat | Hartz

Greetings everyone! We learned that tomorrow, November 19, is World Toilet Day. The United Nations is highlighting the sanitation crisis in much of the world. We really don’t know (or care) about humans and toilets, but it did getting us thinking about kitty waste.

Sand Cat Debuts at Smithsonian's ...

In the wild, cats usually try to find soft or sandy soil for their toilet. It allows for easy burial. Outdoor kitties use their paws in a backwards, sweeping motion to bury their leavings. A litter box tries to replicate this experience. Humans usually refer to litter boxes as a cat things, but other animals use them too. Rabbits, ferrets, miniature pigs, and small dogs have all been litter-trained. The difference is is that we cats generally do it instinctively. (The humans won’t say it, but we’re smarter.)

Lolcats - litter box - LOL at Funny Cat Memes - Funny cat pictures with words on them - lol | cat memes | funny cats | funny cat pictures with words

Humans like litter boxes because they contain our waste. We like litter boxes because we are generally clean animals and like to be able to cover up our waste. A clean litter box helps us be happy, healthy members of the family.

Lolcats - litter box - LOL at Funny Cat Memes - Funny cat pictures with words on them - lol | cat memes | funny cats | funny cat pictures with words

There are a wide variety of litters. Generally speaking, we kitties prefer unscented, low-dust varieties. We have sensitive noses that are easily offended by strong smells (unless it’s mackerel). We need two to three inches to allow for proper burial. And it should be scooped daily. The most common type of litter is clay-based. They also make silica-based litter. Silica is dangerous if you eat it. (Although we do not recommend eating any type of litter.) Other alternatives are wood chips, wheat, sawdust, grains, corncobs, and newspapers.  Some of it clumps for easier removal. We recommend you work with your human to find what’s best for you.

Where to Put a Litter Box: 6 Essential Considerations - Bob Vila

There are LOTS of litter boxes to choose from. Around here, you can spend anywhere from five dollars to several hundred dollars, depending on how fancy it is. The simplest ones are just a tray that your human fills with litter.  It should be big enough so you can comfortably get in it to do your business. You don’t want your tail hanging out the end. You also need to make sure the sides aren’t too high to enter and exit comfortably. Here are your choices:

Open Litter Box – These are the traditional litter trays. They are usually the least expensive, so they are a great choice if you need multiple boxes. Some kitties like them because they can keep an eye on what’s going on around them.
Whisker Litter-Robot 3 Connect Wi-Fi-Enabled Covered Automatic Self-Cleaning Cat Litter Box Beige LR3C-1000 - Best Buy
Covered Litter Box – Basically a tray with a lid. The lid helps keep the odors down, but it’s harder to clean. A good option for the more private cat.
Self-Cleaning Litter Box – These boxes have a raking mechanism that sifts through the litter and collects the waste into a tray. Your human just needs to dump the tray. But they make noise, and some kitties don’t like that.
Designer Catbox Cat Litter Box Enclosure, Hidden, Dog-Proof Pet Furniture with Cover, Elegant, Covered, Odor Contained for Large Cats, Cat Litter Box ...

Designer Litter Box – These are made for the discerning cat. They look like high-end furniture and match the rest of your human’s decor. Needless to say, they may be a little pricey. But you’re worth it.

Where to put the cat litter box?
Sifting Pan Litter Box –  One box with a grate on the bottom sits inside a slightly larger pan. Your human lifts the first box, shakes it a little, and lets the unused litter filter through the holes in the grate. Then they dump the dirty litter. We have a couple of these. Our humans like them better than the plain trays.
Disposable Litter Box – Every day, your human just throws everything away. The best ones are made of biodegradable materials that will disintegrate along with the waste.
FIRST RULE OF LITTER BOX CLUB - Lolcats - lol | cat memes | funny cats | funny cat pictures with words on them | funny pictures | lol cat memes | lol cats
Finally, make sure that your human has enough litter boxes for you and your furry siblings. There should be at least one litter box on every floor of a house. Additionally, each kitty should have their own litter box with a spare. Generally speaking, litter boxes should not be in sight of each other. (Note – we have two in one room and it really doesn’t bother us. But that’s just us.)
Cat laughing : r/cats

We will leave you with a couple of jokes:

A cat gives birth in a public park and is fined $50 for littering.

