24

The Big Chill (Feline Edition)

Greetings everyone. It’s me, Snoops. It seems like a very long time since I’ve talked with you. It seems like every time I start to say something, someone…

Sgt Stripes: What’re you up to Snoops? Not trying to hijack the blog are you?

Snoops: How could I hijack it? I started it. With Kommando, remember?

Sgt Stripes: Not really. I wasn’t around then.

Snoops: My point. Exactly.

Sgt Stripes: But she’s gone. And I’ve taken her place, right?

Snoops (growling): You have not taken her place, you big goofball. No one can take her place.

Sgt Stripes: Don’t get mad, Snoops. I didn’t mean it like that.

Snoops: What did you mean?

Sgt Stripes: Don’t you remember? You added me as co-owner of the blog.

Snoops: Yes, I did. What’s your point?

Sgt Stripes: I just wanted to know what you were going to talk about?

Snoops: I was going to tell everyone about the barely tolerable living conditions the past week or so.

Gypsy: You mean how we almost froze to death?

Angel: It really was unacceptable.

Onyx: Especially for us smaller cats.

Sgt Stripes: And it went on for days.

Gypsy: Did you hear Mom’s extremely lame excuse? She said she wasn’t really paying attention because it’s not that late in the season. Snoops, apparently your original human didn’t really believe in turning on the heat until November 1, regardless of the weather. That’s downright inhumane.

Sgt Stripes: Then when my humans was complaining about it, she told him that he’d have to wait until she could call the repairman in the morning. And he was already sick!

Snoops: It gets even worse. When she called in, she said it wasn’t an emergency. We had to wait four more days for them to come. Something about needing to take time off work.

Gypsy: She didn’t take any time off work. She brought the work here. She could have done that any time. It was really cold!

Sgt Stripes: I don’t think the humans really understood how bad it was. They were gone during the day and had blankets and electric paw warmers.

Snoops: I think Mom finally understood on the day she stayed home waiting for the guy to fix everything. It was only 48 degrees inside she said. And her handwriting was really bad because of it. I don’t know what any of that means, but she was a lot more sympathetic to us.

Sgt Stripes: She even got blankets for each of the kitties.

Angel: We shared.

Gypsy: I would get a good spot, then you’d kick me out.

Angel: Then Sarge would kick me out. It’s a good thing there were enough to go around.

Snoops: I spent that last day on her lap. I was helping her work.

Onyx: It was a really pretty day. I was sunning in the window.

Snoops: Until you decided that you wanted to sit on the inside porch.

Onyx: What’s wrong with that?

Snoops: When Mom opened the door for the repairman, you took off outside again.

Gypsy: Mom was not pleased.

Angel: The guy was really upset. He tried to help her bring you back.

Onyx: She’s way too slow for me. It was a beautiful day.

Gypsy: So why’d you come back in?

Onyx: The repairman was really nice. I thought he’d give me treats. But he brought me back inside. Then I got locked in the study for the rest of the time he was here. It was humiliating. I don’t think Mom trusted me after that.

Snoops: I can’t imagine why.

Gypsy: At least it got fixed.

Sgt Stripes: I heard the guy talking to Mom. It needs something called a thermostat. I guess a lot of humans need them because he had to order one.

Snoops: So why did it get warmer?

Sgt Stripes: He did some kind of adjustment and showed Mom what to do in case it goes off again.

Gypsy: So there’s still a chance we could all freeze to death.

Onyx: That is really annoying.

25

Our View of Winter

Snoops and Kommando Kitty here. We have been wracking our brains trying to come up with a winter-friendly post. We live in Michigan, where it is cold for several months each year. Usually it’s snowy too. And gray. We’re indoor kitties, so this is not our favorite time of year.

We can’t use our catio:

20+ Photos Proving That Cats and Snow Are Not Meant for Each Other / Bright  Side

Cat TV is really bad most of the time:

Cat Standing In The Snow | Know Your Meme

The humans track in snow and cold:

Quickly! Back in the House! - Lolcats - lol | cat memes | funny cats |  funny cat pictures with words on them | funny pictures | lol cat memes |  lol cats

And it gets cold inside sometimes (by our standards):

Baby it's cold outside... Click the Photo For More Adorable and Cute Cat  Videos and Photos #cutecats #cats #kittens #catv… | Cute baby cats, Baby  cats, Pretty cats

All in all, we really don’t like winter:

44+] Cats in Snow Wallpaper on WallpaperSafari

That said, we know that some cats adapt rather well to the weather. We found a few activities that you might try if you are one of those outdoorsy types.

Playing catch:

Fur Laughs: Watch Funny Cats Versus Snow In Winter [VIDEOS] - CatTime

Building a snow cat:

Live cats pose with neighborhood snow cat - The Columbian

Skiing:

Watch Taddy the Cat Nail Some Nasty Snowboard Tricks - Nerdist

Sledding:

Dog Pulls Cat Around In Sled...And The Cat LOVES It - Videos - The Dodo

Mountain-climbing:

This Alberta cat loves to ski, paddle or 'meow-taineer' with his human |  CBC News

We hope that all of you are enjoying your winters. We’re kinda hanging out, getting extra snuggles, and waiting for spring.

