Tag Archives: Work

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You WILL be Friendly

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One of the first meetings I attended at Ralph’s was a “Friendly Meeting”. I sarcastically asked whether they were going to teach us how to be friendly.  As it turns out, that would have been a lot more useful than what actually happened. The store director began by telling us that since we can’t compete on price, we need to succeed on customer service. It appears that after cutting staffing as far as possible, taking away merit raises, and putting a cap on the number of automatic increases an employee can receive in any position, they were still losing customers based on price. So they decided to do something radical: be nice to the customers.

There are a few rules: smile and say hello to everyone, ask whether you can help them find anything, and never (ever, ever) point them in the right direction. You must always take the customer to the item they are looking for. Some customers take well to an employee saying hello at 6am; others give a look that says, “If I wanted to talk, I wouldn’t be here at 6am”. Nobody said anything about how to handle the people who take it as an invitation to start a lengthy discussion about their eating habits and why they only eat “x” type of foods. But I’m friendly so….

At the beginning it was easy to not point people in the right direction; I didn’t know where it was either. As time went by, I learned that people don’t necessarily want someone walking them to the item (I would hate it). They want information, not a shopping partner. A few even got offended by the idea: “I can find it myself.” (If that were true, why are you asking?) Now the only people I take are the ones who still look confused after I’ve explained where it is multiple times. They are always very sweet and say something along the lines of “Thank you so much – I never would have found it without you.” There really isn’t any way for me to answer other than “thank you” without sounding unfriendly.

We have meetings every quarter to discuss how friendly we are. Last year, all was well. We consistently met or exceeded our target. We all got cards that entered us in a drawing for a $25 gift card. (How’s that for motivation?) We must have gotten complacent because this year, disaster struck. In late spring we found out that our customers were not at all happy, and that we were 15 points below company standards friendly-wise. We had to fix the problem!

It was also at this meeting that we learned that there are actually 4 pieces to the “friendly score”: checkout friendly, floor friendly (that’s where I am), store cleanliness, and product availability. As it happened, the checkout was 10 points above target and the floor was 15 points over. The two problem areas were store cleanliness and product availability. Nobody stated the obvious: the employees at the meeting were doing fine; somebody needed to tell those wilting veggies to get their act together.

As usual in the world of Ralph, anything that might impact management’s bonus or tenure was a crisis. Over the next couple of days, we would get messages over the speaker system: “Our friendly score is X; remember to be friendly!” Every hour or so they would update the number. The customers must have thought we were nuts. All the while, the floor had streaks and the strawberries grew moldy.

I’m really not sure whether the situation improved or another crisis has arisen, but friendly is not the focus. At the last meeting, we talked about the United Way campaign. Why not? It has as much to do with me being friendly as the black marks on the floor.

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Just a Cold

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Why do we say, “I just have a cold,” when someone asks why they can’t understand a word coming out of our mouths? Are we trying to separate it from the Dengue Fever going around the neighborhood? Are we ashamed that we don’t have something more impressive?

I have never met someone with a cold who was not totally miserable. (Some of them were that way before the virus, so they don’t really count.) But we have made it some type of badge of honor to go on as if nothing were wrong. As in, “I came to work today; it’s only a cold.” Well you look like something the dog dragged in from the dumpster, thanks for wanting to share it with me. They sit next to you, coughing and blowing their noses, not noticing that you’re about to gag. Honestly, nothing you do here is so important that you can’t miss a day or two.

Then you have places like my store. Without sick time (and with low wages), the average employee really can’t afford to stay home. It works out well for the company – turnover is so high that there really isn’t anyone else to do the job. Besides, the odds are that you are making the customers sick, not the other employees. So it’s kind of a win-win for the company. The odds of the customer figuring out it was an employee making them sick, rather than the toddler coughing all over everything, are pretty low. Usually people write it off to “something going around”.  I always picture little viruses dressed like spies in the cartoons.

So you can probably tell that I have been sick, and am pretty grouchy about the whole thing. It started with a sore throat. You need to understand that I live in Michigan. There is ‘something in the air’ here, and that something makes it impossible to breathe clearly for approximately half the year (the other half is extremely cold so you more worried about your nose falling off than working correctly). I’m not sure what sinuses are supposed to do, but it must have something to do with carrying around extra gunk your body doesn’t need. I know people who have gotten off the plane saying they felt fine when they left home, but are now sick. Generally, they have a miraculous recovery once they get home.

I remember reading somewhere that the government sent out scouts after the Civil War to find places for the expanding population to inhabit. The report came back from Michigan that it was dismal and swampy; basically unfit for human habitation. I’m guessing they came in early spring when the weather changes constantly and everyone looks and feels groggy. I would have liked to remind them that Washington, DC is built on a swamp. And they are the same people who had granted us statehood thirty-some years earlier.

