The day after Christmas, the cats gathered to discuss the Christmas goings-on. 

 

Snoops: Christmas 2025 seemed to go pretty well.

Sgt Stripes: I didn’t see any huge new cat tree. I thought we were supposed to get a new cat tree.

Onyx: I heard them talking. Apparently the little humans got some kind of present called bunk beds. The male human appears to be the only one who can put stuff together and that comes before the cat tree.

Angel: That’s not fair. There’s only two of them and five of us.

Gypsy: Will they make less noise if they get the new beds?

Angel: Ooh. I’d wait for that.

Onyx: What’s a bunk bed?

Sgt Stripes: I don’t know. But hopefully, they will stay in it later than the current beds. My morning routine has been ruined. I used to hang out with Mom in the morning on weekends. Now they’re up before I finish my first set of cuddles. And I used to be able to get a couple of rounds of treats. Now, I’m lucky if I get one.

Snoops: You don’t need extra treats, But the fewer cuddles are a problem.

Angel: They come downstairs and make noise too.

Gypsy: Good thing Blondie is still sleeping down here because of her foot surgery. Otherwise, we’d have to deal with them.

Snoops: I’m not sure new beds are the answer. Maybe they should have gotten some kind of snack bar. That one kid is always hungry.

Sgt Stripes: That would have been cool. We could have stored cat snacks in it too.

Onyx: The kid probably would have eaten those too.

Snoops: At least dinner was good.

Angel: Only if you eat human food.

Snoops: It was a big salmon in some kind of pastry. It was delicious. And they had cookies too. I fell asleep afterwards.

Sgt Stripes: They had something called eggnog too. I guess sometimes humans put other stuff in it, but ours was just some kind of cream. Very yummy.

Gypsy: I don’t really like lots of people. I stayed in my new favorite spot – a shelf in the pantry.

Angel: That is pretty sweet. Right above the heat.

Gypsy: It’s the perfect spot. There’s a chain on the door, so the little humans can’t get in. But I didn’t get to see most of Christmas. Did the humans like our presents?

Sgt Stripes: It didn’t turn out quite the way we hoped. It was hard to get on the computer. So we had to just add to the human order. I will say that Snoops did a fine job with our human brother. He got an ultra-plush, ultra-large cotton towel.

Snoops: I tested it after it got opened. It will be purr-fect for catnaps. To be fair, Sarge did a good job with our human sister Blondie. She got a plush robe with cat ears on the hood. Stylish, but really comfortable for laying on.

Gypsy: Sounds pawsome! What did you get Mom?

Snoops: Apparently Onyx didn’t understand the assignment. She got a lamp.

Onyx: What’s wrong with a lamp? It’s two cats that light up.

Angel: There isn’t anyplace for us to lay on.

Onyx: You can wrap around it. The bulb’s at the bottom. It should get warm. And she really likes it.

Angel: I’ll have to do the shopping when it’s time for her birthday.

Snoops: Anyway, that’s over. Now it’s time to choose our tree. I’m thinking that since it’s late, we should get something even better.

Sgt Stripes: Yeah. Maybe a place for treats.

Gypsy: I want real wood to sharpen my claws.

Angel: And plush beds.

Sgt Stripes: Time to talk to Mr Google again.