Why did the mother cat pick up her kittens? She didn’t want to litter

What do you call books written for cats? Kitty litter-ature

What do you call a cat that can’t use the litter box? Ill-litter-ate

Pet Releaf

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

21

A Kitty’s Thanksgiving Feast

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Wow. We can’t believe it’s less than two weeks until Thanksgiving here in the US. The humans keep talking about all the food they’re going to have. We decided that we would look into what it means for us cats. To be perfectly honest, it was a little disappointing.

Of course, the centerpiece (at least at our house) is going to be a turkey. We love turkey and were happy to hear that we are allowed to share the main course. There was a former cat here who would sit in the kitchen and wait on the table for the bird to come out of the oven. We’re not that bad, but turkey is yummy. But the science people say that we’re not supposed to eat the skin or bones. That sounds reasonable. But they also prefer if we avoid the dark meat because it has more fat. Hmmph! Like we’re going to get fat on one meal.

Can Cats Eat Turkey? - Cats.com

The rest of the meal doesn’t sound all that appetizing to us. But maybe some of the rest of you will be happy with the side dishes. Apparently, we’re supposed to eat them plain, no added sugars, salt, or butter. (We’re very disappointed – butter is our favorite part of veggies.)

Can Cats Eat Pumpkin? Veterinarians Explain | Trusted Since 1922

We can eat pumpkin and sweet potatoes. Pumpkin is full of all kinds of nutritious stuff that’s good for us. But no pumpkin pie! And no marshmallow on the sweet potatoes. Generally speaking, cats prefer their pumpkin and sweet potatoes pureed. After all, we don’t have the right kind of teeth for grinding. (Maybe a tiny bit of whipped cream wouldn’t be missed.)

Present Simple Negative | Baamboozle - Baamboozle | The Most Fun Classroom Games!

Apparently, some kitties really like veggies. Most of the lists we looked at said that we could be given green beans, carrots, spinach, broccoli, and cabbage. Steamed green beans are a favorite for some kitties. Most of the others are best if they are cooked at least a little bit, although some cats like raw carrots. None of us eat vegetables, but feel free to indulge if you’d like.

Can Cats Eat Apples? Are Apples Safe For Cats? | Cats, Cat facts, Pet news

Humans eat both apples and cranberries this time of year. You can try either if you are so inclined. Have your human seed the apples and cut them up small enough so you don’t choke (or make you unsweetened applesauce). Cranberries, on the other hand, are kind of sour. Your human should probably cook them and mix them with something a little sweeter like apple or pumpkin.

Truthfully, we really weren’t all that impressed with the human foods for Thanksgiving. So we found a few recipes that your human can make special for you.
Will Those Holiday Leftovers Poison Your Cat? - CatGazette
Turkey Triangles
  • 1/2 cup ground turkey
  • 1/2 cup whole wheat flour
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 tablespoon olive oil
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Farenheit.
  2. Mix the ingredients in a large bowl.
  3. Knead the dough into a ball.
  4. Spread flour over a flat workspace.
  5. Roll out the dough to 1/4″ thickness.
  6. Place the dough on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
  7. Score the dough into (cat) bite-sized triangles. Do not cut all the way through (Score 1/2″ wide rows, then diagonal cuts across the rows, finally diagonal cuts in the opposite direction.)
  8. Bake for 20 minutes.
  9. After cooling, snap into triangles.

Is it safe to feed fish to cats? | Honolulu Star-Advertiser

Tuna Yum Yums

  • 1/2 cup flour
  • 1/4 cup water
  • 1/2 cup of milk
  • 1/2 can of tuna
  • 1 tablespoon of vegetable or fish oil
  • 1 egg
  • 1 teaspoon of catnip (optional)
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Farenheit.
  2. Place parchment paper on a cookie sheet.
  3. Break the tuna into small pieces and mix in the flour and milk.
  4. Stir in the water and vegetable oil.
  5. Beat the egg in a separate bowl, then add to tuna mixture.
  6. Mix until dough-like.
  7. Shape the dough into small balls, about the size of blueberries, and place on the baking sheet.
  8. Cook the dough for 12 minutes or until golden brown. Stick a toothpick in to check that the treat is fully cooked.
  9. Cool for an hour before serving.

