Tag Archives: fire

23

Charlemagne T Persian, Grill Master

|

Dont Show Your Cat on Twitter: "my boy can work a grill https://t.co/KBUtdyLghu" / Twitter

Mama Cat rushed in from work. It had been a long day. She wondered why she didn’t smell dinner.

Mama Cat: Celeste, where’s Daddy? He’s supposed to be making dinner tonight.

Celeste: He’s out back on the patio.

Mama Cat: What’s he doing out there? Isn’t he going to cook?

Celeste: He wants to try out his Father’s Day gift.

Mama Cat: Seriously? Tonight?

Celeste: He’s really excited. Tommy’s out there with him.

Pros and Cons of Outdoor Litter Boxes I Modkat

Mama Cat shook her head. Her husband, Charlemagne (or Charlie), had asked for a grill for Father’s Day. She thought he was crazy, but the kids wanted to get it for him. She had never heard of a cat grilling, but he seemed thrilled when he opened it. She walked out the back door.

Mama Cat: Charlie! You’re not really going to use that thing are you?

Tommy: Hi, Mom! Dad’s almost ready to start. Wanna watch?

Mama Cat watched her large, fluffy husband as he added the last of the charcoal to the grill. He was usually so elegant, but now his paws were covered in soot.

Why Do Cats Lick Their Paws? | Hill's Pet

Charlie: Hi, Maggie! You’re just in time! I’m getting ready to fire it up!

Maggie: I’m not sure that’s a good idea. What if your fur catches fire? I don’t think cats were meant to grill.

Charlie: Didn’t you watch any of the videos I sent you on CatView? It’s the hottest thing with all the hipster cats. I think I’m the first one in our neighborhood. It’s going to be legendary!

Maggie: If you don’t set yourself on fire.

Tommy: He’s not going to set himself on fire, Mom. He’s got one of those long, lighter things to start the fire.

Charlie: OK, everyone. Stand back. Here I go.

cat cooking barbecue | Funny animals, Funny animal pictures, Funny cat pictures

He held the flame to the charcoal. There was a “whoosh” sound, and a large flame.

Maggie: Charlemagne! Was it supposed to do that?

Charlie: Calm down, Maggie! I might have used a little too much starter fluid, but it stayed in the grill. Now we just have to wait for it to burn down to coals so I can cook the fish.

He pointed at a couple of salmon steaks he had prepared in a flat basket.

Charlie: All I have to do is put the basket on the coals and turn it over a couple of times to cook the fish. It’s going to be great!

Maggie wasn’t sure.

5 Vegetables Cats Can Eat (And 5 To Avoid!) - Cats.com

Maggie: All right. What do you have to go with the fish?

Charlie: Go with it? Like what?

Maggie: Maybe some kind of side dish?

Charlie: It’s barbecue. It’s all about the meat.

Tommy: Or fish.

Charlie: Yeah. The fish.

Maggie went back in the house to wait with Celeste. Before long, they were in with the fish.

Is it safe to feed fish to cats? | Honolulu Star-Advertiser

Celeste: Daddy, this is yummy!

Tommy: Yeah. It’s great.

Maggie: I admit, it does taste good.

Charlie: See? The grill was a great idea.

Maggie sniffed.

Maggie: What’s that smell?

Charlie: What smell?

Sniffing Kitty - Love Meow

Celeste: It kinda smells like something’s still cooking. It’s smoky.

Charlie: I don’t know. I don’t smell anything.

Maggie: That’s because it’s you. The smoke got in your fur. Your beautiful thick fur is full of smoke.

Charlie: Well, that’s a small price to pay for that great fish. Right, kids?

Celeste and Tommy nodded. They really liked the fish.

Tommy: Can you grill some more tomorrow?

Cat Awake at Night - Reducing Nocturnal Activity ~ Pelaqita

Maggie: I’m not going to sleep next to you if you’re going to smell like smoked fish.

Charlie: Fine. I’ll go sit outside until it blows out of my fur. But I love my new grill, and I’m going to keep using it.

Charlie practiced with his grill for the next few weeks and was getting really good with it. Some of the other cats in the neighborhood started to comment on the wonderful smells coming out of his backyard.

Charlie: Hey, Maggie. I think we should have a party for the neighbors. I want to show off my new skills.

Maggie: I guess we could do that. How many fish do you think we’ll need?

The Name for A Group of Cats Explained

Charlie: I don’t want to do fish. I think I’m ready for something a little bigger.

Maggie: What did you have in mind?

Charlie: I saw a guy grilling a turkey. I want to try that.

Maggie: I don’t think that’s a good idea for a party. You’ve only been doing this a few weeks. You’re really good at fish and burgers. Let’s do that.

Charlie: No. I want a turkey.

Maggie: Charlemagne, that sounds really hard.

Charlie: I have the video. How hard can it be?

Next week: Charlemagne learns that grilling a turkey is different than grilling a fish.

Will Those Holiday Leftovers Poison Your Cat? - CatGazette

Pictures courtesy of Google Images. 

20

“And the Home of the Brave (Cat)”

|

Cats Can Be Your Hero. Cats Who Saved The Humans They Love ...

In honor of the United State’s Independence Day, we were going to tell you about some cats who served in the military. But since there is no record of George Washington having cats with his troops, we decided to look a little farther to see what we could find.