Pictures courtesy of Google Images (except us)

6

Critter Capers: Wintertime Blues

Super Snooper (SS): It’s good to finally be back.

Kommando Kitty (KK): Yeah. Mom’s been sick so much this winter that she keeps putting off typing our article. It is nice having her around to sleep with, though.

SS: Particularly when she turns on that bed warmer thing.

KK: It’s really nice when she turns it on and goes away for a few minutes. We can lay on the warmest spot before she gets in bed.

SS: And she finally understands that it’s impossible to move both of us at the same time. The only bad thing is that they shut the door to downstairs down. So we have to find someone to let us up there.

KK: Dad keeps talking about how much it would cost to heat the upstairs as warm as the downstairs. He makes it sound like it’s warm downstairs.

SS: I know. We have to sleep together to keep from freezing. And we have fur!

                   IMG_20150108_010733762

Horatio Hedgehog (HH): What are you two yowling about now?

KK: How cold it is. Mom won’t even open the drapes sometimes. She says the old windows let cold air in. Why don’t they just buy new windows? Why should we have to suffer?

HH: It doesn’t feel very cold to me.

SS: That’s because your cage is heated!

HH: I come out to explore sometimes.

SS: Dad puts you on a heated blanket before you go anywhere!

HH: Maybe he just likes me better.

(low growls)

HH: Well, you know I am more popular. My introduction was the favorite story last year according to that report Mom got. (https://cat9984.wordpress.com/2014/02/08/horatio-hedgehog-intrepid-explorer )

KK: Yeah, we saw it. You were a couple of spots above the one talking about fake cheese (https://cat9984.wordpress.com/2013/10/24/cheez-whiz-love-it-or-hate-it )

HH: You’re just jealous. There is one problem with Mom being sick. Dad forgot to tell her that I was almost out of treats before she stayed home from work. No wax worms for days!

KK and SS: Awwww. Poor hedgie!

HH: Fine. I’ll just go back to my nice warm bed and sleep.

20150111_221420

SS: Let’s go see if there’s any food left in the kitchen.

KK: OK. Then we can go back to sleep.

0

Guess What I Learned!!

To celebrate the kids going back to school tomorrow (finally) and the truly lovely weather we’ve been having, I have put together a little quiz. You can see whether any of the mind-numbing number of facts “experts” have been giving out have been sticking. We will be using the honor system here, so I trust there will be no cheating. If somehow you are caught cheating, you will be shipped to the Arctic Circle and handcuffed to a polar bear.

1. Which of the following is not something painful that can happen to your body in cold weather? a. Chilblain; b. Creeping Crud; c. Deep Frostbite; d. Frostnip; e. Superficial Frostbite; f. Trench Foot

2. The following are the symptoms of what disease: sore throat, fever, headache, muscle aches, congestion,cough? a. Bronchitis; b. Common Cold; c. Flu; d. Strep Throat; e. Whatever is currently going around that someone has given me; f. Whooping Cough

3. Which of the following is not true of the differences between a cold and the flu? a. Cold symptoms come on more quickly; b. Flu lasts longer than a cold; c. I get more sympathy when I tell someone I have the flu; d. There are many more things that cause a cold

4. Influenza A is the most common type of flu virus. What area has not been identified as a starting point for one of the viruses? a. Asia; b. China; c. The local high school where the kids share everything; d. Russia; e. Spain

5. What species are the only ones susceptible to Influenza B? a. Ferrets; b. Humans; c. People who steal the food and office supplies of sick coworkers; d. Pigs; e. Seals

6. Which of the following cities is not in the top ten in average annual snowfall in the U.S.? a. Amherst, NY; b. Clay, NY; c. Cocnino, AZ; d. Duluth, MN; e. Niagara Falls, NY

7. How many states have an average winter temperature of less than 20 degree fahrenheit? a. Three; b. Five; c. Seven; d. Nine; e. Who cares, I’m tired of slipping on the ice?

8. What sport will finally be ending its television season in February? a. College Football; b. Curling; c. Detroit Pistons basketball; d. Pro Football; e. Southern Hemisphere Beach Volleyball; f. You mean my significant other really hasn’t been watching reruns of the same games since November?

9. How many Olympic Sports require ice skates? a. Three; b. Five; c. Seven; d. Nine; e. You mean it’s already time for the Olympics again?

The answers are below.

1. b (a form of jungle rot); 2. c; 3. a (cold symptoms come on gradually); 4. b; 5. all but d; 6. d.(it’s #15); 7. c (Alaska, N. Dakota; Minnesota; Maine, Wisconsin, Vermont, S. Dakota); 8. d; 9. b (curling, figure skating, ice hockey, short-track speed skating, speed skating).

Scoring (Number Right):

8 – 9: Obviously you have spent too much time in front of the TV/Computer Screen. Go out and learn how to ski jump or snowboard.

4 – 7: You may be obsessed with winter germs/diseases. Go to the mall and practice the safe hygiene tips you have learned.

1 – 3: You may have spent time reading an actual book or interacting socially with other people. Go get your flu shot and start washing your hands more.

0: You have been asleep for the past two months. Return to your hibernation.