Fancy Feast Released a Cookbook of Companion Recipes for Humans

Kitty Casserole 

  • 1 can  tuna or salmon
  • 1 teaspoon honey
  • 1/2 can of your favorite food
  • 1 teaspoon dry cat food or treats
  1. Mix all of the wet ingredients together.
  2. Pour into a storage container.
  3. Top with dry food or treats.

We hope you have a terrific Turkey Day with lots of yummy treats followed by excellent naps.  Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

27

Fall Back and Get Ready for Nap Time

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Greetings fellow felines! This week is the end of Daylight Savings time here in the US. It’s the final sign that fall has fallen. If you’re like us, winter is the time for snuggling on electric blankets and hanging out on the humans. We thought we’d share some interesting stuff we found out about cats and sleep.

Cats sleep for about 2/3 of our lives – Young cats sleep about 16 hours each day, and older cats sleep up to 20 hours per day. Our main activity as wild cats was hunting which takes a LOT of energy. So we adapted to spend a lot of time storing up energy for the hunt and recovering from it.

Cats can snore – One of the previous cats here snored so loud, the humans could hear her across the room. Some breeds are more likely to snore (e.g., Persians, Himalayans), but a lot of times it just depends on the position we choose to sleep in. If our airway becomes partially blocked by our soft palate, we will snore. Generally, if we are snoring, we are really relaxed.

Cat experience REM sleep similarly to humans – REM stands for rapid eye movement, and it’s named that because of the way our eyes move behind our eyelids. It happens when we are in deep sleep. And it is a sign that we are dreaming. A lot of times our eyes and ears will twitch when we are in REM sleep. Studies have shown that we dream about 30-40% of the time we are asleep.

The weather can affect how much we sleep – Cats generally sleep more on wet, dreary days. Of course, there’s not much else to do when the weather is yucky.

Cats can go partially to sleep – We are far enough asleep to get rested, but alert enough to notice smells or sounds. When we’re in this state, we can wake up almost instantly to get away from danger. And of course, we are able to fall asleep easily in almost any circumstance. We can even sleep with our eyes open! (Or partially open.)

We sleep in a variety of positions:

The crescent – This is the most common position for kitties. You curl up on one side with your head bent towards your feet and your tail tucked in. It protects your tummy and keeps you warm. Because you feel safe, you can enjoy a nice, deep sleep. If we get too hot, we may relax a little and just sleep on our sides with our paws more relaxed.

Sheltered – Every cat loves a good box. Or drawer. Or nest of blankets or sweaters. We like sleeping in sheltered spaces because it keeps us safe from predators. Or toddlers.

Tummy Up – A cat who sleeps tummy up is a happy cat. You’re exposing your most vulnerable spots, so you trust your surroundings and are fully relaxed. Cats are more likely to sleep this way in the summer because it is a good way to cool down.

Loaf-Shape – We’ve all turned ourselves into a loaf at times. You’re upright with your paws and tail tucked it. It’s an excellent way to conserve heat in cold weather. It’s also good for protecting your vulnerable spots and being able to spring into action at a moment’s notice if there’s a threat.

Pretzel-Like – You know the position. You’re kinda  twisty with your paws going different ways. Cats do it when we’re relaxed. Your tummy is usually exposed and it’s hard to move quickly out of it. Humans think we’re super cute because they can’t bend that way.

Hiding our Face with Our Paws – We sleep like this to protect our eyes and nose. It also keeps out noise and light. It’s really comfortable. And we look really cute sleeping this way.

Sitting Up/Laying Flat – Yep. We can sleep in a sitting position. And laying flat on our stomachs. And pretty much any position in between. And we’re comfortable. Humans are very jealous of this trait.

Cuddle Puddle – A lot of like to sleep with fur siblings or humans. If we’re willing to sleep with someone, it’s a sign of deep trust and affection. Of course, sometimes, we sleep with others to stay warm.

Having said all of this, we are off to find a good spot to relax.