I’m telling you all of this not to slam Michigan. It’s beautiful, I love it, and I wouldn’t live anywhere else. But to explain why I could have a sore throat for a week and not really think anything of it. So I go to church and see a friend. He laughs and says something about my sinuses. I tell him that for once it’s not in my head, it’s in my throat (is that technically part of the head?). It’s been getting worse, and I think it may be infected. I make it through the service. (I bet God knows I didn’t actually understand anything that was going on). My friend tells me to go home and see a doctor if it really is an infection. I am happy to report that my friends are generally people with some common sense, not the sort who hear sore throat and immediately think diphtheria.

Of course, I don’t see a doctor. I always feel like I should be sicker before I go. By Tuesday, I feel a lot better. I knew it! I wasn’t sick enough to see a doctor! Unfortunately, on Wednesday I didn’t feel quite so well. By Friday, I could barely talk and felt like someone was shoving an ice pick in my ear. I broke down and called the doctor. Turns out whatever was in my throat had decided to move into my ears. They were both infected. I had no idea adults even got ear infections (kinda stupid when I realized that I still get skinned knees and other things that adults should be ‘beyond’).

One of the things that causes problems with ear infections is drastic change in temperature (something about a change in pressure – I think I should have paid more attention in Physics). Working in and out of a cheese cooler is not optimal. So I took a day off. But it wasn’t because I had a cold.

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The Peasants are Rioting in the Streets

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It is doubtful that Marie Antoinette ever said, “Let them eat cake.” For one thing, by the time things were quiet enough to write things down, everyone who would have been present had been separated from his/her head and was unable to verify the quote. It’s too bad they didn’t have Facebook (the Queen sounds like the type who would have loved tagging pictures). It appears that things stay on there forever.

The exchange kept coming to mind last week at work. You may recall me talking about a woman who was told that she couldn’t take a vacation because they are too short-staffed in the deli. She has chosen to retire at the beginning of December. She’s decided that if they are that short-staffed, once winter arrives she’ll be stuck by herself on the days when everyone else is either sick or staying home because of the snow . I’m guessing that was not the company’s goal when they denied the vacation.

I learned that a couple of Saturdays ago, they were short-staffed (surprise!!), There were only three people on the counter, scheduled in such a way that one person would be alone at the end of her shift. It was so busy, that they weren’t able to take their breaks. When they called management to say they needed coverage for lunch, management told them to stay on the counter. The best part was that the team leader left before noon because she had to go to a birthday party. (They probably ate cake.)

The union steward reprimanded the team leader and manager. I’m sure the employees felt much better knowing that management is now aware that employees should be allowed to go to lunch. Apparently, Ralph’s does not know that the Department of Labor also has an issue with making people work for 8 hours without a break. (I think France had indentured servants prior to the Revolution, so we’re still on track).

Moving on to Tuesday, one of the male stockers came in and said he needed the rest of the week off because his grandmother was having surgery (that’s more time than he would have gotten if she died). The team leader said he would have to tell the manager, apparently thinking this would dissuade him from leaving. The manager looked at him in disbelief and let him go. I guess the way to get time off is just to say you are going.

He decided that he could be back on Friday.  The team leader switched the other stocker’s day off from Wednesday to Friday to cover. When the first stocker came back, he was angry because he didn’t have any help on his busiest day. Guess he didn’t get the message about being short-staffed. He lost all sympathy when we discovered that the surgery was for a knee infection, not something life-threatening. The team leader lost all sympathy when she welcomed him back like a returning hero.

One of the people who needs to keep filling the staffing holes has a job similar to mine, except in the “fine” cheese (you can pronounce all the ingredients, but not the names of the cheeses). The team leader kept asking for “favors”. Finally the woman ignored one of the “requests”. The team leader told her she had to see the manager NOW. I guess it’s like being sent to the principal’s office.

Finally, I was sick on Thursday (one point on my record, no pay). Of course, no one could cover. On Friday, the manager comes by and says that the vice-president is expected and I need to fill in the holes before I do anything else. I’m not sure what he meant – the whole section was holes. Not that it matters. In the (almost) two years I’ve been there, she has never even looked in my direction on one of her tours. And she didn’t look this time either.

I really think all we need is a leader and something to tear down.

 

 

 

 

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My Family is Not THIS Dysfunctional

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I saw Ralph (as in Ralph’s Mega-Mart) on TV the other night. They were interviewing him about a new store opening and asked him about his formula for success. He said that one of the keys to his success is that all of his employees are treated like family. I wonder what type of family he grew up in.

The father of one of my co-workers recently died. When my Team Leader heard the news, her response was “But I need her here on Saturday!!” I’m sure that if someone had explained the situation to the poor man, he would have planned things a little better. Of course, this is the same Team Leader who resigned a few weeks later because the stress was making her sick. It appears that employee support is not considered a family value.