German cats were messengers during the World Wars. And cats are excellent at sniffing out drugs and bombs. But we decided to focus closer to home. We found five cats who displayed great bravery at home.

cats and dogs fighting quotes - Google Search | Cat quotes funny ...

First, we have Tara. She was outside with her small human (4 years old), when he was attacked by several dogs. Without a thought for her own safety, Tara ran into the group of dogs. She hissed, growled, and attacked the dogs until they ran away. The boy ran into the house and is fine. We assume he is now a “cat person” for life.

23 Funny Animal Pictures Of The Day | Funny animal photos, Cute ...

Next we have Jack. Jack is a cat who knows how to protect his turf. When a bear wandered into his yard, Jack was not pleased. He went into full attack mode. Jack chased the bear out of his yard and up a neighbor’s tree. We assume the bear went home and told his friends to avoid the crazy cat’s yard.

Buidling On Fire? Cat Meme - Cat Planet | Cat Planet

Next, we have Baby. Baby’s human parents were sleeping on the sofa when Baby smelled smoke in the back bedroom. She went into the front room and wouldn’t stop crying and pawing them until the humans woke up. Everyone was fine, and the mom had twins a few weeks later. Baby probably doesn’t have to worry about her humans sleeping too soundly anymore.

Cat-tain planet. He's a hero. | Cat memes, Cat pics, Funny cats

Schnautzie started her career as a hero early. When she was just a kitten, she smelled something strange. She went in to wake up her human parents. They were a little difficult to wake up, but she didn’t stop nuzzling them and crying until they wre awake. It was lucky that sh e was so persistent. She saved the family from a possible explosion due to a gas leak. With a little fresh air, the family was fine.

15 Cats Who Are Waking You Up For An Important Task... (Memes) - I ...

Last, but not least, is Pudding. He had just settled in for his first night in his new forever home. Suddenly, his human ,Mom started to act strangely. He didn’t know what was going on, so he went over to his human and tried to make her stop. He was so persistent that she oused herself from a diabetic seizure to call out to her son. He called 911, and she is fine. Puddinghas no worries about ever losing his forever home.

Just thinking about these brave cats makes us proud to be feline. It also makes us very tired.

Exhausted Cat - Tap the link now to see all of our cool cat ...

Pictures courtesy of Google Images. 

10

On Dragons, By Dragons (Part 2)

|

Image result for chinese dragon

So far: Donnie Dragon asked his father why people don’t believe that dragons exist. His father is explaining how they became invisible. Part 1 is here.

The next night, Donnie asked his father to continue his story.

For many years, the dragons thought they had a safe home in Asia. Then they noticed something.

Every time a dragon was sick, a crowd of people appeared. If the dragon recovered, they went home. If the dragon died, a few people would wait for the bones to turn to ash and collect them.

Image result for dragon medicine

The humans believed that the bones had special powers they could use. The dragons were offended that they could not mourn in private. The dragons were angry, but the people would not stop.

Things were different in the West. For some reason, those people decided that we were evil from the beginning. It may have been the result of a couple of unfortunate incidents in England.

First, a sick dragon was flying home. He sneezed and accidentally set a village on fire. The humans decided that it was intentional, and dragons could not be trusted.

Then a young male dragon fell in love with a beautiful human girl. He took her to his lair against her will. Her father killed the dragon and took his daughter home.

Image result for knight fighting dragon

It was a huge scandal. The humans used the event as more proof that dragons could not be trusted. The dragons were angry that the humans killed one of them without asking why it happened.

The stories spread from one human village to another. With each telling, the story got worse. Eventually, people believed that the dragon had come down from his lair and set the village on fire. In the confusion, he had kidnapped all the young women and took them home to eat. Only the courage of one man had saved them.

Image result for dragon eating

Donnie interrupted his father.

Donnie: But we don’t eat humans. Mama says they’re too fatty and not good for us.

Dad: I know. But it was too late to reason with them.

He continued the story.Image result for medieval village

Every time someone disappeared from a village, it was blamed on the dragons. We moved further and further away, but it was always the same story.

Some “brave” human would track down a dragon, lure the dragon close, and put a spear through his throat. Then the human would cut off the tail (no bones) and take it home. They never brought back the missing person because they “had arrived just as the dragon finished eating.”

The dragons sent a representative to town. He was trying to straighten out the situation. But as soon as he landed, he was attacked. He barely escaped with his life.

Image result for meddle not in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup

A bookseller created a warning sign for the dragons to put at the entrance to their lairs, but it didn’t do any good. It was written in English, but the villagers couldn’t read.

Donnie: What’s ketchup?

Dad: I’m not sure. I think it’s a sauce to make humans taste better.

The dragons left for a place called Wales. Those people were much friendlier to them. But the situation was not good. The dragons were afraid all the time.

The Western dragons and Eastern dragons met high in the mountains of Asia. They decided that there was probably no way to repair the relationship with the humans.

Image result for dragon reading a book

Because dragons are generally peace-loving creatures, they tried to find a non-violent solution. They looked through the Book of Spells. Finally, they found one that would make them invisible.

Some of the Eastern dragons weren’t happy with the solution. They had human friends they would have to leave. But there was no other answer.

Image result for tibetan mountains

The dragons decided that they would all live together in those mountains. And here we are.

Donnie:  Do you think the humans will ever be able to see us again?

Dad: I’m afraid not. The spell can’t be reversed.

Donnie: That’s good. I don’t want to set someone on fire just to keep my tail.

Image result for and they lived happily ever after