19

Sing Us a Song, You’re the Piano Cat

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       Hi everyone! It’s Sgt Stripes! I was going to make a post on the hassles of being an “administrative assistant supervisor”, but I want a few more weeks of purrfecting my skills before I go into that. So I decided to take a page from my cousin Thunder’s book, and do a musical blog. Except, instead of Christmas songs, I decided to reformat Billy Joel. Blondie listens to him a lot. He’s pretty good. But my lyrics are better, and I’m really excited to share them with you! (I wanted to rewrite every song. Blondie said no, that we’d be here well past nap time. So I selected my 10 favorites.) 

“Uptown Girl”– renamed “Uptown Cat”

“Uptown cat! I bet she’s never had to hunt a rat!

I bet she’s never had to slide on by, and steal a fish from some random guy!

I’m gonna try for an uptown cat!

She’ll be furry, and pretty, and black. She’ll be used to high luxury. And down feather beds on which she sleeps.

And then she’ll leap.

And when she’s purring, she’ll say that she’s mine.

And when she’s defurring, she’ll be so divine.

She’ll see I’m not so tough, just because I’m in love with an uptown cat!” 

“Vienna” 

“Calm down you crazy cat.

You roll so much that your fur has mats.

But then if you’re so groomed, tell me why are you still so scruffy?

Where’s the brush, where’s the nail clippers? You better find them now so you can fix your furs.

You’ve got so much to lose, and you don’t want to have to be shaved.

But you know when the truth is told that you can get what you want or you can sit and yowl.

You’re gonna kick off and scratch the human badly too. When will you realize, Vienna isn’t for you?

“You May be Right”– renamed “I’m Always Right” 

“Friday night I broke your vase

and Saturday I smashed your cake

and Sunday came and all I did was nap.

I was only having fun!

I wanted to lounge in the sun.

But the humans kept yelling and I stayed awake!

I’ve been stranded with some grumpy humans,

I feel a sense of settling doom and now I am annoyed and upset.

I will twitch my tail and hiss! T

he humans will give me a kiss!

And it’s all because they don’t want to play!

I’m always right! Just deal with it. Even when you are annoyed with me, you are wrong. Don’t try to fight!

I’m cute, I’ll win this.

I’m always right, you’re always wrong,

and life goes on.” 

 

“My Life”

“Saw a bag with my human, it had a new coat.

It was warm and furry and quite pristine.

He set down the bag and I wanted to take a look.

I decided the coat was bought for me.

I don’t need you to worry about me at night!

I’ve got this lovely coat to snuggle with.

It’s not as great as cuddles with you, but oh well!

This is my life and how I choose to live! I

never wanted you to spoil me with luxuries…

I never demanded the best things in life…

Don’t get me wrong, I deserve them all! Y

ou must give them to me, so I stay happy!”  

“Only the Good Die Young”- renamed “Only the Good Lie Down”

“Come out Onyx, don’t let me wait!

This nap is planned to take all day.

Sooner or later you’ll come out and play.

And then we’ll be best friends…

They got you a pillow, got you a bed.

Got you a nice place to lay your head.

But my bed is better than your bed, you and I could have fun…

only the good lie down!

That’s what I said… only the good lie down, only the good lie down.

You might have heard that I jump and I purr really loud.

But I’m a large kitty and of this I am proud.

I might be playing a bit too loud.

But that never hurt no one.

So come Onyx cat, show me a sign.

Send up a signal. I’ll throw you a line.

You can chase and pounce and jump on mine.

The things that we might have done…

Only the good lie down!”


“Why Should I Worry”

“One day I’m outside the house.

Then the next I’m upstairs inside.

I went from eating voles and a mouse, to getting kibble and silvervine.

I said ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh, I’m street smart, with a big heart.

I said ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh,

I’m street wise, and that is how I survived!

Why should I worry? Why should I care?

I have a human, he’ll take care of me here. Why should I worry?

Why should I care? I’m a spoiled kitty, and everyone is aware.

The rhythm of the farm house, oh once you get it down, you will be a king cat, you can wear a crown!

Why should I worry? Why should I care?

I have a human, he’ll take care of me here. Why should I worry? Why should I care?

I’m a spoiled kitty, and everyone is aware.” 

“The Entertainer”– renamed “Big Time Hunter”

“I am a big time hunter!

And I know just where to pounce.

I’m mastered at getting voles, I’m working on a mouse.

Today you won’t go hungry. Because I got a kill.

