On this edition of Cat Forum our two resident experts, Super Snoops (SS) and Kommando Kitty (KK) will answer questions regarding living with their somewhat unusual housemate, Horatio Hedgehog.
Host: How did you feel when the humans brought a hedgehog into the house?
SS: We didn’t know what it was. It looked like a gift for us that needed to be unwrapped to get rid of all the pointy things.
KK: But it smelled horrible. Not like any mouse I’d ever known.
Host: When did you find out what it really was?
KK: The male human was cuddling it. Can you imagine actually wanting to hold that?
SS: And he held it up to the female, and said it was an early Christmas present. She was all excited and told him how cute it was. No accounting for taste.
KK: We went on the computer and looked it up. It said African Pygmy Hedgehog.
SS: We wondered when it would be going back to the Africa Hedge.
KK: Soon we hoped. It smelled really bad.
Host: Did you try to make friends with it?
SS: I went up and tried to sniff it, but it totally ignored me. I put out a paw and it totally ignored me. I went a little closer. It was way too prickly to get close to.
KK: I looked from the distance. It was all rolled up and made funny noises. And it smelled …
Host: Yes, we understand. Hedgehogs smell bad. Did he sleep with you?
SS: They gave him a cage, so I didn’t have to worry about being attacked in the middle of the night.
KK: True. But it was a really nice cage. His exercise equipment was right there. Along with his food and his water.
SS: And he got really good food. Better kibble than us.
KK: And a heater.
Host: Did you try to make him feel at home?
KK (purring): Did you know they eat hedgehogs in some places?
Host: Moving on. Did he get in the way of cuddle time with your humans?
SS: Not really. Apparently hedgehogs like it warm, and the humans keep our house at cuddle temperature (as they like to call freezing). So he only came out at night.
KK: I don’t know why they bothered. All he did was sit in a ball and sound like he was going to explode. I don’t understand the appeal. You can’t cuddle it, you can’t play with it, and you can’t eat it. It doesn’t even look attractive all balled up.
Host: I imagine things have smoothed out a bit.
SS: Yes, he seems to have calmed down a little….
KK: And he almost ran away from home twice. I even had to rescue him one time. And they gave him a couple of baths. It was hilarious. The only thing funnier than a wet dog is a wet hedgehog. He tried to shake the water from his quills.
Host: Did I hear you correctly Kommando Kitty? You rescued him?
KK: Yeah. The idiot tried to go down some stairs. I stood guard over his lifeless little body until a human noticed. Turns out he wasn’t lifeless, he was sleeping.
Host: So things must be a little better.
SS: I watch from my cat tree. He appears to have bonded with the male human – my male human – rather than the female human – her human (motions at Kommando Kitty). He even ate out of my human’s hand. See if I ever eat out of his hand. (tail flap)
KK: Horatio does ignore my human now. Pretty good trick of hers – buy him worms and let the male human feed him. I still stay close to keep an eye on him, though.
Host: The three of you are living in harmony now?
SS: You could say that.
KK: Yeah. We don’t look up hedgehog recipes on the computer anymore.
Host: Well, I guess that wraps us up for this edition of Cat Forum. Come by the next time for a discussion of Baths: Evil Incarnate?