Recently the company introduced a new program. It is called Personal Responsibility for Your Behavior (or something close to that – the real name faded once I realized that the message might be new to a 10-year-old). We work in a very “us vs them” environment. If we are more than a minute late arriving, punching in from break or punching in from lunch, we receive a 1/2 point on our record. If we call in sick, we receive 1 point on our record. If we no call/no show, we receive 4 points on our record. If we behave inappropriately or unsafely we receive points on a different record. If either record reaches 12 points in a year, we are subject to termination (kind of death by boredom by that point).

The new policy said that it is our responsibility to control the number of points we accrue. If we went four months with no points, we would get a face-to-face meeting with our manager (!!) so that person could tell us what a good employee we have been. So, if you’re bad, you get points; if you’re good, you get to talk to your manager. And you are responsible for which one happens!!!

As part of a “family” we need to make sure that everyone is safe. So we have quarterly safety updates and videos and readings. The bottom line is – if you get hurt, it’s your own fault. One new employee hurt his back moving a pallet, then got hurt lifting some boxes, then ran a pallet jack over his foot. He was terminated for being a “safety risk”. Of course, no one explained to him why he kept getting hurt –  he had sat through the 9 hours (no joke) of video training before they let him out on the floor. If management had been paying attention at all, they would have told him that taking mind-altering substances at work will lead to lapses in judgment that could affect your health (and safety).

They don’t really have anything that counts as “light” duty. If you are not able to do your job fully, you have the option of toughing it out (and having your co-workers complain that you are not pulling your weight), taking time off (without pay), or becoming a greeter. Greeters are those people who say hello and good-bye as you enter and leave the store (in case you couldn’t figure it out yourself). Greeting is the most boring job on earth (or at least at Ralph’s). They can’t tell you ahead of time when you will be working – as far as I can tell you either take the place of an ill greeter, a vacationing greeter, or a greeter who is injured themselves and has to stay home.

Ralph’s prides itself on hiring people at $0.25 over minimum wage (that’s $10/week closer to the bottom of the poverty line if you work full-time). However, if you are a cashier or service worker, you lose that extra money. Apparently dealing directly with customers all day is not considered as difficult as putting bags of cheese on a hook. Of course, no one is hired full-time so all of this is relative anyway. I wonder what kind of allowance Ralph’s kids get?

If you have the audacity to leave and then want to come back (regardless of how long you have been gone), you have to re-join the family. You have to complete the drug screening (probably a good idea since you know what you’re coming back to), the hours of video training and the on-the-floor training. The best part is that even if you have only been gone a few weeks, your pay drops back to the starting salary and you have no seniority toward vacation, 401(k) match or anything else. You have to be really desperate to return to our family.

Our equivalent to “Wait til your father gets home” is the senior management visit. Whenever someone important is supposed to come, we have to clean, make sure everything is tidy, and stock everything (you would think that would be the norm, not a special occurrence). The higher up the chain of command the visitor, the more stressed out the store director becomes, and the more unpleasant it is for everyone. Does anyone really think that the VIPs don’t know what’s going on? Maybe they are as clueless as some parents.

Thinking about it, maybe Ralph read too many Victorian novels about families. There seem to be a lot of stories with rich families who take in poor relations and seem to be helping them while ensuring that none of the wealth actually gets to the relations.

At any rate, my second ‘family’ is not coming to my house for Thanksgiving.

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Random Thoughts

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I drive country roads to work – why do I only run into slow drivers on the straight parts and never on the parts that resemble a NASCAR track?

Why do they name it head cheese when that’s the only disgusting part of the animal that is not in it?

Why do I only see predators (animal, not human) when they have some poor animal in their mouth/talons?

Should I be insulted that when I was pulled over for driving erratically, the cop assumed it was for a medical emergency not for being under the influence?

Why am I the only one on the sales floor when someone breaks a bottle of (really cheap) strawberry wine or a gallon of milk or a jar of horseradish? They really are the only things in the store that make me really gag. (Aside from human emissions of various sorts.)

Why do I attract all of the really strange people? Do I really look like I know what to substitute for spicy paprika (or know what spicy paprika is)? How about all the stores that carry the products that we don’t? The guy who feels he needs to tell me his life story before asking for money?

If my mother knows that I am liberal in almost everything, why does she insist on telling me everything she has “learned” on Fox News?

Does my car have a sign that says pull out in front me, there’s only a quarter mile of empty space behind me?  Or maybe, it’s icy so test my reflexes by cutting in front of me and slamming on your brakes?

Why do people insist on telling the same awful jokes over and over? (“Where’s the cheese? Where’s the cheese? Oh here it is.” as he enters the aisle.)

Why do I only have the nerve to complain online or at home when those are never the people who need to hear it?