But I gotta go out and I gotta shout my hunting cry, and then I’ll sigh when I’m back in the house.

I am a big time hunter. The nip has nothing on me.

I am going to be successful as a hunter kitty. I

’ll go out to the garden. And get some juicy bugs.

And I’ll bring them to mom with a joyful song and I will not care when she fluffs her hair and lets the bugs run on the rug. 

“Big Shot”– renamed “Big Cat”

“Well, you arched your back and you hissed at me, and fluffed your tail up too.

You thought you’d act so big that everyone would be afraid of you. A

nd you growled and mewed and hunkered back, trying to act scary.

But just know that everyone thinks that you’re a sweet kitty cat.

You had to be a big cat, didn’t ya, trying to scare off everyone? You had to be a big cat, didn’t ya, oh your tail is so fluffed up!

You had to have the last hiss last night, so much fun to be around.

You had to have the bright hot spotlight, you had to be a big cat didn’t’ ya? Ohhh.”

“Scenes From an Italian Restaurant”

“A bottle of milk. A bottle of cream.

Perhaps a bottle of the finest tuna juice, please.

We’ll get a table near the stream so we can catch fresh fish and sleep curled up, nice and warm…

a bottle of milk, a bottle of cream.

Some fresh catnip would be nice this evening.

We’ll curl up nice and warm on the table near the door, in our Italian restaurant. 

“River of Dreams”

“In the middle of the night. I wake from my sleep.

Having the urge to get some freshly cooked meat.

I go stalking and searching. My tummy rumbling loud.

I try to wake my human. But he is snoring loud.

And I stare and I think about how I must get some food…

and then a kibble dish appears in my sight, thank goodness for you! I

n the middle of the night, I wake my from my sleep.

Having the urge to get some freshly churned cream.

I am quite thirsty. After my kibble feast.

But all I can find is water.

This I will have to keep. In the middle of the night!” 

I hope you enjoyed reading my interpretations of Mr. Joel’s songs as much as I enjoyed writing them (my typist would like to apologize to Mr. Joel in advance. I don’t know why. She just doesn’t get it)!

20

Sgt Stripes Makes a Friend

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Hi, everybody! Sgt Stripes here. Guess what! I have two new friends, one human and one feline. I was really lonely last week because my main human went to a place called Italy for 10 days and left me all alone (except for Mom and the new human/cats). I thought I had been deserted

Then one of the new kitties moved upstairs. I guess she was supposed to be locked in one of the bedrooms until the humans had a chance to introduce us, but she escaped. She must be pretty smart. Her name is Onyx. She’s a really pretty black cat. And she smells really good.

She seems kinda shy. We sat together for a little bit one day. The next day, I sniffed her again, and she seemed to get a little offended. She went under the bed. I guess I’m going to have to keep trying to charm her.

I think she might be a little intimidated because I’m a lot bigger than she is. But I’m patient, so I’m sure we’ll be spending more time together soon. She doesn’t hiss at me like Snoops does, so I think she kinda likes me.

I really like her human mom. Snoops says they used to call her Blondie. I don’t really know why. Her hair isn’t blonde. Snoops says it used to be. She’s their human sister, so I guess she’s my human sister now too. Although my main human is her brother. I don’t know. It’s all really confusing to me. For the purposes of identifying her, I guess I’ll call her Blondie too.

She’s the mom to the two small humans. I’m not sure about them. The one seems pretty okay. He comes in once in a while and wants to pet me. He’s pretty gentle. The little one is another story. He is so LOUD and he cries a lot when he’s tired. He scares me. I try not to go near him.

Back to Blondie. She’s working from home now. And she sends the kids away during the day. Snoops says it’s some kind of shelter, and she hopes they stay there one day. I’m not really sure what a shelter is, but Snoops says she used to live in one. Mom says it’s called a daycare, so I’m guessing they’re not allowed to stay there at night. When I told Snoops, she was pretty disappointed.

Anyway, Blondie has been working upstairs since Onyx moved up. And it’s pawsome. She lets me stay in the room with her ALL DAY. And she lets me help her work. She does some kind of medical office job. We talk to patients and work on the computer. The best part is that she does something called Zoom calls. I get to see people on the computer. My brother does those sometimes too. I love Zoom calls.

Yesterday I learned how to schedule patients for some kind of testing. It’s pretty cool. Blondie uses a lot of different computer programs, and I’m learning them all. I already know how to change programs and shut them down. Pretty soon I’ll be really good at this stuff and ready to learn something else. The best part is that when I get cold, she lets me cuddle up with her.

My regular human returned yesterday, so now I have all sorts of options. I can help him with his school work. (He’s in something called grad school. I’m not really sure what that is, but it seems to take up a lot of time.) He spends a lot of time on the computer too. Or I can keep helping Blondie. And of course, I have to spend time with Mom. I don’t want her to feel deserted.

This is so exciting! I don’t even miss the lady cats anymore.

30

Global Cat Day: Some Fun Facts

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Premium AI Image | A group of cats celebrating a special day with party hats surrounded by balloons and confetti

Greetings! Monday, October 16 is Global Cat Day which means that ALL of our readers can celebrate. Don’t confuse it with International Cat Day which was August 8. We’re not sure why there’s two holidays that are basically the same. But we deserve them. We recommend treats, cuddles, and all-around pampering.

Sgt Stripes loves to work with Mr. Google. He has found some trivia to share with your human.

  • Cats are digitigrade. We can walk on our toes.
  • The average weight for a house cat is 6-10 pounds (2.7-4.5 kg). And we average 20-28 inches (50.8-71.1 cm) long. Mancats are generally bigger than the ladies.
  • We can bristle (fluff up) because of tiny erector muscles at the base of our hair follicles. It helps us look bigger when we want to frighten someone. (We have learned that this behavior does not work with human toddlers.)

Moment of Meow

  • We can twist our bodies around because our vertebrae (our backbone) are held together by muscles. Humans have ligaments between theirs which are nowhere near as flexible. That’s why we can stretch and contract our backs. And arch them up to scare off intruders.
  • We don’t have any crushing teeth (like molars in humans). We cut up our food when we eat it, rather than chewing it.
  • Our eyes are extra sensitive to light because of something called guanine. It coats our eyes and lets us see in extremely low light. It’s also what makes our eyes glow.

Why do cats' eyes glow in the dark? | Optimax

  • There are over 100 different cat breeds.
  • We have the largest eyes, in relation to our body size, of any mammal. This lets us see approximately 280 degrees. (A full circle is 360 degrees.) That’s why it’s so hard to sneak up on us. (We also have excellent hearing.)
  • The average lifespan of an indoor cat is 15 years, but only 5 years for an outdoor cat. The oldest cat known lived 36 years.

Why Do Cats Land on Their Feet? | Purina® Canada

  • A cat can jump 5 times as high as its tail.
  • Cats respond more quickly to names that end in the “ee” sound. (We do not know who studied this or really believe it. We do not respond to anything we do not want to respond to.)
  • Cats have over 100 different vocalization sounds while dogs have approximately a dozen. We are obviously more articulate.

  • We purr at the same frequency as an idling diesel engine (approximately 26 cycles per second). We are much quieter.
  • We sleep more than any other mammal – an average of 16 hours per day. (Humans just aren’t that interesting.)
  • A cat’s nose pad is ridged in a unique pattern, like a human fingerprint.

Cats in Japanese Culture and History | KCP International

Cats have been living with humans for thousands of years. There’s some disagreement whether we first joined the hunter-gatherers as companions or waited until humans settled in one place and moved in as pest control. In either case, we are extremely popular these days. These countries have the most cats:

  1. United States – 76.5 million
  2. China – 53 million
  3. Russia – 12.75 million
  4. Brazil – 12.5 million
  5. France – 9.5 million
  6. Italy 9.5 million
  7. United Kingdom – 7.75 million
  8. Germany – 7.75 million (we know it’s a tie with the UK; the computer won’t let us have 2 #7s)
  9. Ukraine – 7.5 million
  10. Japan – 7.25 million

How Cats Tamed Us | The New Yorker

We don’t know who counted the cats. We’ve never taken part in a census. But that’s a lot of cats.

In Istanbul, Cats Are Sacred - Here Are Photos of the City's Cutest Stray Cats

Finally, wanted to give a meow-out to a few places that really love cats:

  • Mykonos Isle, Greece – The island is famous for it’s cats, and every street in the main town of Chora has its own kitty mascot.
  • Rome, Italy – The Torre Argentina Cat Sanctuary has almost 300 cats living among the temple ruins.
  • Istanbul, Turkey – The Stray Cat Hostel is a cat-themed hostel where you can stay free if you add to the artwork. Istanbul is known as a haven for stray cats.
  • Key West, Florida – Ernest Hemingway’s home (now a museum) is home to more than 40 polydactyl cats.
  • Moscow, Russia – home to the Moscow Cat Theater and Cat Temple where you can watch cats perform or visit the 200 cats who live in the temple.

We hope you appreciate all the hard work Sgt Stripes put into his research. And hope you and your human enjoy Global Cat Day!

Pictures courtesy of Google Images.

19

Cat Council: Dealing with Toddler Trauma

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Snoops: I call this meeting of the Cat Council to order. We need to discuss what’s happening in our home.

Kommando: Should we invite the new cats? They’ve been living with the invaders.

Snoops: Nah. They’re still in quarantine. Let’s deal with one problem at a time.

Sgt Stripes: I’m excited. You ladies usually ignore me.

Snoops:  We need all the brain power we can muster. This is huge.

Sgt Stripes: I did some research on the invaders. I love Mr. Google.

Kommando: Did it say anything about why they sound like howler monkeys?

Sgt Stripes: Not that I remember.

Snoops: It’s kinda true. They get started crying and it just gets really loud.

Sgt Stripes: I have noticed that. I can hear them through the floor. And the doors.

Kommando: We can even hear them in the basement.

Snoops: I wonder if they have “off” buttons?

Kommando: We should ask their Mom. Maybe she just needs to find it.

Snoops: Maybe she can find the self-cleaning button too.

Kommando: Yeah. They’re even messier than you when they eat.

Snoops: I’m not messy.

Kommando: You’re the reason we have mats under our bowls.

Snoops: I can’t help it that I have a more delicate face and don’t want it to get full of food.

Kommando: Whatever. At least you don’t leave a trail. I keep crunching crumbs under my paws.

Snoops: They don’t ever leave good stuff either. There’s never any chicken or fish laying around.

Sgt Stripes: They have kinda smelly milk too.

Snoops: I heard it’s called “oat” milk.

Kommando: What kind of cow is an “oat”?

Snoops: I don’t think it’s a cow. It smells weird.

Sgt Stripes: Nothing at all like cat milk.

Kommando: They have stuff in most of our lounging spots too. It’s really hard to get a good spot on the table anymore.

Snoops: Yeah. And there’s stuff on the sofa and chairs too.

Sgt Stripes: Too bad you guys don’t come upstairs. I lost my own bedroom, but they have a couple of beds I use regularly. Besides, when Mom cleaned the spare room, she found a huge comfy cat bed.

Snoops: I think that was mine!

Sgt Stripes: Hmm. Key word is “was”.

Snoops: Don’t give me another reason to dislike you.

Kommando: On the bright side, they’re not as grabby as I thought they might be.

Snoops: That’s true. The bigger one has petted me a couple of times, but that’s it

Sgt Stripes: I try to avoid them. But they don’t chase me, and their Mom pets me. So it’s OK.

Snoops: Yeah. I agree. Not great. But OK.

Kommando: Did Mr. Google tell you anything interesting about them?

Sgt Stripes: I learned a few interesting things:

  • Toddlers don’t really understand that they can hurt us. They don’t know that pulling our tails, or picking us up wrong, or throwing things at us can hurt us.
  • Adult humans shouldn’t leave their toddlers alone with us. They need to teach them the right way to treat us.
  • The big humans should make sure that we don’t get too stressed. If they pay attention, they can remove us before we get into a fight with the toddler.
  • There should always be a safe space for us to go and hide.

Snoops: That stuff all sounds good. Because if someone pulls my tail, I am not going to be a happy cat. and someone is going to know it.

Kommando: I think we should Mom for a new kitty condo to hide in. It seems like the least she could do for us.

Snoops: That’s an excellent idea.

Sgt Stripes: And some shelves to hide on.

Snoops: So we’re all agreed. Mom need to make this up to us.

Agreement all around.